He hoped that I was. He prayed he wasn’t making a mistake. That his feelings for me were well placed.
I was terrified that the longer he held on, the harder it would be for me to disappear.
That he wouldn’t let me.
Why did that make me happy?
Was Toxicwrath right?
“I have to head back to my place and feed Tigger and get changed before work.” Mason continued to hold me, neither of us moving. He kissed my hair again, letting his mouth linger. “But I think I’ll stay like this for a little while longer, if that’s all right,” he whispered.
I nodded, my throat too tight, my heart too full. And we listened to each other breathe in the dark, wishing for things that could never be.
I didn’t realize until the tears had dried on my skin that I had been crying.
Chapter 22
Hannah
I was nervous. Worse than nervous. I was a quivering mess.
I stood out front of the large redbrick building housing the Richmond FBI field office and tried to make myself go inside. The building was imposing and more than a little intimidating, which didn’t help.
I clutched my car keys in my hand, the sharp edges biting into my palm. The tiny thumb drive sat snugly on the silver unicorn key chain. Unobtrusive. Unnoticeable.
Mason was expecting me. I had to go inside.
Toxicwrath’s words from earlier rang through my head.
Shut it down.
I couldn’t. I had come too far. I needed to be able to track my case. I couldn’t risk getting caught.
I had to know if Mason was closing in.
Even if it meant betraying him.
My chest hurt at the thought.
It came down to what was more important.
My freedom or my heart.
I thought about Charlotte and knew that getting caught wasn’t an option.
But neither was hurting Mason.
I was screwed no matter what I did.
Unless he never finds out.
Could I live with lying to him every day? Could I really think about building a future with a man I couldn’t be honest with?
My whole life is a web of lies. What’s one more added to the pile?
I felt as if I were living on borrowed time. I knew I couldn’t keep up the act indefinitely. Pretending to be the loving girlfriend was harder than it looked.
But I wasn’t exactly pretending anymore, was I?
