The little girl smiled up at her mother and then slid to the floor, where she began playing with the toys her mother had brought for her. Lydia pointed to them. “He bought those for her. They’ve become her new favorites.”
Rory looked at the castle-and-princess playset with ponies and stables. The detective had covered all the bases. Smart man. Hewas another Gideon. The moment the thought entered her mind, she tried to push it away. Gideon had been her fantasy man, and he hadn’t lived up to the fantasy. Maybe no man could. Maybe no woman could.
She considered the things Gideon had told her about his family. No doubt he’d had fantasies about the perfect parents. His mother and father certainly hadn’t lived up to his expectations. Did anyone? It was possible everyone put far too many expectations on relationships. Since she didn’t know the first thing about them, she didn’t know one way or the other.
“Do people even have good marriages anymore?” Lydia asked. “It seems to me no one lasts more than a few years, and then it’s on to the next person.”
“My parents may be elitist snobs,” Cindy said. “And they do drive me crazy, but they love each other. They’ve been together for forty-seven years, and they still gaze at each other across the room like teenagers. When I was a kid, I remember being embarrassed that they were always holding hands, and Dad would grab Mom and dance with her across a room. Now I think it’s incredibly sweet. I felt like I found that with Matthew, the boys’ father. I adored him almost from the moment I set eyes on him. There was never anyone else for me.”
She looked down at her hands, and Rory’s heart lurched. She looked so alone, so destroyed. For the first time, Rory felt a kinship with her. Of all the women she’d become close with, she knew Cindy the least. Cindy came from money. She was always composed. It was difficult to tell at times whether she was hurting or not. She didn’t let anything show on her face.
Instinctively, Rory knew she would never want another man after losing Gideon. He was the only man who would ever work for her. They fit. It was that simple. He would have been the loveof her life. She just knew that when he was close to her, something deep inside opened up where she’d been so closed off. It sounded corny even to her, but her heart sang around him. Rory was all about music. Lyrics. Poetry. Gideon amplified those traits in her.
Was that how Cindy felt about her husband? They’d had two children together. She was struggling to bring them up in the way she believed he would want them raised.
“That’s nice to hear,” Lydia said. “I really like him. I want Warren to be real.”
Rory closed her eyes and pressed her to-go mug to her forehead. How many times had she said that very thing to herself? She’d wanted Gideon to be real.
I am real, Red. I’m sorry I let you down.
To her dismay, she’d connected with him. She tended to do that when she was upset. More and more, that was happening, as if she couldn’t stop herself. The spot just above her left temple gave off that strange sensation, as if her skin were so tight it wanted to peel away. She didn’t fight the impression but rather sank into it, allowing the pain to wash over her.
I know you didn’t mean to, Gideon. I understand you better now.
Just because she understood him didn’t mean it didn’t still hurt like hell. She needed to feel like she belonged somewhere. With someone. She wanted to be number one in his life the way he was in hers. That probably wasn’t fair since she had no past and no family. If she had, she might put them in front of him just as he had done.
“If you want my honest opinion of Detective Larrsen, Lydia,” Cindy said, “I believe he’s as real as they get. My advice is to go slow. You have a child, so it makes sense to be cautious, but if you’re attracted to him and he is to you, take the chance.”
Janice sighed. “I’m not the best with men, you know that, butI’m going to second Cindy on this one, Lydia. I like the man. He’s a good cop. And he’s totally into you.”
Pam nodded her approval.
Sally beamed at her. “You know what I think of him. I spent a little time talking to him after the break-in at my apartment when he walked me back from the bar, and he was so nice. He didn’t have to be. I don’t think any of the other detectives would have taken the time with me when I was so distraught. I don’t know why I thought I was going to be skipped over, but I did.”
Rory could feel Lydia’s gaze on her. She forced a smile. “I already told you, hon. Detective Larrsen is clearly a good man. You have good judgment. You don’t need any of us to tell you what you should do.” She put down the to-go mug. “We’ve both got to work tonight, and I still need to try to catch up on sleep.”
The crowd seemed rowdier than usual, which was saying a lot. Rory leaned across the bar to better hear the orders being shouted to her from customers two rows deep.
“Utter chaos,” Brad yelled, grinning from ear to ear. “This is what success sounds like.”
“I suppose so,” Rory called back as she lined up eight shot glasses and poured tequila for Dana’s customers. She added two whiskey sours to her tray and handed four more to customers seated on barstools. As soon as they vacated their seats, four more people replaced them. Rory noted one of them was the man who had stood beside Scott Tinsdale in her parking garage.
She ignored him, made seven Bloody Marys and handed them to the row behind those on the barstools. Two groups of what appeared to be college boys were hollering for beer. That was an easy order to accomplish, and she did so quickly, getting the ten of themout of the way. A round of martinis for two tables was next, and then she made gin and tonics. Her barback was right there, ringing up drinks and keeping tabs for her.
She’d never seen her boss so happy. Lani was working a bartending station and so was Lydia. Brad filled in on breaks. Brad worked as a barback if necessary. He rang up tabs. Work was going smooth even with how chaotic it was.
Rory slapped napkins down in front of the customers on barstools, including the man who had been talking to Tinsdale. “What can I get for you?” He and three of the others were repeat customers. The other three were new. She didn’t know the man’s name, but he’d been in before and he’d ordered whiskey. No ice. No frills. The other three repeat customers had ordered whiskey sours.
“Ballard,” he volunteered. “Theo Ballard. Whiskey. No ice.”
The other three ordered their usual, and the new three wanted rum and Cokes. Rory made small talk while she made the drinks. To her surprise, Ballard vacated his seat to allow others to take it and order. He joined another man at a small table near the back exit.
Rory kept her eye on them as the night wore on, but neither man gave off the kind of energy that set off her radar. They weren’t in her section, and Trudi was their waitress, not Dana. Had they been in her section, she might have thought Theo Ballard had been sent by Harvey to deliver another message, but he didn’t seem to be paying attention to her. Other than watching him as she did everyone, Rory dismissed him to the background of the bar and concentrated on keeping up with her work.
Toward the end of the night, Brad bumped her with his hip. “Mandatory break, Rory. You need to use your inhaler. Seriously. You haven’t slowed down for a minute. I’ve got this.”
She’d been in the zone and hadn’t noticed time passing. Brad was right. She was beginning to find it hard to breathe. “Thanks.”Switching places smoothly, she hurried to the employee bathroom, not realizing how long it had been since she’d been able to go.
