But shining beneath all of it waslove.
It was love that had drawn me into Caiden’s room that night—his love for his brother. The strange knowledge he’d had that I would be there after.
What I’d felt for him had been a faint echo of the feelings I had for Cole, so sharp it was impossible to ignore, so deep it was a wonder I didn’t drown in them.
Seconds stretched between us, thick with unspoken words and impossible things I couldn’t blame him for not understanding. He was a human, and the concept of Reapers, of soulmates, of love that he had no control over was suddenly being thrust onto him.
A red thread between us meant we were destined for one another—it didn’t mean he had to accept that destiny with open arms.
He swayed forward, his lips parting as he looked at me… then, just as quickly, he shoved away. I let him go, reluctantly, and his eyes narrowed.
“You’re full of shit,” he finally said, his voice a little thicker than it had been before, full of emotion that wasn’t hate at all. Itwas a deep-reaching pain that wrapped around the accusation, made it sting my skin with shards of ice instead of fire. It wasn’t just hate.
It was guilt.
He was still guilty that he hadn’t been there.
“I don’t think I could lie to you, even if I wanted to.” The confession came easily from my tongue. I wasn’t sure if he understood that I’d give him anything, tell him anything, to make him happy.
As much as I could feel his hate and anger burning along every inch of my skin, my need for him was stronger. It ran deeper than duty or desire, than want and hate and self-preservation.
I needed to be with him the same way humans needed air.
Which was why his next words made a low sound catch in my chest.
“Get out.” He said it as he walked away, and I lingered there in the living room of his apartment. Was there ever going to be a time I could actually give Cole what he asked for?
“I can’t.”
He froze, and I watched the tension crawl along his spine to tighten in his shoulders. Just as quickly as it came, it disappeared. I wasn’t sure if the fact that he’d died was finally catching up to him, or if what I’d said penetrated deeper than he’d wanted to admit.
“Why? Why can’t you just leave me alone?”
There were so many answers, but I wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear any of them. I couldn’t leave him alone because, since the moment I’d seen him, he was all I could think about. I couldn’t leave him alone because whatever soul Death had used to breathe me into existence, as broken and fragmented as it was, it had always been destined for his.
I couldn’t leave him alone because the only thing I wanted was to make sure he was safe, even if that meant he hated me.
“The sound you heard earlier? The howling? Those were soul hounds. They can smell it when someone messes with destiny, when they evade Death’s grasp. I’m hoping they were so caught up on the Enmity that they don’t realize it was you who actually drew them there. But…”
He turned as I trailed off, and his eyes were tired. I wasn’t even sure if he noticed when his arms crossed over his waist, how delicate and fragile it made him look. How broken.
“Enmity?”
Gods, it was strange to think he knew nothing about my world, nothing about the world that existed all around him that he’d never known about until I’d pulled him into it.
“The thing that attacked us. It was a creature attracted to…” My eyes flicked to his chest, to his fist. I’d felt it when he hit me, but I’d hoped the motion might make him feel better. Obviously, it hadn’t helped at all. “They’re drawn to souls so consumed with anger and hate that they’re vulnerable to being devoured.”
I’d worried when he’d been clawed that he’d been infected, but he was fine. There was no darkness spilling from his wounds. Maybe the Vitality had been so pure that it burned away those shadows. I didn’t know. I’d never seen a human consume an entire soul’s worth of someone else’s strength.
“It makes sense it was after me, then.” He looked at me when he said it, the accusation naked on his face, stinging in the air between us. “And the howling was… hounds?”
“They’re Death’s pets. They fetch souls who were supposed to pass on but found a way to stay. They occasionally come to clean up the mess the Enmity leaves behind when they die.”
Cole looked at me, his brows drawing together… and then he shook his head and turned.
“You know what? I’m going to bed. This is all fucked up. Stay or go… it’s obvious you’re going to do what you want, no matter what I say. Just…” He paused at his door, and his hands clenched into fists. “Stop fucking up my life, Sephtis. I don’t care about a stupid red thread, or what you think you know. I don’t want any of this.”
He slammed the door behind him, and it felt like someone cut the strings holding me together. I took a few steps away and dropped onto his couch.
