I ran my hand down my face, wincing as my fingers made contact with the sore spot on my cheek.
I was arrested two days ago for criminal damage. The cop had been less than gentle when he had cuffed me and slammed me down on the hood of the police cruiser. My face had collided with the hood of the car, resulting in a nasty bruise.
Dania had screeched and screamed about police brutality when she had come to pick me up from the precinct after posting my bail.
I had done a lot of stupid things over the years. This was just the last in a long line of poor decisions.
I rolled over onto my side and stared out into the murky shadows.
I hadn’t thought ofhimfor a long time. I had purposefully evicted him from my mind and my hardened heart.
So why was it that my subconscious mind found its way back tohimnow?
I swung my legs over the side of my bed and sat up, turning on the bedside lamp.
I picked up the tiny Parthenon that I had bought on a whim.
It was pretty and detailed and I liked how it fit in the palm of my hand.
Since receiving it I had thought abouthimmore than I was comfortable with. Maybe it reminded me of watchinghimdraw in his notebooks for hours.
Whatever the reason, I was here, wide-awake. And it was all his fault.
Because I had dreamt of Flynn.
The harder I tried to remember, the quicker the images faded. Glimpses of his face. Memories of touching his hand and his soft, shy smiles.
The recollections of fluttery warmth in my belly whenever we were together.
He always came back to me when I least expected it.
When I had convinced my head and my heart to never think…to never feel anything for him again.
But he was there. Wedged deep. Unmoving.
In the silence of the early morning, I let myself feel something that wasn’t hatred and rage.
It was something quieter. Something dangerous.
And it was only, ever forhim.
But I squashed it under the heaviness of bitter resentment and it washed away the good. The warmth.
It was like it was never there.
**
“I’m stuffed!” Nadine groaned, patting her belly. I tried to finish my dinner without hurling my fork at the guys sitting at the table beside us who had been checking us out since we arrived.
Nadine had insisted on getting dolled up. I hadn’t brought much in the way of clothing, so she lent me a low cut, black shirt, which I paired with my dark skinny jeans and black boots.
I felt more than a little uncomfortable and had spent most of the evening pulling the neck of my shirt up over my boobs. Nadine wasn’t quite aswell endowedas I was in that department.
As bummed as I had been when I arrived, I enjoyed exploring her neighborhood. It was vibrant and exciting. There was a lot going on and it was hard to find a quiet place. Even the coffee shops and record stores had a vibe that was full of energy. I could see why Nadine enjoyed living there.
Even if she was apparently living off Raman and using single ply toilet paper.
“It’s totally worth it, Ells!” she had claimed and I could tell she meant it.
