Chapter 9
Callie
Saturday,work was a shit show. The squad room was a circus packed full of animals, and I couldn't concentrate on anything I was doing. My mind was still in the house across the street from mine, playing with two of the cutest kids I evermet.
“What are you smiling at?” Ryan wheeled his chair next to me, trying to get a better look at my cellphone.
Crap. Without even realizing, I sat at my desk, staring down at a photo on my phone that I snapped of Addison holding Ben.Damn, now wasn’t a good time to hear Ryan start whining at me about this. I nudged him away with my elbow and blackened myscreen.
“I wasn’t smiling,” I said, annoyed. I added an eye roll to show him how irritating hewas.
“Yeah, you were. Smiling like an idiot. I even saw teeth, without your lips being all snarled up, like they usuallyare.”
“Jackass. God, Ryan, sometimes I just want to…” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Make sure you’re an organ donor, because if I one day snap onyou—”
“Of course I’m an organ donor.” He smirked at me and gestured to himself. “Who wouldn’t want a piece ofthis?”
Typical Ryan Cage answer. “You’re not getting the point. Go away.” I laughed athim.
“You’renot getting the point, Pop-Tart.” He plucked the phone out of my hands and held it between us. His voice took on a perceptually low whisper. “You’re sitting in front of me, staring at a picture of two children, and I just don’t want you to gethurt.”
I stared back blankly at him. My first instinct was to scream at him as heat rose to my cheeks, but I knew deep down somewhere inside of me he was just trying to protect me from mythoughts.
But really, how did he think I would gethurt?
“Cage, I’m good. I got this.” I thumbed in the passcode on my screen and showed him the picture. “These kids are precious, and if I could help them in any way I can, I will. Nothing more than me doing my job.” I stood up and slipped my phone into my pocket. I needed this conversation to end. “I have to go get Kannon’s approval on something. I’ll catch youlater.”
I didn’t look at him as I stood up. I didn't want to see the worry on his face. Ryan Cage was one of those guys who wore his feelings in his features. If he was worried about me, I didn't want to witness it. I didn't want to question myself and my motives for helping a family in need. I was good with kids, that'sit.
And they needed a mom, a good mom.I would have been a goodmom.
My feet tripped over each other at the thought, appalled at myself for thinking it. They had a mother, I knew they did, and I didn't believe they needed some replacement oranything…
Heat flushed through my chest, and sweat burst across my forehead. I didn’t want Ryan to be right, that there was something to be worried about. No one needed to worry about me. I was fine.I neededair.
I barged into Sergeant Kannon’s office without knocking and swung the door closed behind me in a rush. Behind his desk, Kannon choked out a surprised gasp and fumbled with something in his hands. Whatever the object was, it dropped down hard with a clank. Instantly, the small office smelled likewhiskey.
“Really?” I asked, motioning to what I quickly realized was aflask.
“I’m here in the office all day. I’m not going out, and it’s only foremergencies.”
His tone was on autopilot—a repeat offender excuse—it probably wasn’t the first time he got caught drinking alcohol on job time. But I was one of his subordinates, and I was sure he was humiliated as hell because of it. I swept my eyes down submissively, feeling awful that I hadn’t knocked. It was unprofessional and demonstrated how emotional I was acting because of what Cage had said a few momentsbeforehand.
Around the flask, Kannon’s fingers trembled. He was either terrified – which wasn't believable in my opinion, since I once watched him smile at a perp who pulled a gun out on him – or he really, physically needed that drink. I chose the latter to believe; his breath always hinted of a severe liquiddiet.
I cleared my throat and smiled half-heartedly. "If I have to keep your secret, you could at least give me asip.”
He exhaled with a loud sigh. Sliding the flask across the desk toward me, his shoulders loosened and his lips tugged up in a small smile. "Our secret." He leaned back in his chair, folded his arms across his chest, and watched me take the tiniest sip of his drink. "So Ward, why did you just bust through my door likethat?"
My throat was on fire.What the hell kind of whiskey wasthat?
“Cage was, uh, getting on my nerves.” I plunked the flask back down in front of him and swallowed a few times to try and get the taste out of mymouth.
He narrowed his eyes at me. “Take a seat,” he said, jutting his chin at a chair against the wall. “What’s goingon?”
"Ryan is just overstepping with advice I don'tneed."
Kannon took a deep breath and chewed on his lower lip, “He’s worried about you in someway?”
