“What were you going to say, Jake? A few minutes ago?”
“I… Well, when the Tuesday Ladies and everyone had me trapped at Pop’s, it came up that you’re not going to be in the show. Onstage. They were all pretty confused and, actually, a little worried about you. Sounded like Trib—I guess you know him too?—was really sounding off about it. Are you doing okay with all of this?”
Vivien’s throat closed up a little and her eyes stung at this unexpected topic. She gave a quick shake of her head and told herself to stop being an idiot. If there was anyone she could talk to about this, it was Jake.
“I just can’t,” she said after a minute.
He nodded. “I only wondered if things had gotten better since…since I knew you.”
“No. I simply don’t have anydesireto be onstage ever again. My stage career—short-lived as it was—was tied so tightly to Liv that I get anxious whenever I think about stepping out there in front of people, knowing that she’ll never be able to do it again, that I have to do it alone. I mean, we shared a womb, we shared a crib, beds…acting roles…” She shook her head and collected herself. “We even played each other sometimes, just to mess with people.
“I know it sounds weak, but I get cold and clammy, I break out in a heavy sweat…it’s bad. I tried once after—after you left New York to audition for a small role in an off-off-off Broadway show, and I had an anxiety attack and couldn’t even walk onto the stage for the audition. I puked in the bathroom instead. So.” She spread her hands and shook her head sadly. “My acting days are over.”
He tilted his head, looking at her intently, still gilded gently by the moonlight. “Things might change—there’s no reason to force them to, but someday they might. After all, Liv is still with you all the time. Isn’t she? She’d be with you if you ever went onstage again, wouldn’t she? It’s not like you’re leaving her behind or moving on. She’swithyou. You’re connected. You always will be.”
Vivien’s eyes really stung now, and there was no way she could get any words out of her mouth; her throat was closed up tight. She’d never really thought about it that way, had she?Liv is always with me. We’d still be sharing a role, kinda.Looking at him through a watery gaze, she nodded…and just then, she felt a very definite nudge against her left arm.
Jake was sitting four feet away from her.
But even more moving than his sensitive, honest words was the realization that he understood her relationship with Liv, that he didn’t think she was crazy or delusional. Always before, she’d wondered a little.
And maybe it had taken Jake meeting a ghost himself to fully grasp how a loved one never quite leaves behind those who remember them. Especially ones who’d shared a womb, who could read each other’s thoughts…who were soul mates in a way.
“Thanks,” she managed to say, still blinking rapidly. “That actually makes a lot of sense…and Liv seems to agree.” She gave an awkward laugh and sipped her wine. “So, speaking of ghosts…”
He scratched the stubble that had just started to show on his jaw. “I can’t imagine how crazy it must have been with the three ladies there at the theater and all hell breaking loose with the ghost.”
“I was terrified one of them was going to get hurt—or worse. But Jake, I’ve been thinking…”
“When have you had time to think? I thought I’d kept you pretty busy.” He gave her a leer that lingered on her breasts, which happened to be bra-less.
“Maybe you’d better work at it a little harder,” she said with a sly smile that grew slyer when she saw him shift a little in his seat.Shorts getting a little tight there, big guy? Emphasis on thebig.
“You’re such a slave driver,” he said. Then he looked around and winced a little. “Great. Now I’m always going to be thinking about Liv lurking about, judging my…uh…technique.”
Vivien laughed heartily at that. “I promise not to tell you what she says.” When he looked nauseated, she laughed again. “Joking!”
She forked up her last bite of steak. “Anyway, I was thinking about the ghost thing. The ladies said they heard the Nutcracker music—which I honestly don’t remember if I heard anything or not, I was so freaked out—and Iva said the ghost wanted her to go down to the orchestra pit. Which is where we found that trunk with the Nutcracker stuff in it.
“And,” she said, stabbing a piece of potato, “it wasn’t until after we opened the trunk and found the Nutcracker stuff that things started to get really crazy. Up until then, it was just a chilly breeze and that weird shadow. I just wonder if somehow, when we opened the trunk, we fully released the ghost’s strength.”
“Like Pandora’s box. And what weird shadow?”
“Oh, I guess I didn’t tell you about that. It wasn’t anything— Well, yes, I guess it was,” she said, gathering her thoughts. “Twice this weird shadow came out of nowhere and sort of glided over the floor at the theater. And then it was gone—although both times it was accompanied by a cool brush of air. The second time I saw it was down in the pit, right before you got there.”
“And it was definitely not caused by anything around you?”
“No. It was the same shadow, and there was nothing else both times—I was alone in the theater. And here’s the thing—one of the things—I just realized when I wasthinking,” she said with another sly smile, “I got up in the middle of the night at home that same night we found the Nutcracker stuff, and when I came out to the kitchen, I saw that same shadow—not gonna lie, I freaked out for a minute—but then I realizedthattime, it was the Nutcracker headpiece that was giving off the shadow. It was the shape of its hat—a tall military hat with a slanted top.”
“So what you’re saying is, the ghost has something to do with the Nutcracker.”
“Which happened to have been thelastshow that was ever done at the theater. And they shut it down suddenly and for no reason, and no one ever really found out why.And—oh, I just realized this—when the ghost threw everything around in the workshop, the cast photo-poster fromThe Nutcrackerwas right there in the middle of the floor. I didn’t think anything of it until now.”
“But the ghost—according to Iva and Bruce Banner—was female. The Nutcracker is definitely male.”
“Oh, yes, I know. But somehow it’s connected. I just don’t know how.”
He nodded. “All right. That’s really interesting, and it makes sense—as much as a ghost makes sense.” He laughed a little uncomfortably, and Vivien found it adorable that he was still awkward talking about ghosts…especially since he’d acknowledged Liv.
