Kate was in the truck and sitting as far away from Jack as she could get—and they weren’t speaking. The truth was that she was in a state of shock from what he’d said last night. A skull toddling across the floor had been a momentary distraction, but there were some things in life that couldneverbe overridden.
Last night, Jack had talked of...well, a child. After he said it, he went to his room and they hadn’t spoken of it since. This morning he’d been his usual self. Well, maybe a little quieter, but nothing odd. Certainly nothing to hint at what he’d said.
The lockdown had changed things for all of them. Early in 2020, Gil, Jack’s friend and foreman, said he wanted time with his twelve-year-old son, Quinn, so he’d bought some land in the Rocky Mountains. He said he was taking months off so he and Quinn could build a cabin and do some hunting and fishing. Jack wanted to help them get started, so the three of them cleaned out storage units of building materials, loaded two pickups and two trailers, and headed to the mountains.
Right after they arrived, the lockdown began. Jack called Kate and Sara to say that he wanted to stay until the country opened back up. The women were glad for him to have a few weeks of male-only time. When the separation continued, they kept in touch as best they could, considering there was no cell service at the cabin. Sara sent long letters, trying to get laughter out of what was going on at home with Kate and her new circumstances of dueling mothers. Sara dubbed it “The Parent War,” with Kate being the center of a lot of seriously unpleasant emotion.
Jack wasn’t fooled by Sara’s attempt to sugarcoat it all. He knew what Kate was being put through. But he didn’t dwell on it as that would have made Kate feel worse. Instead, Jack replied with photos of Gil and Quinn and him fishing, hiking, laughing.
The women could see that he was happy. “You did this,” Sara said to Kate. “You changed his life. It’s good to see him smile.”
They were nice words, but Kate frowned. She missed Jack tremendously.
It was months before he returned—and when he did, he was different. For one thing, he’d changed physically. “A Colorado winter takes off the fat,” he said to Sara.
To Kate, he didn’t say anything. He just looked at her.
She’d seen photos of him and had laughed with Aunt Sara that Jack and Gil weren’t shaving. But Kate was unprepared for the impact this new Jack had on her. His beard was down to his collarbone and there were strands of gray in his hair. It wasn’t a perfectly shaped, city-man beard, but scraggly.Like a Viking, she thought. The gray seemed to say that he was now older, wiser, more experienced. More importantly, it seemed to say that now he knew what he wanted in life.
Between the beard and his new leanness, she had that ancient female reaction of her legs turning to butter. If they’d been alone, she wasn’t sure she could have stayed upright.
But they hadn’t been alone—and it took effort to recover herself while the others talked. Usually, she and Jack tossed words back and forth like little daggers, but this time she could think of nothing. Finally, trying to sound sophisticated, she said, “Good heavens, Jack, you could braid that beard.”
He didn’t reply, just turned away. But minutes later, when he bent close in front of her to pick up his bag, he said, “You can braid it for me.”
Kate drew in her breath so hard she fell against the couch. Jack headed down the hall to his room. He didn’t look back.
She thought she’d seen every aspect of him. She’d seen his temper, she’d held him when he’d cried in grief, and she’d experienced the fierce, selfless way he protected the people he loved. But she hadn’t seen this man who spoke of her braiding his beard. And oh how she wanted to do it!
It had taken the loud closing of Jack’s bedroom door to bring her out of her trance. She shook her head to clear it.
To her embarrassment, her aunt Sara was watching her—and smiling in such a knowing way that Kate’s whole body turned red.
“I think I’ll see if B&H has any ring lights,” Sara said in a voice of fake innocence. “Jack could do that TikTok challenge. You know, where he’s shirtless and holds the circle light above his head? He’d be half naked, with his muscles showing their deep, dark shadows. I bet he’d get a million followers on the first day.” Sara narrowed her eyes as if in warning. “Lots of women will want him.”
Kate tried to speak, to make a who-cares? retort, but it wouldn’t come out.
Aunt Sara turned away, went to her room, and shut the door.
All that happened on the day Jack returned. The next day he was clean-shaven and he avoided looking directly at her.
Then there was last night. Sara went to bed early so she and Jack were alone in the family room. In the past, he would have pulled her feet onto his lap, like she was his sister. But he didn’t.
“Are you okay?” she asked. “Is something bothering you?”
He took his time answering. “Sometimes you see something that you want. I mean, really want. With all your soul.”
“Like a piece of jewelry?” she asked, teasing, trying to get it back to normal between them.
He didn’t smile. “Like a life. Gil and his son. What they have, what they share. I realized that bond was everything.” He took a breath. “I’m tired of living in one room. I want my own house. I want my own...child.”
The hair on Kate’s neck stood up, but she said, “Are you planning to adopt?”
“I thought maybe I’d try to make one.”
Her heart seemed to put itself on hold. “Like building a house? With a hammer and nails?”
Once again, he gave her “that look.”
