“Will those guards find us?” I asked.
“I don’t know. They’ll have alerted the whole goddamn army by now.”
“I wonder why Miller didn’t use the gun sooner.”
Luke grimaced. “He didn’t really have a chance. If I’d known he had it, I would’ve killed him first.”
“Why would you save him for last anyway?”
Glaring at the road ahead of him, Lucas’s jaw clenched. “Pride. Stupidity.”
Ah, that would probably haunt him until his dying day.
“I thought about you every day,” I whispered.
He expelled one bitter laugh. “I thought about you every second.”
“You found me.”
Surely he’d break a bone if he continued gripping the steering wheel so tightly. “I didn’t find you. You were thrown in my face.”
My voice dropped to a whisper. “I’m sorry, Lucas. I shouldn’t have begged. I only made things harder.”
He stayed quiet. I stared at his face without blinking, scared that if I glanced away, he’d disappear.
He slammed his hand onto the steering wheel. “Don’t apologize for that. Ever. Ask me for anything, Sophia. Never be afraid to ask me for anything.”
“Even death?”
“Even death. I won’t give you that, but you can ask me for anything you want.” Thick strands of guilt strangled his words.
I wanted to cry again. “Lucas, this isn’t your fault.”
“All I’ve wanted is for you to be safe, and I can’t fucking manage it.” He reached out with his injured arm and grabbed my hand. “I was very clear if anything happened to you, I wouldn’t take it well.”
“It wasn’t a mission. I was taking care of injuries from an attack, and they sieged our healing house.”
He cursed under his breath.
“But I’m safe now,” I said. “With you.”
“You’re not safe with me.” His voice cracked.
Brows drawn together, I shook my head. “I’m always safe with you.”
He glanced at me, taking a deep breath as his eyes darted over my tear-stained face.
“I love you so much, Lucas.”
“I love you, too. But that’s only going to make the next part very painful.”
“The next part?”
The Jeep came to a stop at the house on Evanston.
“You’re not safe with me.”
31
