“No,” Baikal held his gaze. “He insists you will eventually. When you’re ready.”
“And you’re okay with that?”
“I’m okay with whatever Rabbit is okay with. I trust him with my life. Don’t you trust your Onus?”
Did Flix trust Ani?
What a weighted question.
One he didn’t quite have an answer to.
Chapter 19:
Ani was still pouting when Flix got back, sitting on the center of the bed, back against the headboard, arms wrapped around his upturned knees. He watched Flix with his face partially concealed, eyes tracking him across the room as he entered and removed his multi-slate.
The whole drive here, Flix had been caught up in his thoughts, operating on autopilot, yet now that he was finally with Aneski again, it felt like his mind had emptied.
He settled against the dresser and crossed his arms, staring back at Ani. It hadn’t been long, but he somehow seemed smaller.
“Hey,” he said. “Am I killing your soul?”
Aneski frowned.
“Never mind.” Most of the anger he’d felt toward the younger man had dissipated, but the fear that he would do something rash again was still there. Baikal had made it sound like this relationship wouldn’t work if Flix didn’t somehow develop trust in Ani, but—
Relationship.
What the hell?
“You’re my Onus, but we aren’t dating. We fuck, but that isn’t love.” He tipped his head. “What are we, Ani?”
He sighed sadly. “Broken.”
“Broken, huh?” Flix licked his lips and forced himself to ask, “Any chance we can be fixed, do you think?” A lifetime of this seemed…exhausting. That’s not what he wanted. He wanted…
He’d never really thought about it. Up until now, Flix had been content pining for Aneski from afar. When it got too much, he’d find a warm body to screw. An Onus had never even occurred to him, considering he couldn’t imagine choosing someone to share forever with without telling them about his powers. Letting anyone in on that particular secret would have been too dangerous.
Except there was a very good chance that Rabbit already knew all about it. Flix couldn’t figure out how, was pretty sure he’d been as careful as ever, especially around Baikal’s boyfriend. There was nothing else worth mentioning that he was keeping, however, which meant the big secret Rabbit had alluded tohadto be this.
Flix was going to have to tell Baikal, and in the off chance things didn’t go as swimmingly as Rabbit clearly believed they would, having Ani able to run away on his own two feet at any given notice would be ideal.
“Flix…” Aneski eyed him suspiciously. “Don’t mess with me right now, please.”
He slowly made his way over to the side of the bed where the chain was secured to the wall. “Just the room. We’ll start small until you prove you can be trusted.”
Flix could manage that much, could control his anxiety to that extent. His fingers went to the collar and he pressed his thumb against the hidden censor, holding Ani’s gaze all the while. When it clicked and fell away, he caught it, placing it pointedly on the end table before straightening.
Aneski tentatively rubbed at his throat, eyes wide. “Really? You aren’t just—”
“Go shower,” he instructed, motioning with his chin toward the bathroom door across the room. Only Ani hesitated. “What’s wrong?” He wasn’t already going to argue that it wasn’t enough, was he? If he did, Flix didn’t think he could contain his anger.
He should have leached before coming in here to be safe, had been too caught up in his head to think about it.
“You just got here,” Aneski said, his voice quivering slightly.
“Yeah?” Oh. The last time Flix had told him to shower, he’d walked out on him during. Dropping down onto the bed at his side, Flix ran a hand through Ani’s hair and pulled him in for a light kiss before shoving him playfully away. “Relax, baby. I’m just sending you in first. I’ll join you in a minute. You’re my Onus now, remember? It’s not like before.”
“That’s not as big of a comfort as you make it seem,” Ani surprised him by saying. “I might have the title, but that doesn’t mean anything. You won’t show me around or even tell all of your friends about us. I’m a secret, and secrets can remain locked up in big houses alone.”
