“I don’t know,” I admit, keeping my eyes on the curve of Nina’s neck, remembering how soft her skin feels when I brush my fingers over it. “I know it was a crazy decision, but I couldn’t leave her there. I feel protective of her.”
“Well tell her we would’ve come to the wedding had we known about it and, you know, been invited.”
“I’m sorry, but there was nothing else to be done. Ruby would’ve come after her if I’d waited.”
“She sounds like a real piece of work.”
“Yeah, I might not be able to resist crossing into neutral territory and taking her out.”
“Don’t do anything rash, brother, or at least invite me to the party if you decide to go that route.”
I promise him I will before we say our goodbyes and I pocket my phone. Nina turns to look at me, holding my gaze for a few seconds before looking away again.
“Sorry, I had to take that. It was my brother.”
She turns back to me. “You have a brother?”
“Two actually, both younger. Vladimir, but we all call him Volodya, and Valeri, the youngest. They’re both in Moscow.”
“You must miss them.”
“I do. We’ve always been very close. Maybe they can visit soon. I’d like for them to meet you.”
“You don’t have to do that,” she says. “I appreciate you trying to welcome me in and make me feel at home, but you don’t have to pretend this is something more than it is.”
“Why do you say that?”
She runs a hand through her hair and darts her eyes away, a nervous habit she has when she’s embarrassed. “I can’t be a real wife to you, Vasily. Those men,” she says with a heavy sigh, “they ruined me.”
“They didn’t ruin you,” I tell her, grabbing her hand in mine. “They hurt you deeply, but they didn’t ruin you. You’re not going to give them that.”
“I can’t have sex with you,” she whispers in a shaky voice.
My heart breaks at hearing the pain in her voice, and I wish I knew exactly what to say to make her feel better. Her shoulders start to tremble, and when I pull her in for a hug, she grabs onto me like I’m her lifeline.
“It’s not fair to you, Vasily. I can’t be a normal wife to you. Sex is nothing but pain, and I don’t want anything to do with it, and you deserve a wife who can give you all of themselves, someone who’s not damaged or dirty.”
“Nyet,zolotse,” I quickly say, pulling her into my lap and sitting down in one of the chairs on the balcony. “Don’t even think that.” I kiss her head and ask, “Do you know whatzolotsemeans?”
“Nyet,” she says, making me smile because I love hearing her speak my language even if it is something as simple as the word no.
“It’s similar to darling, but it has a deeper meaning than that. It comes from the word for gold, and the word is used to describe someone who’s precious or valuable, and that’s what you are. There’s nothing damaged or dirty about you.”
I sigh and stroke her hair. “And as far as sex goes, please don’t worry about it. Remember how it was before you went to Ruby’s. You can get that back again.”
She cries harder, and I quickly rehash everything I’ve said, wondering what could’ve triggered this reaction. It occurs to me that she may have had a boyfriend before she was taken, maybe she wanted to get back to him and instead I brought her here and married her.
“Do you have a boyfriend? I’m so sorry. I didn’t even think to ask last night.”
“No.” Her voice is strained from crying.
“What did I say that made you cry?”
Right when I’m convinced she’s not going to answer me, she whispers, “I don’t have a before to compare it to.”
My whole body freezes at her words. “Are you telling me you were a virgin when you went there?”
“Yes.” Her fingers fidget with my shirt. “I wanted to wait until I was in love.” She gives a harsh laugh. “I was such a dumbass.”
