“Come on, sleepyhead. Let’s get you inside,” he whispers, his voice low and soft next to my ear.
I don’t fight letting him take care of me. I just want to feel safe and have someone cuddle me and tell me it’s all going to be okay. I know I shouldn’t. I’ve already been burned by this guy once, but he seems to want to take care of me right now, and I want to let him. Handing him the keys to my apartment, I don’t protest as he walks me across the quiet street, our feet making softshushingsounds in the snow. We’re both quiet as we make our way into the elevator and as he unlocks the door of my loft. Once we’re inside, I turn to face him, blinking slowly. I can’t decipher the look on his face as he sets down his keys and wallet on my hallway table and toes off his boots before turning to me and gently helping me out of my jacket, hanging it on the hook. He makes me sit down on the bench in my entryway and kneels before me, taking my shoes off gently.
“Your feetsies are all wet,” he says softly with a little smile before he pulls off one of my socks, followed quickly by the other. I’m powerless to say a word as he takes care of me so sweetly. I just watch him owlishly. I don’t think anyone’s taken care of me this way since I was a child when I would sometimes fall asleep in the car on our way home from some evening function. I’ve certainly never been cared for like this by anyone I’ve dated.Not that we’re dating.
Without hesitating, he scoops me up in his arms, bridal-style, and I should be embarrassed, but I’m not. All I can do is bury my head in the curve of his neck and wrap my arms around him, holding on as he carries me up to my bed. He’s so warm, and he smells like cedar and man.I don’t want to let him go.
Once we’re upstairs, he puts me down beside my bed and gently slides his hands up under the sides of my Sasquatch polo shirt. I raise my arms so he can take it off, and the way his eyes darken as his pupils dilate is impossible to miss, even in my exhausted state. He bites his bottom lip as he works open the button on my pants and slides them down gently over my thighs. He kneels before me again, and I put my hands on his shoulders to steady myself as I step out of one leg and then the other until I’m standing there in just my boxer briefs. It’s a weird feeling, so intimate but not sexual. I’m not even hard, even with how much he’s been touching me, but there’s a comfortable, warm, liquidy feeling spreading throughout my chest as he cares for me so tenderly. He stands up, and we’re so close. I could just turn my face up to him, loop my arms around his neck, and pull him down into a kiss. But before I can do that, he reaches behind me to pull down the covers on my bed.
“Climb in,” he says softly, his eyes locked on mine. I do what he asks, burrowing down into my soft bed. He pulls the blankets over me and sits on the edge of my bed, reaching out to caress my cheek gently, something in his eyes I can’t interpret. “You need to sleep,” he whispers. Suddenly, I’m gripped with fear that he’s going to take off on me again.
“Don’t go. Please stay. Stay with me,” I whisper. I should be mortified with how I’m begging, but I’ve apparently abandoned any scrap of self-respect because I don’t give a shit. I don’t want to be alone.
There’s a moment of silence before he says softly, “Of course.” A moment later, he slides into bed beside me, and before I can move, he reaches out and pulls me into his broad chest. I’m so very tired, but before I let sleep drag me down into the soft blanket of unconsciousness, I turn and place a soft kiss on his pec, noting how his breath catches in his throat.
“Thank you, Ben,” I whisper, and the last thing I remember is a tender kiss being placed on the top of my head and being wrapped in his strong arms, feeling completely safe and protected.
“Anything… Anything for you,” he whispers, right before I sink into sleep.
BEN
Holy mother of fuck. I can’t believe I’m in Aleks Warren’s bed. Again.He was utterly drained after we left Josie at the hospital. Knowing she’s going to be fine allowed him to start processing all the emotions of the evening he’d been holding back, and it’s a lot. It sounds like the bond between Josie and Aleks is incredibly special. Thinking about Josie’s story breaks my heart, not only for little Josie, suffering at the hands of abusive parents, but for little Aleks, being so young and not knowing how to handle something so heavy. No child should ever have to learn how cruel the world is at such a young age.
The fact that Aleks dropped everything to run to his friend without a second thought is giving me pause. It doesn’t fit with the mental picture I’ve constructed of him. One where he’s a calculating, heartless individual who’s far more concerned with his own best interests than anyone else. But he could not have cared less about his job when the hospital called him. On top of that, what he told me about how his parents helped Josie is messing with the image I have of his father. The Kent Warren who lives in my head is just this side of a monster, but the person who did everything in his power to help a friend of his young son doesn’t jive with that picture.
I don’t know what’s going to happen in the morning when we wake up. I don’t know what any of this means. I’ve been telling myself over and over that Aleks Warren can never be anything more to me than a coworker. But I couldn’t help the urge I felt to take care of him when he needed someone. And clearly, wherever our relationship stands currently, it’s more than simply coworkers. I don’t think that particular job description contains anything about snuggling into bed with him, holding him tightly, and placing soft, gentle kisses to his forehead while he sleeps.
The problem is, I can’t get past the fact that his father’s actions caused a huge amount of harm to my family. How on earth could I even think about bringing Aleks home to them? But maybe I’m crazy to even be worrying about it at all. Maybe I need to stop overthinking this whole thing and let it happen. Take things as they come. It’s not like I’m great at relationships. The chances of us ever getting to the point where I would want to bring him to meet my family are fairly slim, as depressing as that sounds. Fuck, I don’t know. But right now, his warm body curled up against mine feels all kinds of right, so, just for a little while, I’m going to let myself experience this. He needed someone to take care of him, and I was happy to do it. I’m going to do my best not to borrow trouble.
That, of course, is easier than it sounds, and it takes me a long time to fall asleep. Eventually, I’m able to drift off, and the warm, snuggly body pressed into me just feels so good it’s hard to imagine how I’m ever going to sleep without it.
Chapter 16
ALEKS
Blinkingawake,ittakesme a minute to figure out that I’m in my own bed and a second longer to realize I’m not alone. The soft, warm pillow I’m cozied up to is actually a person, and that person is none other than my current coworker, Dr. Benjamin Jacobs.
A hot second later, it all comes back to me: getting the call about Josie’s accident, Ben driving me to the hospital, waiting with me for Jo to be done in surgery, and then driving me home. I don’t remember much after getting home; I must have been so exhausted, combined with the letdown from the adrenaline, I was probably no better than if I was totally wasted.
I can tell the exact second Ben regains consciousness because he stiffens against me, and unfortunately, it’s not in the good way. I tilt my head up so I can see his face, but I deliberately leave my lower half pressed against his side. I’m not going to let him make this weird. No matter what ends up happening between us, I’m incredibly grateful for what he did for me last night, and I want him to know.
“Good morning,” I murmur. God, he’s so cute in the morning. His dark hair is mussed up, and without his glasses, he looks younger than usual. He blinks at me as if he’s getting his bearings before a tentative smile crosses his face.
“Morning,” he says, his voice rough with sleep. “How are you feeling this morning? You were pretty drained last night.”
God, he’s so sweet. Where did he even come from? “I’m actually good,” I say. Taking a chance, I rub my hand across the warm skin of his chest, and I’m pleased to feel the shiver that rolls through his body. “Yesterday was a lot. Thank you so much for being there for me, Ben.”
He bites his bottom lip. “It was nothing,” he says. “Anyone would have done the same. You were really concerned about your friend.”
I shake my head. Even in the short amount of time we’ve spent together, I know he has a habit of brushing off and denying compliments. “Nope. Not everyone would have done the same. You were incredible, Ben. Really. You made it so much easier for me to cope with my stress over Josie. Thank you.” I grab his chin between my thumb and forefinger, moving his head so he has to meet my eyes. A blush rises in his cheeks, but he holds my gaze, a tiny little smile threatening to curl up the edges of his lips.
“Okay. Well, you’re welcome. I… I’m glad you let me help you.” He clears his throat and moves under me, shifting his gaze so he’s no longer meeting my eyes. “I’m… I really am sorry about the way I left you that first night, Aleks. I shouldn’t have left like that. I just… panicked, I guess?”
I really want to ask what the hell happened to make him take off in a panic, but before I can, he changes the subject. “Josie is lucky to have you as a friend, you know. I really admire you for putting her above everything else when she needed you.”
That seems like a weird thing to say. I cock my head to the side, giving him a confused look. “Well, of course. I mean, she was hurt. Wouldn’t anyone do the same for their best friend?”
Ben stares at me for a minute, something I can’t interpret happening behind his brown eyes. “You’d be surprised,” he says after a moment. “Not everyone takes as good care of their friends. A lot of people put themselves first.”
