Bobbie stepped forward, giving Stafford a slight shove. “You better hope Pastor doesn’t hear howyou’rebehaving. I’d be more worried about my own soul than anyone else’s if I were you.”
Minnie looped her arm with Stafford’s. “Come on. Let’s go.” She sniffed as if she smelled something bad. “We don’t want to be tainted by association.”
The two walked off and I knew that Pastor Carter would hear about Bastian and me. The thought filled me with horror.
“Thanks Bobbie,” I said, more than a little surprised by his defense.
Bobbie shrugged. “Stafford and Minnie are jerks. None of the others see it because they’re very good at wearing two faces. But I see it. You see it.” He glanced at Bastian, who still looked ready to hurt someone. “You need to settle down. And maybe be less obvious about what’s going on between the two of you.”
It was solid advice and Bastian seemed to take it. He relaxed marginally. “Thanks, Bobbie. I appreciate it.”
Bobbie shrugged again. “It’s what any brother would do for another.”
Caitlyn was silent. She seemed uncomfortable. She kept glanced from Bastian to me then back to Bastian. She had always looked up to me. She had always looked to me for spiritual guidance. But she looked at me now as if I had killed someone close to her. As if I had destroyed something inside of her forever.
“I thought you were following the path like the rest of us,” she said softly, her fingers clasped tightly in front of her. “But here you are with him. You know you shouldn’t. That Pastor Carter warned us about the temptation of sin, but you’re doing it anyway. Like you don’t care about your eternal soul.”
Bobbie regarded her with concern. “It’s okay, Cait. This has nothing to do with you.”
Caitlyn grew rigid. “You’re one of God’s chosen. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?” She was full of righteous indignation.
I took a step around Bastian so I could face Caitlyn. “Of course, it does. Iamfollowing the path.”
I was lying to her. I wasn’t following the same path as everyone else. Not anymore.
I had started walking a different way a month ago.
Caitlyn shook her head. “Minnie’s right. Being around you will taint us all by association. We have our own souls to think about.”
“Caitlyn—”
“Bobbie, let’s go.” Caitlyn ignored me completely. I could see the moment when she shunned me. Turned her back. I had betrayed her trust. Her faith in me.
She wouldn’t forgive me for this.
I felt the chill of her disapproval. Of her disgust.
“Take care,” was all Bobbie said and the two of them walked away.
Bastian’s entire body sagged. “Shit, that was intense. What was all that about with Caitlyn?” he asked.
“She’s the old me.” I took Bastian’s hand, not caring who could see. It would all be known soon enough anyway. “The person I was before I met you. And I never want to be her again.”
Bastian pressed our joined hands to his heart. “I think you’re exactly the same person you’ve always been. Kind. Loving. Smart. Don’t ever think yourself less than amazing.”
I smiled. Real and true.
I looked at Bastian Scott and saw a different kind of forever.
The kind that could break my heart.
I had left Bastian a short time later. I knew I couldn’t avoid my one-on-one lesson with Pastor Carter. But I wanted to skip it. To spend the rest of my day with Bastian. To touch him. Kiss him. To make unrealistic plans for a future that seemed so out of reach.
But I couldn’t.
Because I was scared that to embrace that other future would mean losing my soul. I told Caitlyn I was still on the path, and even though that wasn’t necessarily true anymore, the conditioned fear continued to grip me tight. Bastian didn’t believe the vision of the world Pastor Carter painted.
Yet, that was all I had ever been told. I was raised to believe in one thing. In one person.
