"Before?" He leans forward, and I catch his scent. "You mean three days ago? When you invited me into your apartment and I spent all night learning exactly what makes you?—"
"Stop." The word comes out strangled. I glance at the door, terrified someone might hear. "You can't… There arerules, Blaze."
"Rules." He says it like it's a foreign concept and there’s a playfulness in his eyes.
"Regulations." I set down the tablet because my hands are shaking too badly to hold it. "Civilian medical staff are prohibited from having relationships with active-duty personnel stationed on base. If anyone found out about what happened I could lose my job. I cannot lose my job. So please just let me get through this."
Something shifts in his expression. He’s more serious. "I didn't know about the regulations."
"Well, now you do." I pick up the blood pressure cuff, grateful for something to do with my hands. "So whatever you're thinking, can't happen. It was one night just like I said from the start. That's all it was."
CHAPTER 5
SERENA
He sits back in his chair with an unreadable expression and for a moment, I think the exam is going to be standard. He answers my questions with short, professional responses. It isn’t unkind, but it’s distant in a way that I both demanded and subsequently hate.
Then I reach for his arm. The moment my fingers touch his skin, electricity shoots through every inch of my body. His muscles tense beneath my grip. I hear his breath catch. I pull my hand away and my eyes fly to meet his.
He's watching me with an intensity that steals the air from my lungs. "Is that really what you want? You are okay with this being only one night.”
No. Of course not. Only an insane person would willingly walk away from the best sex of their life.
"Yes." I wrap the cuff around his bicep, and my knuckles brush the edge of his tattoo. I remember tracing that tattoo with my tongue. I remember the sound he made when I did. "I wouldn’t say it’s what I want, but I know it's the only option and I’ve made my peace with it."
"There's always another option." There’s a growl to his words that makes heat pool low in my belly.
"Not for me." I turn the cuff on and watch the numbers instead of his face. "I have responsibilities. People who depend on me. I can't afford to be reckless."
"Being with me would be reckless?"
Being with you would be the end of me.
"Your blood pressure is elevated," I say instead of answering. "One thirty-two over eighty-eight."
"Wonder why." There's a hint of that smile again, tugging at the corner of his mouth.
I want to scream. I want to kiss him. I want to run out of this room and never look back. Instead, I remove the cuff and make a note on his file. "Any injuries or concerns I should know about?"
"Just one." He catches my wrist as I reach for the stethoscope. His grip is gentle but firm. "Broken heart.”
My chest tightens. “Blaze?—"
"I know there are rules. I know this is complicated." His thumb traces a slow circle on my pulse point, and I wonder if he can feel how fast my heart is racing. "But I'm not going to pretend that night didn't mean something. Because it did and we both know it. I’ve never experienced anything like this."
I should pull away. No, I should report him for inappropriate contact. No, that would be crazy given the fact that I practically willed this moment into existence. I should do a hundred things that aren't standing here letting him touch me like I belong to him. But I can’t think of a single one with him this close to me.
"It meant something to me too." The words slip out before I can stop them. They are quiet, fragile, and undeniably true. "But that doesn't change anything."
"It changes everything."
A knock on the door makes us both jump. I yank my hand back just as Maya pokes her head in.
"Serena? Your next appointment is here early."
"I'll be right there." My voice sounds almost normal… I think. "We're just finishing up."
Maya disappears, and I turn back to Blaze. He's standing now. He’s close enough that I can feel the heat radiating off his body.
