“Holy shit,” Violet whispered next to me.
Bren’s head wobbled back and forth as his chin sank into his chest. “Sage, I’m going to marry you one day…” he slurred lazily. His glazed eyes seemed to crawl over my body, repulsing me so much that bile burned in the back of my throat.
“You’re not the marrying kind,” I shook my head, stunned. Was this why Bren was the way he was? How long had he been doing this stuff? How often? How could I have not known? Sometimes, people only take the time to see what they want to see, I suppose.
His head lolled heavily against his shoulder. “I’ll never let you leave me, Sage.”
Grabbing Violet’s hand, I tugged her off the couch, “Let’s go.” I gently pushed her in front of me and practically shoved her out of Bren’s living room. When I got to the door, I felt a pair of heavy hands grabbing the back of my arms; fingers digging sharply into my skin and pulling me back in. Whoever it was twisted my arm, meaning to cause me pain. “Where do you think you ladies are going?”
The meaty hands gripped harder, spun me around, and shoved me roughly against the wall next to the door. Violet screamed out next to me, when a thick, fisted hand hit the wall next to my head.
Without even thinking, I balled my fist tight and swung, hitting my assailant, hard, along the bridge of his nose. A spray of blood spurted across his face as he grunted and fell backward.
Matt.
I gently pushed Violet out into the hallway and turned to face him head-on.
Holding his broken nose in one hand, he grabbed me with his other hand, “You stupid cunt! I’m going to kill you!” Pain tore up my arm as he squeezed my flesh and tried lifting me up off the floor.
With an open hand, I shoved my palm straight against his bloody nose; he dropped to the floor with a sickening crunch, out cold. Then, everything seemed to move in slow motion; everything quieted, dulled down like time had stopped.
Bren still sat on the couch, watching through dull, empty eyes.
Lola giggled, slowly snorting another line of cocaine.
Jett laughed silently, slowly slapping at his knees.
A few people I knew, Bren’s friends, pointed, laughing at Matt, like insane, scary-ass clowns at one of those freak-ass carnivals.
One man stood to my left; he stood out like the summer sun on a cold winter day. Sandy blond hair, blue eyes, crouched down low, hands reaching into the back waistband of his pants, waiting to jump in and help me, the only one ready to defend me in a room packed full of people.
Violet was yelling my name, pulling me out of my trance. I winked at the gorgeous blond, who immediately straightened up, smiled at me, and looked around to see who was watching him.
Then I walked out the door.
Bren didn’t follow me. Didn’t check to see if I was okay. Didn’t jump in to defend me–not that I needed it–but still.
It was easy to walk away from Bren’s apartment that night. AndI knew Bren; he wasn’t someone you could expect more from. But what hurt me was that I wanted more from him. I needed more from him.
And he wouldn’t give more.
I wanted to punch myself in the face. I didn’t want to be one of those girls who needed to be rescued. I didn’t want to be one of those girls whowantedto be rescued. I wanted to be the heroine of one of those books where I rescued myself. I didn’t want to be one of those girls who stood FOREVER and waited until some dumbass knight in shining armor just happened upon me. I wanted to be the hero of my own story. I didn’t want to be saved by someone else.
But still, it would have been nice for the guy who was supposed to be in love with me to make sure I was okay, or stand up for me in some way.
“Oh. Oh. Oh. My GOD!” Violet freaked as soon as we hit the sidewalk in front of Bren’s apartment building. “You just kicked the crap out of Matt! What the Hell?”
Looking straight ahead, I kept walking down the block, not answering her. Well, I couldn’t really. I was wound up tight; pure adrenaline surged through my arms, anger boiling just under the surface of my skin. I walked faster.
At the corner, Violet jumped in front of me, arms up, hands waving in front of my face. “Charlotte! Holy crap!” She held her hands out to stop me from walking. “I have never seen you go all animal like that! You knocked him out. Howdid you do that?Is that from your karate classes? Because I think you need to sign my ass up!”
Taking a deep breath, I stopped trying to move forward, “No Violet, it’s from seeing too many people being bullied and pushed around in my life to let anyone ever again hurt me…or someone I love.”
Wordlessly, I continued to my apartment; Violet trailed quietly behind me. I didn’t know how much she really knew about me. No one really knows what other people know about you, what has been said about you behind your back, what secrets you don’t realize you’ve let slip. But, she walked so quietly behind me, I wondered if she knew, if she understood why I was the way I was. Or maybe she was just reflecting quietly on her own life. Nobody ever really knows.
Once in my apartment, I headed straight for my bathroom and ran the water until it was icy cold and splashed it over my face.
I looked up at the mirror and stared at the reflection. My arms were already bruised with purple handprints. It was okay, I thought; I defended my friend and myself before he could hurt either one of us. I stared at my bruises. Okay, before he couldseriouslyhurt one of us.
