“Hey, now,” Zara reassured me. “This isn’t on you.Youdidn’t get too handsy with your girlfriend at a public event and then assault a stranger.”
“I don’t know if I’d sayassault. Severn was just trying to get the camera from him. He had pretty scandalous photos of me. That guy was baiting him, trying to provoke a reaction. He was calling me awful names and taking indiscreet pictures.”
“So what, now you forgive Severn? Are younotgoing to quit?”
I hesitated. These were the type of tangled, messy thoughts that had been tumbling around in my mind all night since leaving the gala.Even long before that. I had to admit that I’d had doubts about Severn since even before we started dating. His quick temper, his control issues, his fae fickleness. After what happened with my last boss, Professor Decker, I had sworn to stay away from powerful men but had fallen into bed with Severn at practically the first chance. Was that really how soft my backbone was? Didn’t I haveanyresolve?
My phone beeped—it had been beeping every few minutes since I left the gala, texts from Severn wanting to talk to me.
“I’m going to keep my job,” I decided at last, tugging on a loose thread on my pajama hem. Like everything else in my life, it was unraveling. “Because of Henry and May. I can’t leave them, especially now, when there are people who might want to use them to get to Severn. As angry as I am with Severn, he’s right about getting out of town for a while. Even if we break up and I’m no longer his girlfriend, I could still be a target, and the kids for sure. I need to remain their nanny at least through the summer. When they start school, I can help find another caretaker for them.”
At least this was one decision I’d made. Tomorrow, I’d get on the plane to Italy with the children. I wouldn’t let them know that anything had changed between me and Severn—it was my job as an adult to shelter them from fears and drama that would only cause them needless anxiety.
“And Severn?” Zara asked, fluffing up a pillow like it was his face she was tenderizing.
I drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly, but the knot in my chest remained tight. “It’s over. We go back to a working relationship. Boss and nanny, that’s it.” The ache in my chest squeezed harder, and I pressed my palm against it as if I could rub away the pain. A voice inside me screamed that I was making a mistake, throwing away the most passionate relationship I’d ever had.
Zara nodded, patting my knee comfortingly. “Fae don’t make good boyfriends.”
I almost let out a laugh at how true that was, but then it threatened to turn into tears again. My heart physically ached to think of not being with Severn anymore. Never smiling at him across the dinner table, so close to almost being a real family. No more passionate nights in bed. No more trying to unlock the fascinating puzzle of what made him who he was, tearing down his walls one by one to see the beautiful and tortured soul within.
“I care about him,” I admitted, “but that isn’t enough. Caring doesn’t magically turn him into a person I can be with. He’ll always be the prince who is used to getting his way, who thinks he can give a command and have it instantly answered. Whose obsessions might change from dawn to dusk, and who expects everyone to scramble to accommodate him.” I shook my head as tears started to flow again.
Zara squeezed my knee harder. Softly, she said, “For what it’s worth, I did see a change in him. Hewastrying. But at the end of the day, he’s still fae. And they’llalwaysbe assholes.”
I sniffled again. “It seems to work for Talon and Mia.”
“Talon isn’t a prince.”
Mia had mentioned to me a few times how difficult it was to date a fae, so I knew their relationship was hardly perfect, either. Talon had never been a very social fae, preferring to keep to himself or hang out with Mia. From what I’d seen, he could still be an asshole but in a slightly more tolerable way.
A knock came at the apartment’s front door. Both Zara and I went still. Then, Zara unfolded herself from the bed and said, “Let me see who it is, okay?”
I bit my lip, already knowing who it was. Severn’s texts had grown increasingly unhinged as the night went on and I hadn’t responded. At first, he’d tried to rein in his emotions, claiming he simply wanted to talk and apologize. Then, his text had gotten erratic. Begging to see me, begging me not to quit, ordering me to reconsider, commanding me to answer, cursing himself for his possessiveness, only to again demand that I not break things off.
He’s only proving that I made the right choice.
Zara returned a few moments later, looking wary. “It’s him. I told him you didn’t want to see him, but he’s insisting. I think he’s probably going to break down the door if you don’t talk to him.”
I sighed and unfolded my legs. I knew I must look like a snotty mess, but I didn’t care.It’s over anyway. “It’s okay, I’ll talk to him.”
“I’ll be there with a spell if you need me to kill him.”
I gave a weak grin.
Sure enough, even though Zara had closed and locked the door, Severn was standing in the open doorframe—hehadbroken it down, the lock melted by fae magic. He was still dressed in his suit from the gala, attempting to restrain himself, hovering at the threshold to give me my space. I knew that he probably wanted to rave and rant, stomp around and give me orders, but he was smart enough to know that would only push me away more.
“Okay,” Zara said with the sharp authority of a prison guard. “You have two minutes with her. That’s it, fae.”
Severn narrowed his eyes at Zara, but then his expression softened when he angled to face me. “Willow. I know I let myself get out of control. I thought youwantedto have sex in the coatroom—”
“It isn’t just about what happened in the coatroom,” I interrupted, hugging my robe around my pajamas. “Or even what happened after with that paparazzo. It’s bigger than that. I can’t be with someone who thinks of me as a warm body who only exists to servetheirdesires.”
He scowled. “I don’t think of you that way.”
“You do. You can’t help it. You’re fae.”
He looked like he might argue again, but I held up a hand before he could start. “Listen, I take back what I said about quitting. I’ll stay in my job but only for the kids, and only through the summer. That will give you time to find a replacement. Itisdangerous in the city, so I’ll still take them to Italy tomorrow as planned.”
