‘Mum?’ Liv said, as she watched a tear trickle down her mum’s cheek. ‘Are you okay?’
Carol nodded slightly, then sniffed. ‘We’d agreed to meet at the park gates,to walk to the theatre together,’ she said, her voice quavering. ‘We’d been having a few arguments and your dad bought me the tickets to say sorry.
‘He was late and I stood there waiting for him, for well over half an hour. I was annoyed at him but worried, too. When he didn’t arrive, I set off on my own.’
Liv frowned. It didn’t sound like her dad to leave her mum waiting. ‘What had you been arguing about?’ she said.
‘The amount of time he spent at work.’ Carol sighed. ‘He always gave his students his full attention, nurturing their talent. Some were needier than others. He thought I was fine at home. I had cleaning jobs, I had you, I belonged to a book club. But I felt neglected by him, unfulfilled somehow, and I told him so. Several times. Things changed for a little while, then slipped again. I felt like I might be losing him…’
Liv knew how that felt. Jake seemed to be drifting away from her, too. ‘What happened?’ she said.
‘I tried to shock him, I suppose. I gave him an ultimatum, even mentioned divorce. I made an appointment to see a solicitor. I didn’t mean it, of course, just wanted him to listen and notice me again. Take things seriously. And it worked. He apologized, said he hadn’t been thinking clearly. He was under a lot of strain at work. He still wanted me, and our family, just as it was. He bought me the theatre tickets and things got much better.’
‘So, why did he leave you waiting?’
Carol chewed the inside of her cheek. ‘To this day, I don’t know, love. I reached the theatre and hung around outside. The time grew closer to the start of the performance and he still didn’t arrive. I didn’t want to sit on my own and watch the show,so I went home instead. There was a call from the hospital, saying your dad had been admitted. When I got there, it was too late…’ Carol started to cry properly now. Diners looked over at her. ‘I should have waited for him at the park gates,’ she wept.
Liv moved her chair around the table. She put her arm around her mum and passed her a napkin to use as a tissue. ‘I’m so sorry, Mum. It wasn’t your fault. It was purely an accident.’
The two women sat hunched together until Carol let her breath go. She patted the back of Liv’s hand. ‘If things are rocky between you and Jake, try to sort them out, eh, love? But don’t rely on him for your happiness. You have to find your own path, too.’
‘I will do.’ Liv gathered the photos and tickets together and put them back in the box. She put on the lid. ‘Can I take this to look at another time?’
‘Of course. That’s why I brought it,’ Carol said, dabbing the corner of her eye. ‘I could do with a strong coffee.’
Liv looked around at all the chrome and glass. ‘Shall we go someplace else?’
‘Let’s stay here. I can show all the other diners I’m okay. I can feel them looking at me.’
They ordered coffee and laughed at the size of the tiny cups.
‘Deary me, it’s like a thimble,’ Carol said, her eyes still pink.
Liv grinned, too, glad her mum felt better. Even so, she couldn’t help thinking about why her dad had left her waiting.
When the bill arrived, Carol whipped it off the plate.
‘Mum, I’m paying,’ Liv said, trying to grab it.
Carol held it out of reach. As she unfolded the paper, the colour drained from her face. ‘Oh, my,’ she gasped. ‘We’ll have to do the washing up.’
Liv took it from her and felt like her rib cage was shrinking. Their lunch had cost a fortune, plus had a fifteen per cent service charge. She hadn’t expected it to be so much.
‘Blimey,’ Carol said.
Liv reached down for her handbag and missed the handle. ‘Don’t worry. Essie’s been very generous recently,’ she said, her voice almost a squeak.
‘Well, I’ve got to contribute something.’ Carol pushed a ten-pound note into her hand. ‘Get Essie a little bunch of flowers, to say thanks for the table.’
After Liv called a taxi and made sure her mum was safely inside, she needed to walk around and get some fresh air. She hated to think there had been some kind of discord between her parents when her dad died.
She wandered around the area, until she got disorientated. When she saw a blue florist sign that said,BLOOM AND DALE, Liv recognized it from the tag on the bouquet of white roses Chloe brought to the flat. She still had her mum’s money in her fist and headed into the shop.
A young woman with tight black curls stood arranging carnations in a bucket. Her name badge said SAM. ‘Can I help?’ she said.
‘I’m looking for a small bunch of flowers.’ Liv looked blankly around the shop, at bunches of red roses, and heart-shaped balloons, thinking she couldn’t actually give any of them to Essie.
‘I’ve just made up a few summertime sprays, white roses, carnations and gypsophila. They’re really cute and only cost nine pounds.’
