There was still Jones to consider, and his new job at the coffee shop. Kaz had already wrecked his place at Quartet Air. Nate’s bank account couldn’t handle losing more work. He needed that time to get his resume in order and send it to potential shops. Right now, to achieve that, the most important goal at this moment would be to get Kaz off his back—both literally and figuratively.
“Oh, fucking is going to be a part of the deal no matter what,” Kazimir corrected. “I like it too much. Like the feel of you under and around me. The broken sounds you make and the way your insides tense and grip me despite the way you keep saying you don’t want it. You want it. You’re just confused why.”
Did he want it? Nate couldn’t think straight. Maybe he did. He was still hard, after all. His dick still responded, and Kaz was also right about the rest of him. His hole cinched around that thick cock with every outward stroke, as if he was trying to keep him buried deep.
Since this was his first experience with it, maybe rough sex was actually enjoyable for him. Maybe this was somethinghe would have been into if given the chance to explore it with someone else…
Or maybe the Devil was getting to him and putting bullshit in his head.
Nate didn’tfeelgood right now, so didn’t that mean he felt bad? Could a person both love and hate something at the same time?
“You want me to explain it for you, Pretty Boy? Why you actually like it even when you consciously think you don’t?” Kazimir tucked his chin against the curve of Nate’s shoulder. “It’s because this is simple. There’s nothing you have to do, no reason for you to overthink or worry. You can’t do anything wrong here because I’m the one in control. There’s no chance of you burdening me because you’re doing exactly what I want you to do exactly when I want you to do it.”
“That’s…” That made him sound like a hot mess in every other aspect of his life but…The more he considered the truth of that matter, the clearer it seemed to be. Nate did overthinkevery little thing. If he didn’t, he could end up making a mistake that bothered someone else. Everyone in the universe was dealing with their own crap. They didn’t need Nate’s garbage piled on top of theirs.
“It’s not that you’re a nice guy,” Kaz said. “It’s that you hate the idea of letting anyone down. Being the cause of their negative feelings.”
“What? No, Iama nice guy.” Nate was sure of it. Even if the rest of that couldn’t be disproven.
“Then why won’t you help me out?” he asked. “I needed you to be my boyfriend, but you said no. You were really mean about it, too. Rejection isn’t nice, Nate.”
Okay, that definitely was straight-up manipulation. The sex part of the equation was confusing, but Nate knew who he was at his core, and it would take a lot more than a dozen forcedorgasms and a single hot—even if it was as hot as Kaz—body to shake him in that department.
“You’re twisting it. Turning someone down has nothing to do with being a good person or not. Sometimes, they’re just not interested in you. Stop trying to villainize me. Stop trying to convince me I did something wrong.” He hadn’t.
Work hard, treat people right, and good things will come to you. That’s what his brother had taught them growing up, and Nate had done his hardest to follow those guidelines.
If this was the good, however, he could have done without.
Kaz sighed. “True, we both know who the real villain is here. I guess I haven’t worn you down enough. Okay. We’ll keep going and—”
“No, wait!” Nate tried to wiggle his hands, but they were trapped between the two of them.
“That tickles,” Kaz said lightly, relaxed. He started to flick his hips in shallow motions, just enough to jostle the mattress beneath them.
“Kazimir.” Nate flinched as his prostate was tapped against over and over again for the millionth time. If he had to guess, he’d say he’d made up for his lack of sexual experience with men enough to last a lifetime. “Please.”
“I gave you a breather,” he pointed out. “What you did with it was your choice. Don’t blame me.”
“You are literally the only one who can be blamed here!” Nate snapped back, frustrated. He growled and twisted his head to bury it against the soft material of the pillow, finding it soaked with his sweat and tears.
Kaz had talked him into circles on purpose, distracted him and tested him all at the same time. He’d wanted to see how close to the edge Nate was, whether or not he’d give in.
Vaguely, Nate wondered if the Brumal had taught him this kind of torture method, but the idea of Kazimir doing this to anyone else oddly didn’t sit right with him and he cut the thought short before it could ruminate any further. He didn’t want to overanalyze his feelings, not unless they were ones of desperation.
Which he was. Nate was desperate to get this to stop. To be able to breathe and not feel so much stimulation all over.
“Boyfriend,” he mumbled the word into the material of the pillow, but somehow Kaz heard him, his movements slowing before coming to a stop. The silence at his back was clue enough that he was waiting, so Nate forced himself to turn his head again, glazed-over eyes staring across the room at the open bedroom door.
Thank Light Neve no longer lived here and there was no fear of her walking in, witnessing this, and being scarred for life.
“I want to be your boyfriend,” Nate gave in with an edge of resignation.
Nothing was ever that simple with Kazimir though.
“Why should I agree to that, Pretty Boy?” He pulled out and rolled Nate onto his back, spreading his legs and tugging him so the backs of Nate’s thighs were resting on top of his own. His expression was dark as he sat there and stared down at him, a wicked glint in that garnet gaze, his mouth upturned ever so slightly. “I could just keep fucking you like this and go find someone else to play the part. That’s what you suggested, wasn’t it? There’s always Zane. I’m sure he’d play along with the right…motivation.”
Who the hell was Zane? Nate almost asked, catching himself at the last second.
