"I'm not sure. The doctors said there was nothing wrong with me physically. They recommended I go see a psychiatrist, which I did a couple of times, but I felt crazy, you know?"
"So you came here, thinking maybe that would help heal whatever was wrong?"
"Yeah. I suppose. Or maybe it was just I didn't know what else to do. Playing in front of anyone wasn't an option when I could barely breathe even looking at a piano, let alone the idea of people listening to me."
"That's why you refused me when I asked you if you wanted to play for church."
"Yeah. I'm sorry. It was kind of you to offer, and normally I would've loved to. Hymns are my favorite, and there's just something powerful in the words and the melody together. I could be transported away for timeless moments and come back, not just having enjoyed the music, but having had a little sermon all at once, just because of seeing the verses in my head."
"Hymns are special that way. So many of them are based fully on the Bible. Not that modern music isn't. Some of it is."
"That's okay. I already know you're a snob when it comes to Christian music."
Noah looked a little embarrassed.
"So you must be getting better. Here you are, touching a piano."
"Aunt Vivian has a piano and I can't go near it."
That didn't mean anything necessarily, other than Noah could be right. Maybe she was getting over it. Or maybe it was him.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to dump all my problems on you."
"I asked. I was curious. I knew that you had canceled your last performance, but there's no other information on the Internet at all, and I didn't know." He took a breath and then he continued. "And, just so you don't feel left out, I've been struggling a little bit myself.Not necessarily with music, but my parents died when I was eighteen. All of my siblings are younger than me, and I was the only one who had the option to be the guardian, otherwise they were going to farm us all out to foster homes. So, I gave up my music career to take over the shop and raise my siblings. I've never regretted it, but now that they're all gone, the last one graduated from college, I just feel a little... Not sure what to do. None of them are coming home for Christmas, so that's new, and... I guess I feel like I have an empty nest, and in reality, I don't even have children. I just have siblings."
He looked like he hadn't meant to say all of that, but she'd been listening intently, and he'd continued.
"I can't imagine what it would be like growing up with so many siblings. I was an only child."
"That would've been terrible. Although I guess you would've had all of your parents' attention."
"Yeah." It wasn't quite that way, but she wasn't going to get into that now.
Instead, she read between the lines. "You gave up your music career to raise your siblings."
"I didn't have a music career. I guess I gave up the possibility of one."
"I bet you did a really good job." She looked at him thoughtfully. He just seemed like the protective older brother who would be perfect for that role. Interesting how God worked things out exactly the way they should be. But she could feel the sacrifice Noah had made.
"I don't know about that. They're all pretty much self-sufficient."
"And following the Lord?"
"Yeah. First and foremost. Following God."
"Then you were a success."
They looked at each other, and something seemed to pass between them. Something that she couldn't put a name on, but that felt like an understanding that they both had.
"So I have an idea," Noah said, and he sounded a little hesitant.
"Okay?"
"What if you and I worked together on something small, music-wise."
"What do you mean?" she asked, expecting to feel her chest tighten, but it hadn't. Not yet.
"I mean the kids need someone to help them practice and prepare for the Christmas concert they were planning on giving. I know that the groundwork is laid, but they need us to come in and finish. Do the planning, make sure everything comes together. That type of thing."
