I was going to hell. My soul would be lost.
But what about my heart?
Bastian squeezed my hand and the negative thoughts flittered away. Being with him was enough to dispel the demons that clawed at me.
Demons that I now saw were created by the one man who I had been told would defeat them.
We saw no one. The Retreat was quiet. Everyone was at The Sun Sanctuary.
For a brief time, we were all alone.
Bastian opened the door to his house, hesitating before stepping inside. I didn’t follow him right away.
I knew that if I took that final step, nothing would be the same.
But everything was already different. My life was spiraling. I felt as though my entire world had dropped out from underneath me.
I was drowning in lies.
I was suffocating in truth.
Yet there was a glow in front of me. Glowing like the first rays of a sunrise. It warmed me. It gave me something to cling to.
Bastian…
He chewed on his bottom lip. I could tell he was worried. His beautiful blue eyes were troubled.
“Sara. I’m not expecting anything. I would never…”
Decisively, I stepped over the threshold, closing the door behind me. It was dark. The moonlight gave everything an almost ethereal quality.
“I can light the lamp.” Bastian started to fumble around, banging into the table beside one of the two small beds. “Fuck. Shit, I’m sorry—”
I reached out for him. Taking his hands. Pulling him close. “It’s perfect,” I said softly, scared to speak any louder.
Bastian slowly brought my hand to his mouth. He kissed my knuckles. The underside of my wrist—the scars I hid there. Even in the shadow, his face was clear. I feasted on the sight of him. It erased all my misgivings. My fear.
There was only him.
Only me.
Only this.
We may only have this brief moment in time. It could all come crashing down around us at any second. But I knew, that at the end of the world, his face was the only thing I wanted to see.
“Something happened to you, Sara. What was it?” he asked. I wished he hadn’t. It brought it all back. Every soul crushing minute.
I squeezed his hands tight enough that he winced. “Don’t, Bastian,” I warned. Low and serious.
“You can tell me anything.” He kissed my hand again.
“I don’t want to talk.” I pressed my body against his. We fit perfectly. As though we were meant to be like this.
Maybe we were.
Or maybe we weren’t.
It didn’t matter. Because on this small piece of the earth, it was only us.
