"It'ssacredto them," Alastor looks as frustrated by having to be in the same room as I feel. "So yes, only one copy. Not to be changed, added to or taken from except by the current president of Sanctus Sculitis."
"And why did you steal it?"
He groans loudly, "Oh my god, I'm not going through this again. The important thing is that I did. Andyoushould have itsomewhere safe and sound. And if you don't, we have got a big fucking problem."
"The problem here is you," I tell him. "Why didn't you just destroy it? Blow it up, light it on fire, fuck, do something besides pass your problems onto someone else?"
Now he looks at me likeI'man idiot, "You don't think I tried all that? It can't be destroyed. Call it magic, science, their profane rituals, I'm not sure. All I know is that neither fire, acid, nor a fucking axe could do any damage to it. All I got for my efforts were singed eyebrows and a fucking chemical burn on my leg."
If this book is really what he says it is, and it's really the only one, there mightactuallybe a chance that all this will be effectively over. All I have to do is get home, find the fucking book, and take it out into the deepest part of the Bering Strait, where no one will everfindit.
And in a decade or so, their power will diminish to almost nothing, whether or not they even get their hands on Isla.
Hope, raw and radiant, finally grows in my chest. All this time, it's felt like I was fighting an uphill battle. Like Prometheus, doomed to repeat the same actions, the same pain,over and over again. But I finally have some kind of end in sight, some semblance of a future where justice is served for those the Sanctum has harmed.
We just have to wait it out a few more years.
"So you two need to runalongback to wherever you've been. I don't wanna know where you are, forall ofour sakes."Alastor announces before standing, rubbing his hands down his pantsbefore grabbinganother drink and holding it up in a mocking toast, "Hopefully, you have the book.If not, well, we're all fucked."
A Beautiful Lie
Isla
"I didn't know about the book," Eamon tells me the second we return to our hotel room. The journey from Alastor's place to here was silent, the weight of tonight's discoveries weighing us down. There was no point in talking aboutany ofit until we locked ourselves in here for the night. Too many possible ears out in the world. "I wouldn't have hidden that from you."
One of my brows raises in disbelief as I take my shoes off, "Right. Like you've been honest about everything else?"
"Isla," he sighs my name. "When it comes to you, and your family, the ways you are in danger, I have never once been dishonest with you."
"No, you just invaded my mind, plagued me with thoughts that I believed were my own, tricked me,violatedme," the shake in my voice doesn't abate, no matter how hard I try to push through it. "You made me believe I was goingcrazy, Eamon."
"I know," he runs a hand down his face. "But that wasn't ever my intention. It started because I was worried you were keeping secrets from me. Secrets that would be dangerous. It was never supposed to be something I did long-term.
"But then... Fuck— you were so isolated. So intent on locking down everything you were feeling and doing it all alone. So I just... opened the door a little. Gave you something to fight with in your head besides yourself."
Humiliation creates a pit in my stomach.Hepried into my head and saw every nasty thing sitting in there. Every wall I've ever erected around my heart to protect myself, he knew about them and plowed right through them like they were made of paper. And I can't even bring myself to be mad at him.
It's not like I haven't kept my own secrets. And I really just don't want to fight withhim. Don't have the energy or the ambition. All I want is to be close to him, let him hold me and tell me thateverything's going tobe alright one more time.
I fight the tears clogging my throat, "I believe you."
He seems taken aback, suspicious. As he should be, honestly. "You do?"
"Yeah," I shrug, wanting nothing more than to reach for him and find comfort in his big,strongbody. "You're a stubborn ass, but I've never once thought you would do something to harm me on purpose."
He nods, taking a tentative step closer, "And the book?"
"Yeah, I believe you about that, too," I breathe.Heseems warily happy with that answer, coming closer and wrappinghis arms around me.
I sink into his embrace, soaking in his scent, his warmth, all but burying my face into his chest as he smoothes my hair down. I don't want him to ask the question, but I knew it was coming, prepared an answer for the last hour. I had a million different answers.Some petty and unkind, some trying to find humor inthe way we've bothkept things from each other.
But when he finally asks why I didn't tell him about Alastor, the truth is the only thing I can bring myself to give him, "You wouldn't have let me come," I sniffle. "I needed to be here. Ifthere wasn't some light to the end of the tunnel, some break in the monotony of living underground like that... I was going to go crazy."
"We still have to go back," he tells me. "You're still clearly very much in danger here."
The thought of being locked back in the bunker doesn't fill me with the dreadthat itused to. Part of me even longs for the comfort, the safety—to just barricade myself in and enjoy Eamon for as long as I can. But this is bigger than me, and I need to do whatever is necessary to save the others.
Eamon's mentioned more than once that we're a mirror image of each other, and that's why we butt heads so often. And I'm proud that he sees himself mirrored in me. I'mproudthat this strong, self-sacrificing, willing-to-be-the-villain man sees me for the good parts and not just the bad. I want to be everything he is,and thatmeans I can't let his need to protect me doom the others to the fate I'm avoiding by hiding with him.
