“I know. I take care of me and keep you safe.” He looked around the room. “It best I not be here.” He hated the thought of leaving. It tore at him. Nobody made him feel like Atlas did… and that was the problem. He couldn’t bear having Atlas hurt because of him, but it was so hard to explain.
Atlas crossed his arms over his chest. “I know what you’re doing, and it’s bullshit. And you know it. That man has nothing to do with you. I arrested him last year after a six-month investigation. He was running drugs through town, and I took him out. Apparently he got out on parole and decided to come after me. He’s going back to prison.”
Bazel swallowed. “He not here because of me?”
“No. This had nothing to do with you. Police officers make a lot of enemies, and sometimes they aren’t exactly right in the head. This man is crazy. I think he sold drugs and used his own product and it hurt his brain.”
“Oh,” he said softly, looking at the clothes. “So I can stay?” He had been so scared, he had let his fear make his decisions for him.
Atlas kept his arms crossed over his chest. “There are going to be some rules.” Bazel swallowed. “First, no leaving without talking to me first. I have lots of friends on the force, and if you are in danger, we will find a place to keep you safe. Second, when you’re scared, you can talk to me about it. You don’t have to do this alone.”
“And three?” He blinked at how mad Atlas looked, and then he smiled. “You have to remember that you are wanted here. But if you really want to go, the door is always open. Just make sure it’s what you really want, not what you’re afraid of.”
Bazel nodded. “I just so frightened. What if you or Evie get hurt because of me?”
“First thing, if anyone does get hurt, it’s because of the people doing the hurting, not you or me. So don’t take on something that isn’t your fault. It’s theirs. That’s the trap.”
Bazel didn’t understand at all. “Huh?”
“If you take on the responsibility for their actions, then you let them off the hook. Do you see?” Bazel shook his head because he still didn’t understand. “Okay. You are responsible for whatyoudo, not what someone else does,” Atlas told him gently.
“So what these men do isn’t my fault.” He said the words as though he were trying to convince himself as much as anything else. “But… what they want from me?”
“Today had nothing to do with you at all. And we have Wendell in custody now. Apparently he’s wanted in Florida as well as by the federal government, so he isn’t going to be going anywhere for a while. The various departments are looking into the trafficking further, but progress is slow. The federal agencies are hoping to catch them once the ship comes back into port.”
“What does all that mean?” Bazel asked.
“That us finding you here in Carlisle is a smaller piece of a larger picture. We need to keep you safe while the other departments figure out what is happening. It stinks, because I really want to be able to have all the answers, and I can’t right now. Though I want you to know that you have helped a lot.”
Bazel was feeling more comfortable now, his heart pounding a lot less, and he could think. “So you….” He didn’t quite know what to say. Bazel wanted things to feel like they had before the man tried to get in, before he got so scared and made a fool of himself. He really felt kind of dumb. “You not mad?”
Atlas grinned and shook his head. “No. I’m not mad. I wish that idiot would have thought before trying to break into apoliceman’s house. I can make a call and have my fellow officers here very quickly. I’m also pissed because he interrupted us.”
“Me too.” But he just couldn’t seem to get what happened out of his mind. It was like it was always there, the fear and the worry, waiting like a weed for the chance to grow. That was far too hard for him to explain. Sometimes he just didn’t have the words.
“This is a lot for you to take in right now, and you probably need a chance to think.”
Bazel nodded. That he did. Atlas’s hands slipped off his shoulders, and Bazel instantly missed them. “Don’t go.” He sighed, and Atlas returned, sliding his hands around his waist and just standing with him. “It easier to think with you here.”
“Why is that?” Atlas whispered.
“Because I feel safe,” he answered, as honestly as he could. If Bazel had left, he had no idea where he would have gone or how he would have gotten anywhere. It was all fear that was trying to make the decisions—the wrong ones.
Chapter 11
THE SIGHTof Bazel getting ready to leave had been almost enough to stop Atlas’s heart, and his first reaction had been hurt and anger. He had done so much for him… and Bazel was ready to just run away. Truthfully, it had made him angry, and as he stood quietly with Bazel and thought about it, his reaction felt stupid. Of course he would be scared; anyone would be. Wendell had been trying to find him, and god knows what he would have done if he had gotten his hands on Bazel. The thought sent a shiver through him.
“Are you cold?” Bazel asked. “It hot out here. You getting sick?”
“No. I was scared for a moment. I’m fine now.”
Bazel turned around, those huge brown eyes looking up at him. “You get scared too? But you big and strong and no one can hurt you.”
“Of course I get scared. We all do.”
“Were you scared of that man?” Bazel asked.
“Not really.” He didn’t want to talk about it. Bazel didn’t need him putting his crap at his feet. His issues were his own, and they were small in the grand scheme of things. He might have overreacted, but the thought of Bazel leaving left him cold. “I know how to deal with bad guys. It’s what I’m trained to do.” What he wasn’t prepared for was to have his heart broken. Maybe he was being completely stupid, letting his heart get involved in a situation like this. Bazel had just cometo this country, and he had whole worlds to explore and a ton of decisions to make. What in the hell was he doing, expecting Bazel to stay here? There were so many options. He had his entire life ahead of him. What the hell was Atlas thinking?
