“Okay…So go,” Nate made a shooing motion toward the door, “do that. You certainly aren’t going to find happiness here, with me.”
“I’m guessing that’s what Rabbit said in the beginning, too.” Kazimir smirked. “I knew you were the perfect candidate.”
“For what?” Did he even want to know? Nate was pretty sure the answer was he did not.
“I told you. I’m here to buy you, Pretty Boy.” He snorted when Nate made a face of disgust. “Don’t act so high and mighty. I saw you with Mit Parker the other night. It’s obvious the types of things you get into when you aren’t here getting covered in grease.”
“I was too wasted the other night to properly covey this, so let me try now.” Nate straightened to his full height. “I think you’re disgusting and I want nothing to do with you.”
“Sure you’re not just mad at yourself?” Kaz suggested. “Mad that, ultimately, you’re the reason that happened to you in the first place. You made yourself vulnerable to predators the second you started drinking to access.”
“You raped me!” Nate hissed, lowering his voice at the last second. “And now you’re trying to say it’s my fault?”
“You gave in eventually,” he shrugged.
“That’s…” Nate was at a loss for words. “You’re insane.”
“You keep saying. Luckily for you, I don’t bruise easily, and I won’t take the name-calling out on your ass the next time Ibend you over. There’s some more generosity for you. Make sure you’re taking notes.”
“I’m never having sex with you again.”
“You didn’t think you’d have it with me the first time either.”
Nate stilled. “Are you actually telling me right now that you intend to force me—”
“To take my cock?” Kazimir cut him off. “Yeah. Yeah, that’s exactly what I’m saying. So, be good for me and give in, just like you did that night. Didn’t it feel better once you had? Once you were moaning and riding me—”
Nate swung before he could help it, his fist connecting with the side of Kazimir’s face with a loud sound. His hand instantly exploded in pain, but aside from the slight hiss of breath, he kept that to himself and immediately retreated a couple of steps.
His electricity bill was two weeks late and if he didn’t get his paycheck Friday he was going to be royally screwed, but suddenly that fear was a distant memory in the face of the furious Devil who was now staring daggers at him. For the first time in a long time, Nate also didn’t have that tiny voice screaming at him internally, telling him how big of a burden he’d be if he acted out like this. Right now, that voice was actually quiet.
Maybe it shouldn’t have been.
Maybe then he would have been smart enough to apologize and run, instead of doing what he did next.
“You’re wrong,” he stated. “I didn’t enjoy a single thing about that night. I don’t trade my body and I don’t hate myself. Not sure where you got that impression,” he’d probably said something at the bar, but that was neither here nor there, “but you’re wrong.”
“That so?” Kazimir rubbed at his split lip, glancing down at the spec of red he wiped off onto the pad of his thumb.
“Yeah,” Nate said.
“If it isn’t self-loathing, what is it?” Kazimir tilted his head in thought, eyeing Nate down like he could see beneath his skin at his insides. “You do seem rather confident, not typically a trait in someone who hates themselves, even secretly…But it’s something similar because you wouldn’t have wallowed so pathetically after drinking…. I can tell that you’ve been thinking about me, how much you hate that you enjoyed—lie all you want, baby, I know you did. I was there, remember?”
Some sick part of Nate had enjoyed it, but that didn’t matter. “Whether I got off in the end or not doesn’t change anything.”
“Sure it does,” he corrected. “It changes how you view the interaction as a whole. Because I made you come, you feel pathetic. Because you feel pathetic, you’ve been thinking about it.”
“The only pathetic one here is you,” Nate snapped. “I don’t have to force people to sleep with me.”
“I don’t usually either,” Kaz said.
“Then why did you?” he tried to keep the hint of confusion out of his tone but failed.
“It wasn’t about sex. It was about control. It was about tearing you down and feeding your self-loathing. Only, now you’re saying that you don’t actually have that affliction. I’m not usually wrong about these things.”
“You don’t usually fuck people against their will and can usually read their minds, that it? Sounds like a load of bullshit to me. News flash, I didn’t sign up to be your freaky firsts. I’m not some experiment you can get your kicks off to. I’m not interested.”
“If I tied you up right now, I bet I could get you interested. Your body, anyway.”
