My head snapped up to see Callie standing in front of the park bench I was sitting on. Addison was on the swings with another little girl she just met, and Ben was fast asleep in the stroller. And no, the bag was full of goldfish crackers—the only thing I’d eaten allday.
Callie? How does she have the ability to show up when I’m at mylowest?
The sky was darkening around her, and I blinked quickly, trying to clear the fog in my head. We were probably at the park for way too long; the last thing I remember was the sun warming my skin, the anger and hurt simmering justunderneath.
“Are you okay?” Callie was jogging in place, her chest bouncing at an X-rated rate. The clingy material of her shorts hugged her skin—wet skin—sweaty wet skin all down her legs and across her chest. It was like she was glistening in the setting sun, the epitome of health andbeauty.
Wonder if she ever tookdrugs?
“We get tested, randomly. I’d lose myjob.”
Shit. I asked that out loud.What’s happening to my life?I’m losing it, that’s what’shappening.
“How’d adventures in catching a babysitter go today?” Her smile brightened the whole park. She stopped jogging and stretched. I couldn’t formwords.
“Dylan?”
“Huh?”
“Did you find a babysitter?” she asked, sitting next to me on thebench.
“One woman was older than dirt. The VIP day care on Tenth Street is infested with bedbugs and closed until further notice. And Babywatch.com will charge me more money than I make in a week to watch two kids under the age offour.”
“Oh—”
“I took the kids to try and see their mother today, who was too fucking high to stand up straight.” I laughed darkly at the shocked expression that crawled across her face. “She told me she wanted a divorce. She hated me. Never wanted to have thekids.”
“Oh,Dylan—”
"Oh, no. It gets better. All the time, I thought she was clean? All the rehab I’ve been paying off and the bail money? That was all for nothing. Because she never stopped. I just didn't notice because..." I leaned forward and jammed my finger into the wood of the bench as I spoke. "Because I am a selfishprick."
Callie twisted around on the bench to face me. “You? A selfishprick?”
"I went home, and I went through all the bills. My bills haven't gotten paid –none of them– in months. All the jewelry, everything valuable in the house is gone.” I ran my hands through my hair and rubbed at my forehead. There had been a jackhammer in my skull all day. “I was too busy working double shifts for the last few years, and I was too selfish and too much of a prick tonotice.”
“Look, Dylan. I get five vacation weeks a year. I haven’t taken any. I could take off a few days to helpyou—”
I put my hand over hers. It was purely innocent, just showing someone gratitude; letting her know her thoughtfulness moved me. What I hadn't expected was the intense electrical current that surged across my skin as I touched her or the way my entire body ached with need for a moment where I could just let go of everything shitty and press my body against hers, my lips againsthers.
I needed to backaway.
Her eyes locked with mine and widened. She felt it, too, didn't she? This live wire between us. Whether it was born of loneliness or grief, I couldn't say. But it was real, and it thickened the air around us. Goosebumps puckered along her skin, and she shivered slightly. It was cold, and she was still slick with sweat, but the way she looked back at me, that shocked sort ofoh shitexpression, I knew she felt the sameway.
I needed to back away and let go of her hand—tell her I’m sorry for the touch—I’m sorry for getting her involved.I’m sorry my wife was a junkie and my kids rang yourdoorbell.
I choked out a small gasp. I couldn’t say any of those things. I was too overwhelmed with the heat radiating up my arm from her and the overpowering urge to be burned byit.
“You’re single with no kids—no responsibilities—your vacations should be spent on beaches with margaritas in yourhands.”
Her gaze dropped instantly, and her face flushed with color.Did I somehow hurt her feelings?I didn’t mean to. With all she had done for me already, the last thing I wanted to do was hurther.
“Callie! Callie! Callie!” Addison squealed as she barreled into us, eyes sparkling and cheeks gleaming. “Did you come to get us because it’s bedtime? Will you read me a story,pwease?”
Callie eyes darted quickly up to mine, waiting for me to answer. She was definitely hurt by whatever I said before. She really wanted to help me. She really liked the kids and they really likedher.
I nodded my head, and the smile I got in return wasstunning.
“I sure can. Come on,” she said, taking Addison’s hand. “Let’s get you home and cleaned up for astory.”
