“I think it’s time for some aftercare while you come down.”
I blink at him in confusion.
“It’s common for submissives to enter a state of euphoria during an intense scene. Based on the way your pupils are dilated, I’m guessing you’re feeling pretty good right now. Maybe like you’re a little drunk or high?”
“Is this subspace?” I rasp, surprised by the sound of my voice. “I read about this.”
He chuckles. “Of course you did. Ever the astute teacher’s pet.”
“I love it when you use big words when you say nice things to me. It’s sexy.” I giggle.
“Then allow me to elucidate how incredible you are. Meticulous. Fulgent. Ebullient.”
“You know those aren’t synonyms for incredible,” I tease. When he swats my behind, I gasp.
“So clever. And Jocund. Jubilant. Docile. Lyrical. Demure. Jovial,” He punctuates each word with a kiss as he slides his arms under my legs and picks me up, pulling me to his chest so I can wrap my legs around his waist. The tip of his cock stretches up his abdomen, brushing against me with each step he takes. I tighten my grip around his neck as I rub myself against his rigid length.
“Fuck, baby, you’re so wet. Is all this for me?”
“This is what you do to me. Only you,” I admit.
He moves quickly over to the lounger, sinking into the deep curve in the middle of it, as he pulls me atop him. I melt against his chest, nuzzling my head into him as I reach up to trace the lines of his skull tattoo. His jaw flexes and he hisses in a breath as I get bold in my movements, grinding my center against him in slow quick thrusts.
“Did you finish?” I ask, looking up at him as the fingers stroking my back pause their movements.
“Tonight isn’t about my needs,” he says, cupping my cheek. “It’s about yours. You come first. You will always come first to me.”
His tone is serious, making it obvious that he’s not just talking about my pleasure. I tilt my head up to his as he slowly moves his lips closer to mine. “I love you, John,” I whisper softly right before his lips touch mine.
He stiffens against me, and then pulls back abruptly, holding my face in both hands and searching my eyes.
“Don’t tell me that right now.”
Blood rushes to my face as I squirm in his hold, wanting to escape his scrutiny and his command. “What?”
“Do you trust me, pet?”
Reluctantly, I give him a single nod.
“Do you want to please your dom?”
Again, I give him a solitary nod of agreement.
“Then you have to obey every command I give you in here. And I’m telling you not to tell me thatright now. Not when we’re in the middle of a scene. Not when you’re coming out of subspace and aren’t fully in control of your mind and words. Not when I can’t know for sure if it’s the high of your orgasm making you confess what you think I want to hear.”
He leans forward, pulling my cheek against his as he speaks against my ear.
“Don’t confess the words I’ve been waiting to hear since the day you stood up to me about how I graded your paper. Don’t get my hopes up when I can’t be sure it’s not the endorphins making you confess something you don’t really feel. Don’t make me fall more in love with you than I already am. Not when I can’t fully be with you the way you deserve.”
I’m not alone—he feels this too. This all-consuming feeling that keeps drawing us together like magnets. My heart beats wildly in my chest as our breathing slowly synchronizes. The cool metal of my nipple piercings heats against the warmth of his skin. I turn over his words in my mind, trying to pull the unspoken meaning from them.
“I want to hear your words when you have a clear mind. I need them so goddamn much.” His voice breaks on the last word, and I turn my head, pulling his lips to mine.
And I kiss him. Hard. Slow. Deliberately. With all the love I have in me, pouring it all into the kiss. If he won’t let me confess it with my words, I’m determined to show him with the press of my lips to his, the exploratory stroke of my tongue into his mouth, the way I dig my fingers into his skin to pull him closer as I thrust against his erection pinned between us.
We stay like that for what feels like ages, exploring each other’s mouths with our lips, teeth, and tongues as our handsroam each other’s bodies, groping, pinching, and caressing. It’s one long confession of feelings passing between us, and I’ve never felt more at peace, never felt safer, like this is exactly where I was meant to be my whole life, wrapped up in this man’s arms.
My arousal is at a fever pitch, and my thoughts are consumed with pleasure, his specifically. This man has spent all night worshipping my body and I want to make sure he knows how much I appreciate him. How much I need him to fall apart at my touch.
