“I think we should leave her. I’ve been here all day, and nothing’s changed. I think it’s fine for you to go home and rest, A.” I put a hand on my brother’s shoulder.
“Yeah, you’re right. There’s probably not much point in staying here. Let’s head home.”
CHAPTER 29
SAM
It takes me until I’m halfway back to Seattle to process the fact that Tyler basically sent me packing. Naturally, my first reaction is to freak out, replaying all our interactions, trying to figure out how I fucked it up. My normal internal monologue yells at me that I’m too boring and ordinary for someone like Tyler, but gradually, the voice of reason is beginning to overpower it, telling me to relax. I’ve given Tyler the space he asked for, and I didn’t push him when he didn’t want to talk about what was going on. He’s going through a lot of shit; it makes sense he needs time to process it. Once he can get stuff with his family sorted, he’ll have time for whatever this thing is between us. I know holding to him too tightly will only push him away.Man alive, look at me being all adult and shit.
“Hey, Siri, call Mason,” I say to my phone, and a minute later, my cousin picks up.
“Hey, Sammy, how are things? How’s Tyler?”
“Hey, Mase. Yeah, Tyler’s okay. His brother got back into town today, and Ty’s going to stay with him for a few days, so I thought I’d come home for the rest of the weekend.”
There’s the briefest pause before Mason responds. I haven’t told him anything about what’s happened between Tyler and me over the last few weeks, but I have an inkling he knows more than he’s letting on right now. It’s fine with me if he’s figured it out. I’m not going to keep secrets from him anymore. It’s time to come clean about everything.
“That makes sense. Where are you now? You’ve got your condo rented out, right? You want to stay in the guest house for the weekend?” he asks. I’d been able to sublet my amazing condo for the next few months to a friend of Jax’s from LA. He’s an NHL hockey player who was recently traded to the Seattle team. He was sick of staying in a hotel but didn’t want to get into a long-term lease, so my condo was the perfect solution for both of us.
“Yeah, that’d be good. I was kind of hoping to get together with everyone for drinks or dinner. Do you know if everyone’s free?”
He chuckles. “Yeah, stay with us. And are you officially requesting a meeting of the Council of Cousins? You know we’ll all make time for something so important.” I can hear the smile in his voice. The four of us will always make time for each other.
“No one was expecting me, so if you guys have plans, I don’t want—”
“Dude,” Mason interrupts, “we’re all middle-aged, married, and boring. I’m pretty sure your coming into town will be the highlight of all of our weekends. Do you want to get together with just the four of us, or will it work if the other halves are hanging around? Jax and I can host everyone tomorrow for dinner.”
“Yeah, that sounds great, man, thanks. I’m cool with having everyone there. I’m going to pop into Mom and Dad’s place today, but I’ll sleep at the guest house tonight. If I don’t catch you then, I’ll head over in the morning.”
I hang up with Mason and spend the last part of my drive home wondering how much I should tell everyone tomorrow. I’m desperate for some advice on how to deal with what’s going on between Tyler and me. I want to tell them about my job offer in California. It’s probably a discussion I should have with Mason and Dylan privately first, although it’s not like Grace and all the partners don’t know everything that happens around the office anyway. I’ll have to play it by ear. The last thing I want to do is hurt anyone, least of all Mason.
After spending the afternoon at my parents’ house, I head over to Mason and Jackson’s guesthouse to sleep. It feels weird to be here since the last time I was here was the night of the storm when Tyler and I hooked up… How was that only a few weeks ago?
Every time my phone makes a sound, I jump, hoping like hell it’s Tyler, but so far, I’ve heard nothing. But hanging out with my parents for the afternoon brought home the reality of how different Tyler’s life was growing up. It makes me so sad that he doesn’t have anyone in his life to support him the way my parents and my extended family do for me. If he lets me, I’ll be that person for him, and my family will become his.
On Sunday afternoon, after a lazy morning in bed by myself, I walk up to the main house, and after a couple of quick raps, I let myself in, announcing my presence with a yodel. Two seconds later, Harry and Sally, their pair of Labrador retrievers, come bounding down the hallway toward me, and I get down on my knees to give them both some love. One of these days, I’ll break down and get a dog of my own, but up until now, I’ve resisted.
But after all the thinking I’ve been doing, I’m starting to wonder why that is. Have I really been putting off getting a dog because I’m too busy and not home enough? Or has it just been another thing I’ve been pushing off to the side, part of me that I’m keeping buried in case some random person comes along who I think I’m in love with, and I want to keep myself open and available to mold into whatever I think they want me to be? I shake my head again, and then I’m pulled back out of my daydream as Harry slurps a giant, wet kiss right on my mouth.
“Ugh, gross!” I shout at him, shoving him gently away from me and scrambling to my feet. “I love you, buddy, but not that way! Blech!” I’m wiping my mouth on the back of my sleeve and toeing off my shoes at the same time when I hear a chuckle. Mason’s standing at the far end of the hallway, laughing at me.
“Don’t deny it. You love Harry’s kisses.” He grins at me. “I would normally make a crack about how that’s the most action you’ve seen in a while, but something tells me that might not be the case these days, hmmm?” He cocks an eyebrow at me as we head into the kitchen, where Jackson is standing over the big chef-grade gas cooktop, stirring something that smells like heaven.
“Sammy!” Jax’s face lights up when he sees me, coming over to wrap me in a big hug. He’s not as tall or as built as Mason is, but he’s still bigger than I am, and there’s something about Jackson Cullen that simply makes people comfortable. He’s been that way since the minute we met him. No pretense at all, even though he’s a huge movie star. Mason picked himself a good one.
“Everyone else will be here soon,” Mason says, handing me a beer. “We got lucky—even Reed is off tonight, so it’ll be the full quorum at the Council of Cousins.” He smiles, taking a sip from his own beer. Reed works in the ER so much it can be hard to find a night he’s not working. “I’m glad you’re here a little early though. I want to find out what’s going on with Tyler.”
I blow out a breath as we both get comfortable on the barstools that line the massive kitchen island across from where Jax is working on dinner.
“Well, I haven’t heard from him since I left Tacoma yesterday. He didn’t share much with me, but it doesn’t seem like things are going well. He was upset and didn’t want to talk about it after he talked to the doctor on Friday night.” I hold back from sharing what he did want to do that evening. Some things are best kept private.
“That sucks.” Mason shakes his head, and Jackson’s face is a mask of sympathy.
“It really is,” I say. “Apparently, his mom was a severe alcoholic for most of her life, and her dementia is made worse by the fact that she was such a heavy drinker. It’s fucking sad. Sometimes it’s easy to forget how lucky we are with our family.” I look at Mason, who reaches over and places a hand gently over Jackson’s where it’s resting on the island. The two of them share a small smile.
“So, is Tyler okay? I’m kind of surprised you didn’t stay down there with him,” Mason says, one eyebrow cocked, and I know he knows something’s up.
“Yeah,” I say. “I’m surprised too.” I blow out a sigh, trying to figure out where to start while Mason and Jax wait patiently.
