I swallow hard and find it difficult to meet her gaze. “You mean about …”
“About Lex.” She leans back against the pillows and offers me her cup.
I take it and place it on the little medical table by her bedside. When I get a whiff of its contents, I feel as though my nose hairs have been singed.
“Strong. Good.” She folds her hands over her stomach and keeps her steady gaze on me. “It would probably kill you, though.” She taps the side of her nose. “Or perhaps not. The moon glows so strongly within you.”
“You knew?”
“Not at first. I could see the witch’s marks on you, runes on your soul. I told you as much. But I did not realize when they said ‘sister’ they meant …” She gives a little shrug. “Sister.”
“My mother never told me about her deal with the moon witches. I had no idea.”
“No need to tell you. That washerdeal with the crescent moon. One she paid for, and one she carried for you.”
Mother lost her true love for me. It’s so unthinkable. I want to hug her, to tell her how much it means to me. But she’d probably poke me with a needle and tell me to toughen up.
“I still have my mother. But yours—” I take a shaking breath. “I was so confused and full of Eraldon’s lies that I didn’t believe Lex when she spoke the truth to me. I … hurt her. Iwantedto hurt her.” I look down at my clawed hands as if they’re alien to me. “I struck her. And then when Eraldon forced her to break the barrier to the Nightkeep, I watched and did nothing.” I don’t want to cry again, not when Grimelda is the one I’ve hurt, but my eyes sting all the same as I remember what Lex went through. “I’m so sorry, Grimelda. So, so sorry.” My tears fall as I try to blink them away.
She sighs. “I know all. Lex and I danced with the magic before she left for the Glowing Lands.”
“You saw her?” I wipe my eyes.
“She told me of you, of how you were changed and enthralled.” She takes my hand, her skin dry and wrinkled from whatever evil Eraldon worked on her. “She asked me to avenge her. I promised her I would.”
I can feel Solano’s attention prick up, but I wave him away. Whatever revenge Grimelda seeks on me is right and fair. I know what I did to Lex, and so, it seems, does she.
“I won’t let her harm you.”
“This is between Grimelda and me.Pipe down over there.”
He doesn’t respond with anything except irritation and fierce protectiveness.
“As I’m in no shape to make good on my promise to Mother, and you are eaten up with guilt, it seems now is the time for me to make you a bargain.” She reaches for her tea, and I hand it back to her.
How many times had my mother warned me to never make deals, never bargain? Almost as many times as she mentioned “the bloom of my youth” but not quite. Even so, I’ve made plenty of deals ever since I left the night realm as Solano’s consort. Some for good, some for ill.
“What bargain?” I eye her warily.
Lunarie, Caltinius, and Sophina have stopped talking altogether.
“Swear by the magic that you will slay Eraldon.”
Solano bursts into the infirmary. “She can’t make such a promise.”
“She can speak for herself.” The witch gives him a piercing glare before returning her gaze to me. “Can’t you,darkindle?”
“Yes.”
“If you promise to slay Eraldon, I will have fulfilled my vow to Lex, and our forgiveness will be yours.”
Solano places his hand on my shoulder. “Emma, you don’t have to make that promise. I should be the one to slay him. Not you. You’ve been through enough.”
I think back through all the darkness Eraldon brought me, the pain and the violations of my mind, body, and spirit. The more I ponder it, the angrier I grow.
Grimelda starts to smile. “Lex would approve of your desire for vengeance. Self-pity is for the weak.”
I arch a brow. “You and my mother really are in on this together, aren’t you?”
