A lump formed in my throat. Even after my father had betrayed me, even after he’d disappointed me beyond compare, my mind still tangled with the memories of what was. Of what we’d had before he’d sold me out to Thorin.
And what was worse? I was left with all these questions. Ones that would never get answered, because they required the man himself.
Of why he’d betrayed me. Of why he’d tried to scam the Spires. Of whatever had fueled him to keep so many secrets from me.
My heart ached, and the first sob erupted from my throat. My whole body shook with them as Cillian held me steady in the shower, the water washing my tears down the drain. There was no escaping that this event would color my entire existence from here on out, and yet…I still had something to hold onto.
The very person who clutched me tight like he was afraid I’d vanish.
My tears began to subside, and I turned around, encircled by Cillian’s arms. My mouth met his.
This wasn’t just a kiss—no, it was a reclamation. It was our souls meeting together again in a reunion that almost brought me to my knees. Cillian slipped his tongue into my mouth, claiming me hungrily with a desperation that reminded me of all we’d nearly lost.
I melted to his touch, to his hands on my hips, to his lips on mine. A deep, guttural groan escaped him, vibrating against my mouth, and I basked in the taste of him, the feel of his hard, muscular body against mine. In the safety I felt in this demon’s presence, which was unparalleled.
His kiss offered a balm to my soul when I needed it the most, and the water washed away the rest of my grief, my terror, if only in the moment. Right now, all that existed was the two of us.
His firm grip on my hips kept me upright as I kissed him with everything I had in me, trying to convey the depths of how he’d changed me. How his love had transformed my entire life.
Cillian let out a low growl and nipped at my lower lip. He pulled back to tip his forehead against mine. “Beau, I almost lost you.”
“I think that’s my line,” I responded. Water sluiced down our bodies, but I reveled in the heat and comfort it brought. “I can’t imagine a future without you.”
“You won’t have to,” he said. “But you’re no longer a prisoner here. You’re free to come and go as you please.”
I swallowed hard. “Like Charles, Theo, and Amelia? I can still live here?”
He clutched my hips a little tighter. “You’ll be lucky to escape this room most times, because I’m going to defile you daily. I want you with me, pet. In my bed, in my home, in my life.”
“Can I still work as your personal assistant?” I asked, unsure what lay ahead with our situation shifting.
“Yes, thank fuck,” he said, his fangs poking out with his grin. “I would never be able to find anyone as meticulous as you.” He poured some bodywash into his hand and began to rub me down with it. I surrendered to his callused, competent palms, his care not to nick me with his claws.
“I will miss being a librarian, though,” I said as I washed the suds off. “There’s something addictive in being able to curate all that knowledge.” I squeezed some bodywash into my own palm. “Your turn.”
Cillian let me coat him in suds, and I took my time enjoying the glide over his massive pecs, his thick thighs. God, he was magnificent. And he was all mine.
He let out a low hum that vibrated through the air. “What if you still had those responsibilities?”
“I’m listening.”
“The books I have…the collection continues to grow, and I need to expand it. I’m thinking one of the rooms down in the casino. While most are here to gamble, having a library here where anyone can come and spend some time reading would add to the draw of the Spires.” The sheer tenderness in those golden eyes would unmake me.
My heart squeezed tight. “I love you, Cillian.”
He brushed his thumb against my jawline. “And I love you, pet. You’re the best thing that’s ever walked into my casino, and I never want to let you go again. I don’t think I’d survive.”
“If I have any say in it, you won’t have to.” Gravity descended on me, a reminder we’d almost lost all this today.
“Let’s get out of the shower,” Cillian said as he reached over and turned the spray off. “Want to take a walk?”
My brows drew together as I stepped out of the tub, grabbing a towel to rub down. “Where are you thinking?”
“Just the garden,” he said. “We’ll catch it before nightfall.”
“Sure.” I headed over to his drawers and snagged a T-shirt and sweats I’d stowed in one of them. I’d started to accumulate clothes in there throughout the weeks spent in his bed. Even though I’d cleaned up and changed into new clothes, the bloodstains lingered in my mind, a slight tug at my psyche I couldn’t escape.
Cillian threw on a Henley and slacks, then slipped on his shoes. He extended a hand. “Come on.”
