“I would never say that,” he began as he unlocked the main door. “Don’t roll your eyes at me. Anyway, you feel how you feel. But I would wait until you’ve seen him before you decide what to do with those feelings.”
She stopped in front of his apartment before going upstairs. She was struggling. Her solution to dealing with the breakup that wrecked her had been to shut down. Eventually she started dating, but she never let her entire being go into the dates. She’d put just enough of herself into her relationship with Aiden to make it last more than just a handful of dates, but never enough to give him the power to hurt her.
“What if I’m not sure what I’m feeling?” she asked quietly.
“More reason to wait and see. Don’t give yourself an ultimatum. You’re allowed to go along for the ride. You’ll know what’s right for you.”
She watched him go into his apartment and shut the door before making her way up the stairs. He was right, as usual. She was too hard on herself. There was nothing that said she wasn’t allowed to feel whatever she felt just like there was no rule telling her she had to act on every feeling.
The hot shower she took helped to wash away her weariness. Going to Christian’s house for the first time should be exciting, not feel like she was walking the plank. He hadn’t canceled, he simply adjusted the plans. There was no reason she should assume the worst, just because she was in her feelings.
She adjusted her white cotton tunic as she stepped out of her car and stood in front of Christian’s apartment building. Her comfort clothing would always be a loose-fitting top over a soft pair of leggings, and at the moment she needed comfort. She gazed up at the older brick building with what looked like no more than two apartments per floor. A walk up. She double checked her phone before making her way toward apartment 2R.
“I’ve missed you,” he greeted as soon as he opened the door.
He pulled her into a hug before kissing her cheek and pulling her inside. She was immediately enveloped in the scent she now associated with Christian, and she fought hard to keep from closing her eyes and inhaling a deep breath. Even knowing everything he was going through, it was hard for her to not feel like she’d been getting the brush off. His warm embrace combined with the heartfelt welcome were everything she needed.
“So, what happened with your friend?” she asked. The question had burned inside her since the moment he changed their evening plans.
“Would you like something to drink?” he asked when they stopped in his small kitchen.
The kitchen overlooked a narrow tree-lined alleyway. It was late spring, and many of the trees were in full bloom, creating a beautiful backdrop of pinks and whites to go with the luscious greens. Mallory immediately fell in love with the quaint building.
“I’ll have whatever you’re having.”
Christian stepped away before returning with two small glasses and a bottle of whiskey. The hard stuff. Mallory’s trepidation creeped back into play.
“Not a whiskey drinker?” Christian asked, picking up on her unease.
“It’s not that. I’m just wondering if there’s a reason why you’re skipping wine and going straight to the hard stuff right after you decided against me meeting your best friend.”
Christian’s expression softened. His green eyes locked on hers and she felt as if he was looking through her. He set the bottle and glasses down on the small wooden table before closing the distance between them. Standing in front of her, he placed his arms around her shoulders and pulled her close. The warmth of his body gave her a sense of security when he held her close, and it also helped to calm her. Her emotions were all over the place and no amount of deep breathing and positive affirmations seemed to be able to help the way his arms did.
“Did you think I changed my mind about bringing you to meet her?”
Mallory was horrified to hear her insecurities spoken aloud. “No! It’s not that. I just thought there must be a reason you changed things up.”
“Alyssa’s best friend is getting married in Vegas in two days. Kerry and Brian should have had their wedding by now but that was a whole thing. Anyway, she thought everything would be ready and she’d be able to have you over today. I tried to tell her there was no way everything was going to go as smoothly as it was in her mind and that she’d be packed and ready to go. The wedding is in Vegas, but the reception will be here next weekend. Worst case scenario, you’ll meet her at the reception, if you’ll go with me. I can’t wait to show you off.”
“Oh,” Mallory breathed.
“Yes,” he echoed. “Oh.”
Christian sat down in one of the chairs at his table and pulled Mallory into his lap. She followed him without any resistance. The words of advice from Dan rang in her mind as she settled into his lap.
She shivered when he nipped at her neck, just below her ear, his nose teasing his way through her thick waves. She closed her eyes and relished his nearness, his breath a tickle against her neck. All of her insecurities vanished when she was safely in his hold.
“You hungry?” he asked.
The double meaning was not lost on her. Yes, she was hungry. She hadn’t eaten dinner yet, and she was also hungry for him. She could practically feel his hands on her every time she closed her eyes and lost herself in memories from the other night, seeing everything as if she was a spectator and had been watching the entire thing. She was most definitely hungry in every sense of the word.
“Always,” she finally answered.
“There is one thing I need to tell you.”
Goosebumps spread across her flesh as his words sank in. She had a feeling he was keeping something from her. She had a fine-tuned gut instinct and learned not to ignore it, but sometimes it was hard to tell the difference between nerves and a true premonition.
“What is it?” she asked.
