I tugged my hands free from her gentle grip, the ugly feeling of resentment tightening my chest once again.
“And I did spare him, didn’t I? I honored your wishes, and somehow, I ended up being the one who was tormented again. He touched you, Nora. And you welcomed it. You asked me to share you with him after everything he’s done to me. To you.”
Her eyes began to shine. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. And it wasn’t meant to be a betrayal. I love you, but I can’t bear to cause Dante any more pain.”
I flexed my fists to stave off some of my rage. “There’s a difference between not causing him pain and begging him to fuck you.”
A tear spilled down her cheek. “Do you hate me now?” she whispered tremulously. “I know I asked a lot of you, but you could’ve refused. I thought you enjoyed it too. If I’d thought you were unwilling, I wouldn’t have continued. I’ll never violate you like that. I… I’m sorry, Luca.”
Something cracked inside my chest, and my arms were around her before I could think, soothing her. “I don’t hate you,” I swore. “I could never hate you. But I’m afraid…” I took a breath and forced the truth out into the open. “I’m afraid that you’ll come to love him, too, and I don’t know if I’m capable of sharing your heart. Not with anyone, but especially not with him.”
She buried her face in my chest, and her tears wet my shirt. “I do care about Dante, but I love you, Luca. Nothing will change that.”
Selfish bastard. Dante’s accusation rang through my mind. He’d claimed that I didn’t deserve Nora because I always put my own desires first. I was trying to be worthy of her, but my possessiveness and jealousy were impossible to deny. I knew I owed it to her to give her what she needed. I’d kidnapped her and forced her to marry me. I’d taken her virginity on our wedding night to sate my own desires. And I’d only wanted her happiness because that would make my life more pleasant.
That was all before I’d fallen in love with her, but I’d treated her inexcusably.
I’d been so focused on securing my birthright that I’d used her as a pawn without any concern for her feelings, her autonomy.
Was I much better than Dante when it came to our sins against her?
By some miracle, this strong, compassionate woman had found it in her heart to forgive both of us. To care for both of us.
Her promise of love would have to be enough to sustain me. If she had feelings for Dante, I’d have to find a way to live with it.
And a traitorous, quiet voice snaked through my mind, telling me that I’d secretly enjoyed every deviant moment of the fucked-up sex we’d shared last night. I might hate watching Dante touch my wife, but her reactions to his crueler forms of seduction got me hot. She’d surrendered so beautifully, so completely. She was stunning in her agonized, ecstatic submission.
I didn’t know if I could bear to share her heart, but I could try sharing her body, if that was what she wanted. She’d been so broken after the Russians had brutalized her. Despite my resentment, I couldn’t deny that Dante had known how to put her back together again. If she needed him on some level, I wouldn’t allow my selfishness to cause her one more ounce of suffering.
I still loathed Dante, but for Nora, I would try to suppress my most murderous impulses.
Chapter 14
Nora
When Dante finally returned to us that evening, Luca shocked me to my core.
My husband extricated himself from my arms and stood to face Dante, his hulking body swelling with tension that I feared might turn violent. I was instantly on my feet, placing a restraining hand on his shoulder.
He glanced down at me. “It’s all right, Nora. I have something I want to say.”
Drawing himself up to his full, impressive height, he faced Dante with something like grim determination. “Nora wants you,” he said tightly. “I will try to allow you to touch her without wanting to kill you. For her.”
“Luca,” I breathed, stunned and more than a little hesitant. “You don’t have to do this.”
After our fraught conversation earlier, I wasn’t going to push him further. I hadn’t decided how I was going to deal with my growing feelings for Dante when I was deeply in love with my husband, but I’d reasoned that I couldn’t hurt Luca.
He turned to me, eyes shining with desperate desire. “I’ve been selfish, Nora. So fucking selfish. I’ll prove that I can be worthy of you. From now on, I’ll always put you first.”
I caressed his stubble-roughened cheek. “Putting me first doesn’t mean that I’ll allow you to torment yourself. You said that what we did last night hurt you. If I’d realized?—”
“Seeing you submit so completely was the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever experienced,” he rumbled. “My feelings about this situation are complicated. I still hate him. But I love you more.”
I stared up into his eyes, willing him to see the truth in my heart. “Nothing will ever come between us,” I swore. “Nothing will change the way I feel about you. And that fact that you’re willing to try for my sake…” I swallowed hard, staving off a rush of emotion. “It makes me love you even more.”
Hesitantly, I turned to face Dante, who hadn’t said a word in response to Luca’s proposition.
“Are you willing to share me too?” I asked, scarcely able to breathe for fear of rejection.
