He would let me be born anew, as something less… shattered.
I turned in his arms as soon as the door closed and came up on tiptoes to press my mouth to his. He didn’t fight it, opening up and giving me access. He drank down the sob that tore from my lips, his arms coming around my waist to pull me close to him.
“I hate you.” I whispered against his mouth when I finally pulled back, and the soft upturn of his smile was proof that he heard what I was actually saying. “I hate the way you make me feel so… whole.” I said the word like it was something dirty, something I shouldn’t be willing to admit. “I hate that I’ve wanted you since before I knew you.”
My fingers tangled in his hair as I kept on with my confession, dragging his mouth back to mine so I could kiss him again.
“I hate that you’re so patient with me, that you look at all my broken pieces and you still see a man.”
So much… I hated him so much.
“You can hate me as much as you need.” He murmured the promise against my lips. “For the rest of forever. As long as you’re with me.”
My head dropped to his shoulder, and I couldn’t stop the tears from falling down my cheeks. “I hate that you see me, Sephtis. That you really see me, even though I feel like I can’t see myself anymore.”
Hate.
Hate wasn’t what made me lift my head so I could press my lips against his, and it wasn’t hate that made me wrap my arm around his waist so I could drag him back to the bed. I didn’t understand why I needed to feel close to him, to feel overwhelmed by his touch, by his taste.
I didn’t know why the most vulnerable parts of me seemed to crave him after tragedy, and it didn’t matter.
Because I knew one thing.
As much as I said it, as much as I wanted to mean it.
What I felt wasn’t hate at all.
Chapter 28
Sephtis
He looked sosoft when he slept, unbothered by the things that weighed so heavily on him when his eyes were open. Looking at Cole when he wasn’t having nightmares, watching him sleep when he was soft and open… It was one of the most beautiful things I’d ever seen.
I hadn’t expected his reaction to seeing a man die—I hadn’t expected him to be so broken open and vulnerable after.
I hadn’t meant to leave him shattered and aching for me to fill up all the pieces and lies he’d built up around himself, to make what had happened to Caiden something he could cope with.
I’d just wanted to help him understand, to let him see that everything wasn’t as terrible as he assumed.
Instead, he’d blossomed beneath me like a flower and begged me to keep him held together, and I knew there was no world where I’d ever had another choice.
And now…
Now I couldn’t resist leaning down and pressing my lips to his, even though I knew he was going to wake from the touch.
Sure enough, his arm came up and slid around my neck, and he opened his mouth to the kiss with the sweetest sigh. When hislids fluttered open and he looked up at me, there was something different about his expression.
Some depth I hadn’t seen before. Some vulnerability I’d never expected when it came to the way he glared at me.
“Mmm… is it still early?”
My eyes flicked to the window—still dark, though I could see the faintest edges of the sun.
“Yes.”
His lashes fluttered like he was making up his mind, and he nodded, pushing up on the bed before dropping his head to my shoulder.
“Can I show you something?”
