Charlie commandeered the remote and put a reality show on as she chatted away about plans for the following day. “I’m so excited. I can’t wait to see what you think of everyone. Not to mention, there are some pretty hot guys from the SC charter. All of the guys here are off-limits. They view me as a sister, but the other charter is an open buffet for Charlie girl.” I laughed at her outrageous statement, but was happy she was excited.
She hadn’t expressed any interest in dating after her disaster with Theo. I fell asleep as Charlie was trying to explain something called Scandoval and woke up with her arm across my face and a knee in my back.Note to self: get an air mattress for future sleepovers.
I couldn’t believe that was something I was thinking about that late in life, but it made me happy. It felt like those pieces of my childhood that I thought were stolen from me, were still available. It was never too late to make friends, girl talk overjunk food, stay up too late, and go on new adventures. Speaking of, thoughts of the night’s party started drifting through my mind.
There were butterflies in my stomach as I lay in bed thinking about the day ahead of us. The trip to the clubhouse would vastly differ from my Sunday afternoon there, and I wasn’t sure how to feel about that.
Bull’s warning weighed heavily in my mind. I knew he was being kind, trying to prepare me, and I was grateful. It didn’t make my anxiety and apprehension disappear, though. For the first time in my life, I was more than willing to push through it. Everything I had seen of the club and the members so far had only enriched my life. I knew the invitation to the cookout was a pretty big gesture, especially coming from the president.
Charlie snored in my face, and I couldn’t help but chuckle. I could handle whatever came at me because I knew I had people at my back. Charlie, Match, and Bull had made their stance as my protectors clear.
Even without them, I wanted to go so I could be there for Bash. It was a huge part of his world. If we were going to see us through, it would become a part of mine as well. That idea was slowly becoming less and less alarming.
Bash
Fiona was turning out to be everything I had hoped for and more. I had been drawn to her since that first meeting, and I was kicking myself for not acting on my feelings sooner. The more time I spent with her, the closer she let me get, and the more addicted I became.
Finding out she was a virgin unleashed a primal part of me that hadn’t been there before. I wanted to claim her in every wayimaginable, loved the idea of being her one and only, even if that made me a caveman. She was slowly becoming my everything, and that need to tie her to me was only growing.
Images of her punk coworker drifted through my mind, and anger would wash over me. I hated seeing anyone’s hands on her, and that fueled my decision to visit her office. When I arrived on her floor, I didn’t miss the stares and murmurs from her coworkers.
Women ogled me, men frowned, but I only had eyes for my girl. She was oblivious to the tension around her, focused on whatever she was working on. As soon as I got close to her cubicle, a part of me calmed down.
I watched her for a minute, waiting for her to notice me there. When she spun around in her chair, she looked angry, but her emotion quickly shifted to delight. She instantly became flustered, and it was adorable. I loved being able to read all her emotions as quickly as they crossed her face. She was so expressive.
Despite the eyes on us, I couldn’t help but kiss her as soon as she was in reach.I am marking my territory,I thought, remembering how it felt as I walked her across the floor to the elevator, her small form snuggled tightly against my side. Something as simple as a quick lunch together proved to be one of the best dates in my life.
Talking with Fiona was an entirely new experience. There was something about her that made you want to rip yourself wide open and bare your soul. She asked questions about the club and my role in it, but in a way that I knew was genuine. She wasn’t a patch chaser—not that she even knew what that was.
Her concern regarding my workload since becoming VP was heartwarming. It was nice to be able to share with her. As I verbalized all the changes that had happened in the past year, Irealized just how far I had come. It may have been early, but she was changing me, in a good way.
When we first met, I felt like I was drowning in my responsibilities. I spent all day exhausted, waiting to get home, only to spend the nights awake, worrying about Dad, Charlie, the garage, the club, and everything in between. The more I saw of Fiona, the more it felt like I was finding my equilibrium.
A visit with her was like a mix of Xanax and caffeine. Instead of draining me, she was filling up my energy tank while simultaneously acting like a balm to my spinning mind. It allowed me to calmly revisit issues without losing my cool or letting personal emotions get in the way. After time with Fee, I felt like I could face anyone.
Somewhere after Fiona entered our lives, it felt like both Charlie and I were able to move forward and slowly break the cycle we had gotten into of late. It wasn’t perfect, but over time, I believed we could break some old habits and make room for better ones. Charlie and I were talking more. I was less worried about her, and it took some of the weight off my shoulders.
There was just one more conversation Charlie and I needed to have. It was the day after I visited Fee for lunch, and I couldn’t help but remember her slipup a few nights earlier regarding Charlie’s desire to go back to school. I ran out to pick up a pizza, hoping to convince my sister to talk to me.
“Hey, I got a pizza from Lino’s for lunch. Wanna eat in the office with me?” I asked her.
Lino’s was her favorite. There was no way she would decline. Shortly after, we sat in my office scarfing down slices before any of the Brothers came sniffing around for a piece. As I finished my third slice, I took a minute to focus on Charlie.
“Can I ask you a question?”
She looked at me dubiously before replying, “If it’s about Fiona, probably not,” she said, and I smiled, grateful she was loyal to my girl.
“No, it’s a personal question. It’s, well… are you happy here? At the garage? I don’t want you to feel like you have to work here.” The surprise on her face was like a stab. I hadn’t ever questioned her working the front desk. She had always seemed sort of undecided about her future.
“Am I doing something wrong? Do you want me to leave?” Charlie said, her face looking crestfallen.
“Charlie, no. Fuck, I’m messing all of this up. I guess what I’m saying is that I think I know working reception at the garage is not something you want to do forever. If there is something else you want to do, I just want you to know I will help and support you any way I can. You won’t disappoint me or make me angry if you leave.” She was studying me, her face a mix of emotions.
“What did Fiona tell you?” she asked, and I sighed.
“Nothing,” I said, and Charlie raised an eyebrow, calling my bluff.
“She didn’t really say anything to me, she was just sort of muttering to herself about you and school.” Charlie sighed and sat back in her seat.
