Fuck off,I tell the phantom of the bane of my existence.
His chuckle sounds so real, so acute, I look around, wondering if he's actually here, and I only thought it was in my mind. But the room remains utterly silent, completely empty.
What are you wearing?the imaginary voice asks, teasing and playful. A version of Eamon I could enjoy, were it real. I must be fucking lonely if I'm creating scenarios in my head where even he's flirting with me, no malice included.
But I'm in no mood to play along.Just leave me alone,I beg him, beg my mind to free me of his haunts when he's off enjoying himself.
You're no fun today.
Tears well, the madness of this confinement finally making me snap. Even when he leaves, I can't be free of him. I just want all of this to stop. I need silence. God, what I would give for just a moment of fucking relief.
Not only do I have to face the voice of my family members who damned me to this life, but now the demon sent to dole out the damnation haunts me, too.
Ugly, wracking sobs escape my body, the catharsis only skin deep, not even close to the level of cleansing I need to rid myself of this agony.
Isla,that stupid voice taunts again, begging me to pay attention to it, making me cry harder as I beg him to shut up, shut up,shut up!
"Isla." Strong hands land on my shoulders, his voice laced with worry.
Finally, I snap out of the madness. I glare daggers at the giant man trying to lift me off the ground, pushing his hands off of me. "What?"
"What's wrong?" He seems so confused. Which, of course, he is. He just got here to find me in hysterics on my bedroom floor. But I can't tell him about the phantom voice or the dark direction of my thoughts.
"Bel texted me," I tell him what triggered my meltdown.
A couple clueless blinks, and then he nods, "Okay... and?"
"She knows I'm lying to her." She doesn't deserve more secrets and lies. They've nearly destroyed her already.
He uses one big thumb to wipe away the tears pouring down my face, one corner of his lips lifting sadly, "I'm surprised Fritz took this long to break, honestly."
A ragged breath forces itself into my throat as I try to shove him away. "You're not funny."
"I'm a little funny," he smoothes my hair back, thankfully not commenting on the way it sticks to my face and neck, plastered there by my tears. With a heavy sigh, he pulls me into his chest. I should refuse, should push him away, but this is the first kind touch I've had in months, and I really need it. I let the tears fall into his chest, and he holds me tightly against him, letting his familiar scent surround me. "I think maybe it's time you tell her."
"What?" I sniffle, sure I misheard.
"The whole point of not telling her was to keep her from doing something reckless that would get her and her boy toys in trouble," he shrugs, not releasing me. "It kinda seems like it'sgetting to the point where she's going to come looking for you either way. And if she goes to your apartment as it is now..."
"What's wrong with my apartment?"
"Well, it's crawling with hunters searching for you, and I can't guarantee they won't touch her if she goes waltzing right up to them.Again." Fear for my best friend claws at my chest. "And it's empty, so she'll have a panic attack wondering where you are."
"So you think I should tell her?" I ask, slightly hopeful at being able to finally confide in Bel. "You're not going to like take my phone and do something to stop me from talking to her if I tell her everything?"
His chest shakes with small laughter, "No, I won't. At this point, while I don't like the idea of telling her, I think it might be the best we can do to stop the damage you two are capable of when your codependency is threatened."
"You'renotfunny," I tell him again, but I have to bite my lip to keep from chuckling. Just a little.
I don't want to find comfort in Eamon. Don't want to give him any more pieces of me besides the ones he's taken by force. But god, he smells so good, and against all odds, Idofeel safe in his arms.
"Yes, I am," he corrects me. "But you're right. Bel doesn't need any more secrets or lies."
A cold feeling slips down my spine because I mostdefinitelydid not say that part out loud.
And earlier, I could have sworn he was right here talking to me, right into my head.
Can demons read minds?
