After our family dinner and Council of Cousins meeting wraps up, I head back to the guesthouse, feeling pretty good about things. I was sitting there with the family, surrounded by the craziness and love that I’m so fortunate to have in my life, and I know for sure that I don’t want to leave. The opportunity in California is a great one, but the chance to grow what has become our family business is what I’ve been waiting for. I’m excited, and I can’t wait to get planning for what the Oregon office of HDH will look like. I call my buddy Shane when I get up to the suite and let him know I’ve decided to stay where I am. He laughs when I tell him my decision.
“Honestly, man, I was fucking shocked when you said you’d consider it. I never thought you’d ever leave the PNW. I’m glad you gave it some thought, but it sounds like a great gig for you.”
“Yeah, it is. I’m really excited. But thanks so much for thinking of me, and I’d love to come down at some point to check out the work you guys are doing down there.”
We end the conversation, and I feel even better; like things might be settling into place for me. I want to talk to Tyler, but I don’t have that sick feeling of desperation I normally get when I'm in a relationship. It’s weird because normally, if I’d gone this long without contact from someone I was dating, I’d be beside myself. But things with Tyler are different. It’s not because I care less, but because deep down inside, I just know it’s going to work out the way it’s supposed to. No matter what happens, we’re going to be okay. Don’t ask me why. I’m not going to question it, but the feeling is strong.
I’ve just crawled into bed when my phone dings. Grabbing it off the bedside table, I smile in the dark when I see Tyler’s name pop up.
Tyler: You awake?
Me: Yup. Just getting into bed. How are you? How are things going?
Tyler: I’m okay. But my mom passed away today.
Oh shit.I sit straight up in bed, wishing I could hear his voice.
Me: Oh my god, I’m so sorry Tyler. Do you need me to come right away?
Tyler: Sam, I’m okay, really. I want to see you, but let’s wait until morning. Things with Aaron are going well, and I want one more night to hang out with just him.
I take a deep breath. Everything in my gut is pushing me to go see him right now, but I can hear the advice of my family. I need to make sure he knows I care and I’m here for him, but I won’t overdo it. He wants to spend this time with his brother. I need to respect that.
Me: Okay, no problem, I get it. But will you call me if you need anything? Any time?
Tyler: I promise. Text me when you know what time you’ll be here tomorrow.
Me: It will be early.
Tyler: lol. I know. I can’t wait to see you.
By the time the sun’s coming up, I’m getting into the truck, heading down to see Tyler. It took all my determination to not get out of bed in the middle of the night and race down to be with him, but I didn’t, and I know I’m doing the right thing. I know I can be what Tyler needs because that’s just who I am. I don’t need to change. I don’t need to contort myself into all these different shapes, trying to be what I think someone’s looking for. Tyler needs me to be myself. I wasn’t trying to be someone else when we met, and I haven’t tried since. We’re right for each other exactly as we are. I’m not sure if Tyler has figured it out yet, but he will. I just know.
An hour later, I pull up to the address Tyler gave me for his brother’s place, a condo in what looks like a decent part of town.
Leaving all my stuff in the car since I’m not entirely sure where I’ll be staying tonight, I buzz the apartment number, and a voice I don’t recognize comes over the intercom.
“Hi, Sam. Come on up.” I guess it must be Aaron. He sounds friendly enough, although I'll reserve judgement until I see how he treats Tyler.
The door of the condo opens as I’m stepping off the elevator a few moments later, and Tyler comes out of the apartment. He’s wearing jeans and a tight black T-shirt that clings to his lean body and makes my mouth water. His tattoos are peeking out from under his sleeve, and he looks amazing. He jogs down the hall toward me and, without hesitation, throws his arms around my neck, capturing my mouth with his.
“Oof,” I mumble into his mouth, but then I respond eagerly. God, he feels so good in my arms. Like he belongs there.
“Hi,” I say with a smile when we finally break apart.
He’s giving off a different vibe. He seems more open, more unguarded or something. I could be projecting, but maybe I’m not the only one who worked through some feelings over the past few days.
“Hi,” he says, and we stare into each other’s eyes for a moment before he kisses me again and unwraps himself from around me. “Come on in and meet Aaron.” He leads me into the condo, where I find a slightly taller, bulkier version of Tyler. They look so much alike, with the same short, dark hair, bright blue eyes, and smattering of freckles across his nose and cheeks, making him look way younger than I know he is. He’s got a jacket on and looks like he’s heading out somewhere.
“Aaron, hi. It’s nice to meet you,” I say, extending my hand.
“Nice to meet you too, Sam,” he answers. For a beat, I feel like we’re two dogs sniffing each other’s butts, trying to determine if we’re friends or enemies.
“I’m so sorry to hear about your mother,” I say to both of them. I’m not sure what Tyler needs from me yet, whether he wants me to be actively helping him get things done or if he wants me to just be here to loan him some strength. Whatever he needs, I can do it.
“Thanks,” both brothers say at the same time.
“Come on in. Are you hungry or anything? Thirsty? We finally ordered groceries, so there’s actually some food here,” Tyler says, leading me into the kitchen.
