“I’m mostly curious about the father—for obvious reasons,” Declan said. “I mean, is he in the picture at all? Because—well, I’m getting pretty attached to you, Leslie, and I’m not the type of guy who plays around. Or who is played aroundon. You know?” He reached for her hand and covered it with his. “It’s been a long time since I’ve been with someone long term, and I’m pretty sure I’m moving in that direction with you.” More quickly than he thought he shouldadmit.
She squeezed his hand and then released him. “The father was a man named Eric. He was a business associate who lived in Denver. We were never involved on a long-term basis. Just…got together a few times. When I was in town, or he was inPhilly.”
He picked up a piece of apple and examined it. “So, Eric. Is that what the E is for on the calendar hanging in yourkitchen?”
“The E— Oh, no. No, no. The E is for Ella, the name I had picked out for thebaby.”
“And so this Eric—does he have a last name?—is no longer in the picture? Even though you…um…” He lifted his brows andwaited.
“Even though he was the father of the baby, no, he’s not in the picture at all. He never was. Eric and I both—well, we were each too busy to date and had no interest in relationships anyway. InterWorks had an office in Denver, so when I was in town, we…” She spread her hands. “It was all a very casual, less-than-friends-but-with-benefits arrangement with no attachments…and then I ended uppregnant.”
“And how did he take it? The news?” A few months ago, Declan would have been terrified at the thought of being the recipient of such news, but he’d obviously come to look at things a lot more differently since Stephanie had come into hislife.
“Well…I’ll admit, I was lost and shocked and confused when I found out I was expecting a baby. It was in the middle of the prep leading up to the public offering, and my life was—well, it was insane. I could hardly keep my head above water; I was working seventy hours a week, and I was pregnant. Fortunately,” she said, looking at him with almond-shaped eyes limned with worry and grief, “at least I knew I would have the resources to raise the baby as a single parent. Maybe not as much time as I might have wanted, but the resources to make sure she was raised with everything sheneeded.”
“And so what happened when you told Eric?” Declan took the opportunity to snag a few cashews to build up his energyagain.
Shagging a woman three times in one day—in, oh, less than six hours—took a lot out of aguy.
“So when I told Eric,” Leslie said, reaching for a piece of apple, “he immediately insisted we get married. Even though we weren’t at all committed to each other, or in a relationship, and living a thousand miles from each other, he insisted the right thing to do was to getmarried.”
“Oh boy.” Declan paused as those words sank in and he realized…That could have beenme.
So true. He would have insisted he and Cara get married—because what else did you do at eighteen with an unexpected pregnancy? Or, apparently, even at thirty-something.
He felt a little queasy thinking aboutit.
“Exactly,” Leslie replied with a wry smile, as if she could read hismind.
“And you told him…?” Declan’s appetite was failing all of a sudden. It was likedéjà vufor him…but notexactly.
“I told himno.”
Declan realized he was holding himself tensely, and that his belly was tight and starting to churn, so he forced himself to relax. Whatever had happened with Eric and Leslie was over. So why was he feeling all knotted up over this? Yet, he felt as if a big shoe was about to drop…but he didn’t knowwhy.
“I didn’t want to marry a man I only casually liked, and definitely didn’t love. Plus, I had a career in Philly, and he had a career in Denver, and ne’er the twain shall meet, or so they say. And I knew I’d be miserable, and we’d resent each other. But he wouldn’t let it go. He kept pushing. So I made a…let’s call it an executivedecision.”
“An executivedecision?”
“I told Eric the baby wasn’t his afterall.”
“So…you lied to him?” Something red had begun to creep into the edge of his vision, but he managed to keep his voice calm andsteady.
Leslie seemed to sense his unrest. “Not technically. I didn’t know for certain. I never did genetic testing before—uh—before I miscarried. But the only other possible father was a—a one-night fling I had with an old college flame when he came totown.”
To Declan’s surprise, she wasn’t avoiding his eyes. Nor, though she was subdued, did she seem ashamed or repentant for her decisions. Calm, deliberate, intense…but notapologetic.
“So you let Eric off the hook, as you say, and planned to raise a child on your own that washis.”
“I didn’t really have a choice,” she said. “I didn’t want to marryhim—”
“So don’t marry the guy. What’s he going to do, drag you to the church? If you said no, what was he going to do?” Declan was aware how tight and hard his voice had become, but he couldn’t helpit.
This wassonot what he’d wanted to hear. Not what he’d expected from Leslie. This sort of deceit. This high-handed chief executive officerploy.
“Right. I know.” Her laugh was now—but too late—ashamed and abashed. “It wasn’t the bestdecision—”
“It definitelywasn’t.”
