I melt. Faster than snow in a furnace.
And, thanks to signal, parental embarrassment, and my brave, honest Nate, everything becomes crystal clear. Everything becomes beautifully, perfectly simple at long last.
“I love you,” I breathe.
His eyes light up. “Even though you just broke up with - ”
“With a dickhead. And then I walked straight into the arms of the guy I’ve always wanted.Yes, I love you, doofus!” I throw my arms around his neck, feeling like I’m finally where I belong.
“Thank fuck,” he sighs into my hair. “I’ll never want anything else again.”
As I turn my head to kiss him, he meets me halfway, and the rest of the messages on my phone get forgotten for a while as we gasp and moan and seal the deal.
Twice.
***
“So,” Nate says once he’s caught his breath. “Your mom. My dad. Again.”
I nod, tangling my fingers with his above our heads. “That was unexpected.” Mum normally doesn’t give men second chances. “I’ll catch up with her later.”
“Good luck.”
OK, I can’t put it off any longer. “I still have to talk to my team.”
His expression sobers, and he kisses my forehead. “I’m right here.”
I pick up my phone again and scroll through the messages more thoroughly now Mum knows I’m safe and well. There are twenty from teammates, none of them Olivia. Seven from the coach. Three from the federation.
One from Josh, which I delete without reading.
My stomach twists when I see an email from the committee, sent the day after I arrived here.
The words blur as I read. Then sharpen.
Then hit like a truck.
Allyson Montrose — Notice of Removal from US Women’s Olympic Archery Team
Reason: Unprofessional conduct & abandonment of training camp without authorization.
I inhale sharply. That’s it. My dreams die right here and right now. Cause of death: my own stupid temper, coupled with hypothermia from getting stuck in the snow with no way to communicate my reasons for my actions.
“No,” I whisper. “No,fuck-”
“Ally?” Nate sits up fast, hand on my thigh.
“I’m off the team,” I say, voice thin as I hand him the email to read. “They’ve cut me. They’re saying I abandoned camp.”
His jaw tightens. “You didn’t abandon them. And what about Josh and Olivia’sunprofessional contact?! You walked in on -”
“I should have told someone,” I whisper. “I should have found a way to call the coach. I should have… Shit, what have I done?” Tears sting hot and sudden. I swipe at them angrily.
“Hey,” Nate murmurs, cupping my cheek. “Look at me.”
I do.
“You worked your ass off for that spot. If they dropped you because you dared to be a human being in crisis, that’s on them, not you.”
