“Yes. My sister has cleaned many a blood stain out of my proverbial carpets. As long as I don’t do anything that could cause a political scandal or start a war with another planet, they don’t care what I do or who I hurt. Does that make you upset?”
Rin thought it over. “It should, but no.”
“Even though you’re capable of feeling empathy?”
“I can feel it,” he confirmed. “But I have my own problems to deal with. I’m a bit selfish too, so it seems. We’re a pair.”
“And your brother?” Kelevra hedged.
A shutter came down over Rin’s eyes. “My brother is the most important person to me in the entire universe and that isn’t going to change.”
“Relax, Consort, that wasn’t a threat.” Although, he was now determined to make it his mission to out-seat Sila as Rin’s number one priority. “I’ve had one taken. I wouldn’t take yours.”
“I know we’re weird. That we’re…too codependent by normal standards. But it is what it is. We’re a package deal, Kelevra.”
“I have no interest in fucking your brother.” Kel got a bad taste in his mouth just thinking about it. Ironic, considering how similar they were in appearance. But Sila was nothing like Rin, and how people struggled to tell them apart was beyond him.
“If you ever did, I would drown you both,” Rin replied. “I only mean, where he goes, I go, and vice versa. If he’s harmed, I’m harmed. We’ve only ever had each other. Call us unhealthily codependent, it’s true, but it is what it is and I wouldn’t change it any more than you’d change yourself. I won’t change it. You want anything else from me, I’ll do my best to give it. But I won’t do that. I won’t lose my brother, and I won’t stand around and watch anything bad happen to him either.”
“I have no intention of harming him,” Kelevra reassured. “But I do want you to start adjusting your mindset. Include me, sweetheart. In your plans, in your hopes. I’m part of your future. You have me now, and I’m not going anywhere either.”
He could tell it was going to take more time for Rin to fully believe him and open up all the way, but this was progress.
And Kelevra Diar, the man known for his impulsive nature, was discovering that maybe he wasn’t entirely as impatient as once believed. For Rin? He could wait.
Chapter 26:
Rin slept most of the next day. He’d rouse every couple of hours and sometimes Kelevra would be there to whisper nonsense at him and muss up his hair, but other times he’d be alone. Kel never tried to get him out of bed, and he didn’t try to wake him with sex the way he had the last time Rin had spent the night.
When he finally forced his eyes open and felt rested enough, the clock on his emblem-slate said it was nearing two in the afternoon. He rubbed at his face as he sat up, glancing around the room to find he was alone. Half of him expected his body to ache when he climbed out of bed, but it was the opposite. He felt…Pretty good.
Actually, he couldn’t recall the last time he’d felt this relaxed. Even the anger he’d been anticipating was minimal, enough for him to feel properly affronted for everything that had been done to him against his will, but nowhere near catastrophic levels.
Neither of them would ever speak of it, but unlike his brother, Rin had struggled more and more with maintaining his own sense of self over the past few years. That was a large part of the reason his brother had pushed for this plan in the first place, bringing them far enough from their father and the people they’d grown up around so they could be free to develop separately from one another.
They’d managed to go an entire year without switching places, and while his brother had flourished, Rin had still struggled. It’d been better, but he’d been reserved, more interested in learning this new planet and how to best control himself in this environment. Basically, he’d kept up with the act despite not having to.
He’d thought he could use this year to make progress in the personal growth department, then this situation with Kelevra had happened and…
Rin walked into the bathroom and rested his palms against the edge of the sink, staring at his reflection in the large mirror. His hair was a mess, his cheeks still red, and there were love bites on the side of his neck and peppered all over his chest. He pressed at one, the spot tender to the touch, but the pain only helped clear his mind even more.
He looked used.
And happy.
His brother had never come out of the bedroom covered like this. Looking like this. It wasn’t their only difference, logically he knew that, but right now seeing himself helped drive that home for Rin.
All he’d ever wanted was to be free. Free from his father and those damn expectations, and free from himself and the impossible ones he set. He didn’t want to hide who he was anymore. Maybe…maybe his brother was right. Maybe this was a good thing and he’d just been too stubborn and angry to see it.
What if marrying Kelevra Diar was exactly what Rin needed? He felt more real standing here—more himself—than he ever had before.
They’d never swapped bed partners, but his brother and he had always informed the other who they’d slept with to avoid any misunderstandings or confusion. If they traded places but seemed like they’d forgotten a wild night with someone, it’d hurt feelings and turn into a topic of discussion. Their whole goal had been to stay out of the limelight, so that wouldn’t have worked. His brother was also an extremely possessive person. Even if it was a one-night stand, he refused to share the same body with him. Considering their tastes in both people and sexual proclivities had always been vastly different, Rin had never shown an interest in one of his brother’s playmates anyway.
But even after the fact, if they switched places the next day, whoever they’d slept with the night before was always none the wiser. Whether they’d been inside of him or had his brother inside of them, they could never tell the difference. To the entire universe, Rin and Sila were one and the same if they chose to play the parts.
Except with Kelevra.
The Imperial Prince would always be able to tell them apart, be it in or out of the bedroom. Over time, Rin had found himself dropping more and more of the guise when he was with him as well, unafraid of poking and insulting him. Sometimes Kel still scared him sure—only a fool wouldn’t acknowledge the insanely uneven power dynamics between them—yet on some level, he knew Kelevra didn’t plan on hurting him.
