Luerna giggled, adoring her younger brother’s way with words.
“I’d like to have him over. You think he will meet with me? Levka and I didn’t get off to a good start. But I’m not as immature as I used to be.”
“Immature? Never,” Luerna mocked, earning a look of annoyance that she smiled at. To soothe his ego, she added, “You have changed, Adrik. But a wife and a daughter will do that to you.” The look her words received confused her. The flash of pain on his brow was hidden as he leaned over the papers on his desk. “Did I say something wrong?”
He was hesitant, but forced out, “I suppose you’ll hear about it eventually. Mama plans to visit for the holidays.” Whatever he had to say was difficult, for he stared at the table before him, not really seeing. His hands rolled into fists. “Katia was cheating on me.”
Luerna was frozen, in disbelief, hurt on a different scale. She didn’t know what to say at first but wondered why Katia was still alive. She wanted to hurt the woman herself. “That’s bullshit,” Luerna bit. “And I’ve been fucking nice to her. Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
Adrik gave a weak smile as he sat back in his chair.
Luerna stood, enflamed by it. She paced the floor, cursing Katia’s name and saying many damaging words that Adrik simply listened to. She didn’t want to talk to Katia or even have her in the same house. But this was Yakov’s house, Adrik’s house, and what she wanted didn’t matter. He was staying with that terrible woman for whatever reason, pretending, enduring because that’s what family did. He’d be unhappy for the rest of his life, but that’s the sacrifice one makes to be a Morozov.
It hit her hard, and she sat back down, realizing the significance of her actions. What gave her the right to seek happiness when her little brother was putting up with a cheating harlot as a wife? She was selfish and wretched.
And a hypocrite.That thought tasted bitter in her mouth.
“The contract that was compiled requires twenty years,” he admitted with defeat. “Papa won’t approve a divorce.”
Luerna sagged in the chair. It was depressing to see Adrik, a man capable of almost anything, cave to their father’s will. If he couldn’t get out of Yakov’s hold, what could any of them do?
Adrik changed the topic. “Have you been alright here?”
With a breath in her lungs, she pretended and said what was expected of her. “It’s lonely without the family, but we’re fine. Everyone’s happy.”
He nodded, watching her, as if he could read through her. And she knew he could. He had that annoying ability to notice the little things. Luerna looked away.
“Rurik has told me things, Luerna.”
Her eyes snapped up. She already knew what Adrik was going to say and yet she asked anyway, hoping it wasn’t what she thought. “What kind of things?”
“That you tried to kill yourself a while back.”
She sneered. “It was postpartum depression. I didn’t really have much control. He’s an ass for even saying anything.”
Adrik nodded, but it was a patronizing nod. Luerna quickly added, “I’m better now. We are done having kids. I’m on birth control. Everything’s good. I’m fine, Adrik.”
Adrik leaned up, setting his arms on the table. “I’m not Papa, Luerna. You don’t have to convince me. But what I was thinking was if you wanted a bigger role in the family. Besides, you know, breeding.”
She snickered, hating it and yet cherishing his straightforward honesty. “Like what?”
“I would, of course, have to get it approved by Papa. But I was thinking of charities. Or you could do something with horses if that suits you better. We could use the PR. My uncles are too obvious in their endeavors. If we have nothing positive to contribute to Russia, someone might have a problem with us.”
“Rurik won’t–”
“I’ll deal with him. Would it be something you would like to do?”
A smile twisted on her lips. A job. An actual job that didn’t require her on her back. She could contribute to the Morozov name in more ways than one. And she could make a name for herself that wasn’t entirely based on who she married or whose daughter she was. Though she had no experience or education to aid, Luerna jumped at the chance. “Yes. A thousand times, yes.”
She listened to every idea, and excitement bubbled up, encouraging her own thoughts about what she could possibly do to bring some positive light to their family. For an hour, she went on, writing down everything she thought of and bouncing ideas off of Adrik. He was brilliant in his thoughts, and she couldn’t help but think she was, too. She was impressed with herself. A spark of who she could have been. A wisp of hope of who she could still be.
But it only worked if she stayed in the family.
If she ruined this by getting caught with Levka, she’d never be able to salvage it.
Luerna was walking out of the room with her notebook in hand, and for one moment, a spark of a thought froze her. She should tell Adrik about Levka. He could fix it.
She turned to him and stalled. Yakov’s eyes burned into her from over her shoulder.
