When Lucas entered the bedroom, already dressed in Hunter black in preparation for the day, he caught me examining my leg, and his mouth tightened.
“I have to go,” I said.
His head dipped, and he busied himself with straightening his cuffs. “I disagree.”
“I can’t stay here forever, Lucas.”
“Why not?” he asked, lifting his head to glare at me. “What have they ever done for you? Tell me what they can give you that I can’t. You are so much safer?—”
“I’mhiding,” I said.
“You’re healing.”
I pointed at my thigh. “I’m healed. I’m better. Because of you.”
“And if I return you to them, they’ll throw you right back into the firing line.”
“I agreed to this,” I said, taking his hand. “This is what I signed up for when I agreed to be part of the Defiance.”
He shook me off and sat at the edge of the bed, dropping his head into his hands. Raven waves fell forward, hiding his expression. Morning sunlight glinted over the silvery scars on his knuckles, the sharp angles of his body. He was a study in melancholy, armored with trauma and sorrow.
And I loved him.
So much.
It almost hurt, this love, knowing how it would end. Part of me wondered why I’d even consider leaving him when we had so few seconds left together.
But what if there were a path for us?
What if I found a way for him to live?
It was only possible if the Defiance won.
He let out a sharp sigh, then pinned me with a stare. “You sure?”
I nodded and slipped closer to run my fingers through his hair. “I’ll always come back to you.”
He grunted.
“And you’ll stay with me, right?”
He tugged me down for a kiss. “Until I die.”
Until I die. The only promise he’d make. He wouldn’t admit to any feelings or imply we had a future. I could have him until the day he died, and he believed that day approached with unfailing speed.
The thought was like acid in my veins.
“I want you more than once a week, Sophia,” he said against my lips.
I gave in to the urge to climb on top of him. “I’ll come to you,” I said between kisses. “Every night.”
He spun me onto the mattress, and both of us relinquished our words.
The walkback to headquarters was both terrifying and painful. I hadn’t anticipated the vulnerability of the outdoors after being safely harbored with Lucas for weeks.
Golden sun. Singing birds. Death hiding in every shadow.
My leg throbbed relentlessly by the time I arrived, but I drew little attention despite my limp. Adam, however, stopped me at the top of the stairs with a slack stare.
