“Cerian, I-I wasn’t asking you to look away.”
His eyes snap back to her flaming cheeks.
“I’ve just never done this before,” she whispers. “Whatever this is. But you don’t have to look away.”
He doesn’t want to look away. She’s...breathtaking. His fire magic agrees, if his tingling hands are any indication.
“You know, I think it’s only fair for you to reciprocate,” she says. “I shouldn’t be the only one standing here in whatever I’m wearing.” There’s a teasing glint in her eyes, and his ears flood with warmth to match the heat filling the rest of him.
She’s right. This was his idea, after all. And he’s certainly not planning to go in the water fully clothed.
Her teeth chatter as she wraps her arms around herself. Whistling wind. He needs to get her warm before she becomes ill standing in the snow wearing...that. But first, he needs to take off his own leathers.
Tentatively, he reaches for the hem of his shirt. It’s not as if she hasn’t seen him without it. With one smooth motion, he pulls it over his head and slides his arms free. When he glances at her, she’s trying not to smile.
And failing miserably.
Then another shiver sweeps over her. “I’m sorry. I need to get in the water before I freeze.”
He nods in relief. This will be easier without her standing there watching him.
She hurries to the biggest spring and lowers herself to the edge, and while she’s doing that, he quickly strips to his own small clothes before joining her where her legs hang in the warm water.
“Cerian,” she says softly as his legs dip into the spring beside her. It’s perfectly warm and relaxing, and it takes the edge off his fire magic. Arisanna finds his eyes, and he doesn’t look away. A vulnerability laces her expression,and he just wants to pull her close and protect her from everything. Forever.
The thought makes him want to run.
But when he sees her sitting there beside him like that, goosebumps pebbling her flesh, which he’s never seen so much of at once, he can’t imagine running.
Then the memory of Elowyn’s pained voice rings in his ears again, and he struggles to stay in the moment and not feel guilty for thinking of Arisanna while Elowyn might be in trouble.
“You’re fighting demons,” Arisanna whispers as she traces the line between his brows. “I can see it in your eyes.”
“I...” He forces the words out. “I just want to be here with you. But...” Breathing in deeply, he searches for the words he needs, and she doesn’t hurry him. “It’s...terrifying.” It’s hard to admit, but as soon as he says it, he feels a little lighter. “And my head is filled with worries about Elowyn.”
Arisanna’s expression softens as she gazes into his eyes. “Rominy would never let anything happen to her. He doesn’t even think sometimes. It’s who he is—his instinct to protect the people he loves is so strong. He’d guard her with his life, I guarantee it.” Arisanna brushes the hair back from Cerian’s face, and he leans into her touch as she adds, “As for the rest...”
Tensing, he waits for her to keep going as dread tries to find a home in his gut.
“I’m terrified, too,” she says unexpectedly.
“You’re terrified? Of me?”
She shakes her head. “No. Well, maybe at first. But not anymore.”
Relief fills him, though he wouldn’t blame her for being afraid.
“What frightens you?” he asks.
She glances away, and a nervous little laugh that’s part sigh slips past her lips. “This is all happening so fast. I wouldn’t undo any of it, but I feel so...out of control.” Shelooks hesitantly up at him. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to burden you with my struggles. You have enough to—”
He presses his thumb to her lips to quiet her, and he makes himself say the words forming on his tongue. “I...I want to be the one you share your fears with, Arisanna. Let me be strong for you the way you’re strong for me.”
Her breathing grows shallow and heavy, but she doesn’t cry. Does she ever let herself relax? To just exist without trying to measure up to some impossible standard? How heavy this burden she’s carried all her life must have been.
He’s carried the same burden, though hers seems to have weighed differently on her than his did on him. Knowing that so much rested on their future, that this is who they must become—the hope for peace between their kingdoms. It’s been a heavy load to carry.
For both of them.
