Yoss looked at me as if I had grown another head. “What are you talking about?”
“For starters, working in a hospital, I have to be vaccinated against all sorts of diseases. Including hep B.” My fingers curled up to cup his cheek. “And if we take precautions.” I leaned up on my tiptoes and kissed his mouth. “We can be together, Yoss. It is possible.”
“I’d never forgive myself if I made you sick.” He closed his eyes briefly.
“There’s no rush. We don’t have to do anything tonight. Just being here together is enough.” Even though I was a quivering mess of unfulfilled desire, I gave him a reassuring smile.
“It’s late, we should get some sleep,” I said softly, taking his hand and leading him down the hallway.
We walked past the room where Yoss had been staying. Neither of us said anything when I opened the door to my bedroom. He wouldn’t be sleeping in another bed. Not tonight.
Never again.
Without saying a word I quickly changed into a T-shirt while Yoss stripped off his clothes. Together we got under the covers and I rolled onto my side as Yoss pressed himself against my back.
A simple dance we had performed a hundred times before.
His hand found mine in the darkness.
He began to hum a song. A tune I didn’t really recognize. It didn’t matter.
I fell asleep wrapped in his comforting familiarity.
Fifteen Years Earlier
After my shower I curled up beside Yoss on the bed and fell into a deep, uninterrupted sleep.
When I woke up hours later, the room was pitch black and I was disoriented. All I knew was that I was warm. Deliciously so. I snuggled underneath the blankets, making a cocoon.
Then I realized I was alone. That wasn’t right. I never slept alone.
For a few strange minutes I thought I was back at The Pit. Which made no sense because I was never warm there.
Then I remembered where I was.
And what had happened.
Bug.
I sat up in bed and rubbed my eyes until they adjusted to the dimness. Yoss wasn’t in bed with me. And from what I could see he wasn’t in the room. I quickly put on my jeans and sweatshirt before checking the bathroom. It was dark. No Yoss.
The first threads of anxiety uncurled in my gut.
Where was he?
I slipped on my still damp shoes and opened the door to the room, a blast of cold air and cigarette smoke hitting me in the face.
Yoss leaned against a post staring out into the night, watching the snow fall steadily. The glow from the end of his cigarette flared as he inhaled.
He turned around at the sound the opening the door.
“Hey,” he said softly.
“Hey.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “What are you doing out here? It’s freezing.”
Yoss blew out a lungful of smoke and looked back out across the parking lot.
“Couldn’t sleep and I didn’t want to wake you up with my tossing and turning.” Another puff on the cigarette. “It’s still early, you should try to sleep some more.”
