I give my head a shake. This is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for my entire career. Taking over Dr. Madsen’s lab has been my goal since I knew what it was. There’s no other research facility like it in the field of neuroscience.
There’s no way I can turn down this kind of opportunity. Is there?
“Yes, um, I’m sure I can make that happen, Dennis. I’ll just need to confirm a couple of things first.” I clear my throat. “This is an incredible opportunity, Dennis. I’m… I’m so honored. Thank you so much. It means so much to me.”
His voice is warm and kind. “I know it does, son. I know you’ll do great work here. There is no one else I’d be so comfortable leaving my research to. And I’ll be around a while longer. I’m sure I won’t be able to ditch the life completely. Rosemary knows that too.” He chuckles. “But now it will be you catching me up on all the cutting-edge discoveries, not the other way around. I can’t wait to see what you’ll accomplish here.”
We end the call with him promising to send me some documents I need to fill out so he can officially nominate me to the university chancellor before the upcoming meeting. It should be straightforward since I’m a former student, and according to Dennis, there’s no one he’s working with right now who wants to take his place, as they’re all heads down in their own research. It means I should be able to transition smoothly into the role, which is great. But… fuck.Why am I not happy about this? And more importantly, what the hell am I going to do about Aleks?
Chapter 20
ALEKS
Walkingintotheofficesadjacent to the Sasquatch’s rink on Monday morning, I still feel like I’m walking on air. Even with Josie’s accident, this turned into one of the best weekends of my entire life. The three of us had such an amazing time yesterday after we brought Jo back to my place from the hospital. Even though she was tired and still feeling pretty shitty, we had her laughing, and she and Ben got along perfectly. I haven’t had a chance to talk with her alone since Ben and I were, um, otherwise occupied for the rest of the evening after we got her settled at home, but my plan is to drop in on her after work today.
After a productive morning and lunch with some of the equipment techs, I find some time to speak with Carson, needing to touch base on the helmet project and also wanting to thank him in person for pushing all my team benefits through so quickly. Josie was super appreciative when I told her the team had offered to cover all her home care costs and anything else she needs. Jo does okay with money—she has a healthy inheritance from her grandmother, plus her own job—but because of her terrible upbringing, she’s very cautious. Honestly, I can’t blame her. This gesture from the team means she won’t have to fight with her insurance company to get the expenses like home nursing care covered, which is a huge load off her shoulders. It means even more since, legally speaking, we’re not technically “family,” but Carson worked some magic to get her covered underneath my plan.
After waving hello to Kelly, who’s on the phone, I make my way down the hall to his office. It’s unusual for a team’s GM to have such an open-door policy, but Carson is always saying to drop in anytime. He even made that clear to those of us working for the EC Eagles, which says a lot about the kind of manager he is.
His door is slightly ajar, and as I get closer, I hear Carson speaking and another voice that sounds suspiciously like my dad, which is odd. I can’t think of any reason for him to be here. I didn’t even know they knew each other. I mean, Dad knows all the GMs in the league, but he doesn’t usually make a habit of dropping in for visits.
I’m about to poke my head into the office to see what’s going on when Dad says something that makes me freeze in my tracks, my stomach dropping.
“Look, Carson, I can see why you’d want to be first out of the gate with this kind of thing. I mean, talking about player safety is all the rage these days, I get it. But do you honestly think it’s smart to mess with equipment midseason, especially when you guys are poised to make a playoff run? I mean, for god’s sake, you’re a first-year team—there’s no damn way you should even be close to making the playoffs, let alone be sitting at the top of the division in December! It’s fucking crazy, and if you want my advice, you absolutely can’t take any chances on fucking that up.”
“I hear what you’re saying, Kent,” Carson says. “And I appreciate your input, but we want to be on the cutting edge of player safety here at the Sasquatch. We’re not planning to force any player to wear the new helmet if they’re not comfortable, but so far, everyone is on board.”
I can see the outline of my dad through the frosted glass windows of the office. He’s sitting in one of the chairs on the other side of Carson’s desk, his leg bouncing the way it often does when he’s anxious.
“Look, Carson, I’m gonna be straight with you here. This is a mistake,” my dad says, and my jaw drops. I can’t believe what I’m hearing. I mean, I know my dad thinks CTE is unrelated to hits from hockey, but what possible reason would he have for trying to stop the Sasquatch from participating in this initiative? Especially when he knows this is my project. It’s important to me, to the success of my career.What the hell is happening here?
From where I’m standing, I can only see a small sliver of the room, and I know I should get the hell out of here. I’m eavesdropping on a conversation I’m obviously not meant to hear, but I’m rooted to my spot. Suddenly, Dad gets up from his chair, and his fuzzy outline paces back and forth in front of the desk. With his chair empty, I can see a second person sitting in the other chair, and I have to stifle my gasp because it’s Ben.
“Trust me on this,” my dad is saying, his voice rapidly reaching an uncomfortable decibel level. “You don’t want to rock the boat. A stupid helmet isn’t going to stop concussions anyway. The game moves too fast. Protection can improve, but injuries are still going to happen. Trust me, you put some shiny new helmet on those veterans, and you’ll have a rebellion of the old guard on your hands.”
“Kent, with all due respect, this initiative isn’t about the old guard. It’s about keeping all our players as safe as possible,” Carson says. “It’s also about the future, and even keeping kids who play the game safe so their parents will let them play hockey and other contact sports.” His voice is calm and measured, but it doesn’t seem to be having any effect on my dad, who is clearly getting more and more angry.
Suddenly, Dad whirls around so he’s facing Ben, his back to me. The tension in his shoulders is obvious, even through the frosted glass. “And then there’syou!” he shouts. “How the fuck do you know anything? Have you ever played pro hockey? Taken a hit so hard you see stars and then bounced back up and kept playing because it’s important? Becausewinning fucking matters, and you’re there for the men on your team? Huh? Have you? I fuckin’ doubt it. The only thing you’re doing with this so-called ‘safety initiative’ is putting bullshit ideas in my son’s head that the sport is ‘dangerous.’ You’re making him lose respect for his old man and the game that gave him a very comfortable life. And do you know how I was able to give him that life? By being the meanest, toughest fucker out there, scrapping every fucking night. But you and your kind have been turning all our young men against that kind of life, making all of them believe they’re too good to play that kind of game, that they’re above all that, when the truth is you’re all just using them. You’re using Aleks and all the other young guys out there so you and your lab coat buddies can get your names in the news or in some fancy medical journal.” He pauses for breath before continuing, and I can picture the enraged look on his face; I’ve seen it many times when he gets going on a rant. But what comes out of his mouth is something I haven’t heard before, and it cuts me to the quick.
“Look, Aleks is so fuckin’ desperate for a way into management in this league he’ll latch onto any crazy idea if he thinks it will attract attention. He can’t see that this is all a waste of money and resources. Aleks is a good kid, but he’s too idealistic—his head’s in the fuckin clouds. He can’t see this so-called research of yours trying to link hockey and brain damage is just hogwash. You’re all just a bunch of damn lab coats trying to vilify hockey. There’s no solid proof of what you’re saying, and in the meantime, you’re destroying the legacies of generations of guys who shed blood, sweat, and teeth on the ice purely for the love of the game and the love of their teammates. It’s all just bullshit.” My dad is panting. Meanwhile, I feel like I’ve been stabbed by someone who should be my biggest supporter.
“Kent, I’m only going to say this once,” Ben says in a tone I’ve never heard from him. His voice cuts like a blade, and frankly, it’s a little bit scary and a whole lot of hot. “I care about your son, and I refuse to listen to you talk down about him. Aleks is smart as hell, and while he might have high ideals, he is not naïve. He’s not going to have any problem making it in this league—you don’t need to worry about that. The condescending way you’re talking about him right now is the only bullshit I can detect in this office. You’d better give your head a shake, Kent, and start treating your son with the respect he deserves because if you don’t, your precious legacy as a hockey player won’t be the only thing you’ll lose in this battle.”
“Now, listen here—” my dad says, but Ben cuts him off, andho-lee shitballs, the way he’s standing up to my dad and defending me is making me all hot and bothered.Is that weird?
“Excuse me, I’m not finished yet,” Ben says, and I nearly swoon. “As for your feelings about my research, you’re entitled to your opinion, but you don’t get to come into this office and insult me, my research team, Carson, and least of all your son.” He clears his throat before continuing, and I’m pretty sure the only reason my dad isn’t losing his shit right now is because he’s so surprised at the way Ben is standing up to him. “Now, in response to your question about whether I’ve played pro hockey, the answer, as you’re aware, is no, I have not. However, it seems like you may not know that Idohaveverypersonal experience with life as a hockey player, and I knowexactlywhat kind of damage it can do to another person. My stepfather is Bob Prescott.”
Dad gasps, and the room is silent. I’m confused though. I’m sure Dad knows who Bob Prescott is, since they played at the same time, but I don’t understand why Ben brought up his stepdad’s name like he’s some kind of weapon.
The next person to speak is my father, and his voice is shaky. “I… I didn’t realize Bob was your stepfather. Does… does Aleks know?” Now I’m really even more confused.Do I know what? And why does Dad sound so shaken up?
“I’ve mentioned who my dad is, but I don’t think Aleks realizes the… connection… you two have,” Ben says.
The room goes silent again, and I can hear my father breathing heavily.What in the hell is he so upset about? What is this connection he has to Ben’s stepfather?
Carson speaks next, and his voice is gentle but firm. “Look, gentlemen, I think we’ve gotten off track here. Kent, I know it’s probably not easy to watch the game you love change so dramatically, but if we don’t move forward, we’re going to become extinct. I get that maybe it’s not the perfect time to run a project of this nature, given that we’re doing so much better as a first-year team than anyone could have predicted. I’ll discuss it again with the coaching staff to make sure they’re still on board because those concerns are valid. But regardless of when it happens, this initiative is going ahead, Kent.”
There’s another pause, and I realize I’m still standing outside Carson’s office, eavesdropping like a creeper. I turn to tiptoe back down the hall, but before I’m out of earshot, I hear Carson say one last thing. “Honestly, Kent, I’m not sure why you’re so adamantly against this. This project is an excellent opportunity for your son. And personally, I think Aleks is going to knock this out of the park.”
