His eyes turn glassy. The familiar sarcastic, happy Cameron, gone.
“I believed my sister that night because I saw what you haddone with my own eyes, and Ana is family. At the time, I was willing to do anything to help her.”
Hating what I have to say next, I look at the ceiling, buying some time I know I don’t have.
“There’s another reason I didn’t want to hear your side of the story back then, why I didn’t contact you.”
Cameron doesn’t stray his eyes away from mine when I meet them again.
“The thought of talking to you, hearing you admit to what I thought was the truth, would make everything too real. I couldn’t take any more pain at only seventeen years old. My mom was concerned by how sad I was. I couldn’t do it, Cameron.” My chest inflates as I inhale deeply. “Even though there was still a piece of that girl inside of me when we saw each other in Professor Mills’ class, I’d changed. I would’ve listened to you because all I needed, that I didn’tknowI needed since then, was my best friend. Instead, we wasted energy on hating each other for no good reason. That’s something we both did, and we both have to live with it.”
A tear drops from Cameron’s eye, and it catches me completely off guard. It’s the second time he’s cried in front of me, the first being when we were sixteen because a dog died in a movie. It pulls at my damn heart strings.
I need to stay strong. If he wants my forgiveness and trust, he’ll have to work for it.
“I want to forgive you, Cameron, I truly do because we started to get to know each other again, and it was…you know what it was.” I take a deep breath. “I wish things would’ve gone differently?—”
“Me too.” He wipes the evidence of regret off his face while the sound of students coming in interrupts our moment.
Crossing my arms in order to hide my trembling hands, I muster up the most confidence I’m capable of having at this moment.
“You need to go. Everything that I needed to say tonight was said.”
Knowing I’ll hate seeing him leave, I turn around to my computer. After a couple of seconds, my spine straightens when his body leans on mine. His breath is on my neck, and I have the instant urge to melt into his arms.
“I’m not giving up on us, Kamila. I refuse to. My feelings towards you are so much more than I ever thought possible in this lifetime or the next.” His words drown out the voices around us. “Losing you as a best friend once was torture. Losing you as something more a second time is not an option.” The urge to fall into his arms and kiss him intensifies. These are the types of things you only hear in movies, but they’re still just words, I remind myself. They need to be accompanied by actions.
“I’m too selfish to let you go, so don’t expect me to any time soon.” His lips hover over my neck. And right when I think he’s about to turn me around, I feel a cold wind and almost lose my balance. He’s gone, leaving me wanting him more than I ever have.
Chapter Forty-Seven
CAMERON
With my iPad in hand, I wait for my cousin and his boyfriend’s reactions to everything that happened this semester. Ethan and Chris’ faces remain in the same position they have been in for the past ten minutes.
“Ethan?” Maybe the screen is frozen.
The wifi seems to be steady, yet neither of them moves.
“Guys, please say something.”
“You look like shit,” Ethan says flatly.
“Thanks, Ethan, that really helps.”
I know I look like shit. What I said to Kamila about not being able to sleep wasn’t a lie. I’m going to end up looking like Victor Van Dort if I don’t start eating more than just one meal a day.
“Wait, wait.” Chris holds a hand up. “Let me make sure I got this right. Ana is your ex-girlfriend from high school.”
“Yes,” I confirm.
“And Kamila, her identical twin?—”
“Fraternal twin,” I correct. “The only thing they have in common is that they’re both brunettes; everything else is different. Just ask Ethan.”
My cousin nods while he lights a blunt. “It’s true, they lookmore like second cousins.” He takes a hit. “Also, Kami isn’t a psychotic bitch.”
“Okay,” Chris drawls and takes a long hit from the blunt. “So Ana used to be your girlfriend, and Kamila was your best friend. Until Ana cheated on you with Kamila’s ex-fling, and you decided to get back at her by cheating at the same party where Kamila was in close proximity. Which, seriously, dude? You couldn’t have looked a little harder?”
