“Sadie Hawkins isn’t for weeks. But the Halloween gala is tonight. I have an inkling that if you ask again, she’ll say yes.”
Ash scoffed. “And how would you know that?”
Mr. Brightside let out a long-suffering sigh. “A little bird told me,” he said, with no inflection whatsoever in his tone, and Ash couldn’t tell if he was serious—like a raven had come to his window in the middle of the night and divulged this secret—or if he was just annoyed with yet another student not listening to an adult.
With that, Mr. Brightside left without even saying goodbye, his black cape streaming behind him with dramatic finality.
As soon as Ash closed the front door, he flopped onto the living room sofa and whipped out his phone.
Ash:The weirdest thing just happened.
True:You stopped eating like a blue whale?
Ash:Huh?
True:They consume 40 million krill a day. Or maybe you identify more with the hummingbird. Having to eat every 10 minutes.
Ash:What? No. I’m nothing like a hummingbird.
Onny:Hobbit! He eats like a hobbit. Ash, did you have second breakfast today?
True:And elevenses?
Onny:And luncheon.
True:And afternoon tea.
Ash:I hate you guys. Forget it. Not going to tell you anything ever again.
Onny:OK sorry sorry!! What was the weird thing that happened?
Ash:…
Onny:True, you have to apologize to him too.
Onny:TRUE!
True:You’re not a hobbit. Or a whale or a hummingbird.
Ash:I didn’t see the word Sorry.
True:Fine. S O R R Y. You satisfied?
Ash:I will screenshot this for the archives. True actually apologized.
Onny:TELL US WHAT HAPPENED ALREADY!!!
Ash:Mr. Brightside gave me relationship advice.
True:What.
Onny:Was not expecting that.
True:Also, why are you hanging out with our teacher on the weekend? Nerd.
Ash:Shut up. He and Mayor Grimjoy came by to pick up their masks.
Onny:So what did he tell you? OMG is it true that vampires can hypnotize their victims into falling in love with them???
