After they said he’d be up in a minute, Luerna paced the room in wait. It was a dangerous game she was playing. Even thinking of doing something with another man was terrifying. If Rurik ever found out, she’d never be allowed out of the house again. She’d be a prisoner in her own home.
That’s if Levka even likes me anymore.
Why would he even like her in the first place? He was ten years younger than her, surely he was around attractive, younger women all the time. Why would he choose a used-up, four-kids-deep, mentally screwed woman like her?
He wouldn’t. Whatever Kira thought she heard had to be wrong.
A knock on the wall beside her bed sounded. At first, she wasn’t sure, and then it began to move. Levka stuck his head in.
She gaped at him. “Why couldn’t you tell me this was here?”
“No strippers?”
“They are currently making love to my sister.”
Levka winced. “All of them?”
She giggled. “She’s gonna be sore in the morning.”
“I’ll send up breakfast with some pain relievers.” Levka stepped in, closing the wall but staying beside it as he slipped his hands into his pockets. “The front desk said you asked for me.”
Levka prepared himself for another pathetic plea to escape. Didn’t she understand that if he could give her the freaking sun, he would? But there were things he couldn’t do, and risking her safety was one of them.
Seeing her fully dressed eased a terrible ache in his stomach. For the last hour, all he could think about were the hookers he sent to her room. Thinking back on it, he couldn’t believe he did such a thing, but it aligned with how he’d do anything for her. If fucking a stranger was something she wanted to do, then he’d set it up. Even as it destroyed him from the inside out.
Luerna sat in a chair, curling her leg into her chest and staring at him. The single side light cast him in a shadow that illuminated every muscle beneath his white dress shirt. The few buttons at the top were undone, exposing the barest of his pectoral and the familiar tattoo that snuck through. She allowed herself to acknowledge that he was gorgeous, and it no longer felt wrong. Being ten years older than him now when he was twenty-two didn’t bother her as much as it had.
“My sister told me what you did. About the rape.”
Levka clenched his teeth, hoping there was nothing more to add.
“And why.”
Those words were a punch to the gut, and Levka leaned back against the wall. He stared at the floor. She knew he was in love with her. He felt exposed like all his intestines were spewing from his gut, landing at her feet.
But it was a relief. Levka closed his eyes and breathed out. He was empty now, a cracked egg without a yoke. And surprisingly, he loved the feeling. It was a secret he kept for too long.
Levka didn’t want it to matter. He ‘was’ in love with her, meaning he had no feelings for her now. But that wasn’t true, was it? How had it lasted all this time? He had gone through hell. He changed and grew in ways that he sometimes didn’t recognize himself.
And now, after all that time, here he was, still completely in love with her.
Levka lifted his gaze, unsure if she could see it. She was watching him. The dim light kept most of her emotions in the dark, but her eyes were bright like a blue spotlight, and he knew, even from miles away, she would be able to see it.
Luerna stood up.
She reached behind her and pulled at the zipper on the back of her jumper. He could hear it from here as it slid down. He swallowed harshly, keeping his eyes pinned on hers, wishing she would say more and expose more than she had. Was she really coming on to him? He didn’t want to misconstrue her movements, but he felt powerless, caught in a spider’s web.
Perhaps that’s how she liked it–complete and utter control.
Luerna pushed the sleeves off her shoulders, and the outfit pooled at her feet, exposing her body. She wore only a thin blue thong and heels. Luerna waited for him to look her over, but he didn’t. Levka was searching her face for answers. Why was she doing this? What did she want?
This wasn’t like her at all. Something else must be wrong.
Luerna stepped out of her clothes and moved toward him. He straightened up, his hands still in his pockets, his body stiff and guarded.
“Luerna,” he murmured, shaking his head. He wanted to talk her out of this. She didn’t know him. She had no feelings for him, and yet here she was trying to sleep with him. Luerna couldn’t possibly understand the danger she was putting them in just by him being in her room.
Had she thought any further than just sleeping together? She could destroy all the progress he’s made. He couldn’t go back to being a beggar on the street. He couldn’t risk his father’s welfare anymore. Not only that, but Luerna had a family to tend to. Levka would never be a part of that. Could he live as a sidepiece? Or was this just a one-time fling, something to get out of her system? Could his pride handle that? Could he let her go after finally having her?
