Before dinner, Liam took Lily out to a swanky cocktail place a ten-minute walk from the restaurant. Dressed in a chic black dress and high heels, Lily sat at the bar on a tall stool, looking around the room at the ultra-wealthy Los Angeles girls and their perfect hair and makeup. Everyone looked extra-shiny and done up out here. Her heart jolted with jealousy. But Liam wastalking exuberantly about his career, how he wanted to spend the winter back in Nantucket with family before coming back to Los Angeles for another round of auditions.
“We’ll be here together,” he insisted. “By then, we’ll have the wedding fully planned out. It’ll be easy.”
Lily allowed herself to fall into his eyes and get lost there. She heard herself laughing, asking questions and telling stories. Liam seemed fascinated with her. “You’re more beautiful than I’ve ever seen you,” he said.
But when they reached the restaurant, Lily felt her excitement and confidence quake. Six of Liam’s cast members were there, all of them in their early to mid-twenties. The women had tight waists and loose, cool clothes, and the men were muscular with sterling white teeth. Everyone stood to hug Lily hello and gush about how happy they were to meet her.
“You’re the one who helped Bex fall in love!” an actress named Tasha said. “You have to tell us your secrets. Honestly, I never thought Bex would ever like anyone. It’s proof that we should all stay hopeful!”
Liam sat down opposite Bex, and Lily took the seat beside him.
“You should have heard Liam teasing Bex before her first date,” an actor named Tommy said. “What was it you said, Liam?”
Bex swatted the air. “He kept making really dumb skateboarding jokes.”
“Awful,” Tasha agreed.
“I was trying to keep things gliding,” Liam said, his eyes in slits. “I said I hope he says I ollie you soon.” Ollie was a skateboarding term for something Lily couldn’t remember.
Everyone roared with laughter. Lily grinned nervously, realizing that these were inside jokes that she would never fully grasp. She looked at her menu, then back up at Liam, realizinghe was still performing, searching for more skateboarding terms to tease Bex with.
“Here we go,” Tasha said, rolling her eyes. “Once he starts, it’s hard to get him to stop.”
“Set must be really fun?” Lily tried, her voice shaking.
“Fun is a word for it!” Bex cried. “It’s a little like we’re all being tortured together. Reading some of the worst scripts we’ve ever seen. Wondering if any of our scenes make sense.”
“Are you suggesting that my sudden transformation into a wolf-bear doesn’t make sense?” Tommy said, tilting his head.
“I’m not convinced my death scene will even make it in the final cut,” another woman named Zee said.
“Oh, but you were so good that day,” Bex said, pouting. She looked at Lily and added, “You’ve never seen someone die the way Zee died. I mean, you were foaming at the mouth!”
Zee grinned, pleased with herself. And now, they were off to the races on set conversations, discussing the scripts and their characters and using voices that made Lily dizzy. She’d never been a part of a theater troupe, never planned to act, and the full-on energy of the actors surrounding her felt a little like drowning. She picked at an appetizer and forced herself to laugh at all of their jokes.
Twice before the main course arrived, Bex and Liam found a way to touch hands. Lily’s heart hammered. It was obvious that they’d gotten very close, so much so that they finished each other’s sentences sometimes. Maybe they didn’t even notice they were touching? But when Liam reached across the table for a high-five from Bex, Lily got to her feet and excused herself for the bathroom. She thought she was going to throw up.
“You feel all right, Lily?” Tasha called after her.
“I’m great!” Lily said, her voice meek.
Once in the bathroom, Lily locked the door behind her, leaned against the cool wall, and bit her tongue to keep fromsobbing. The bathroom smelled of flowers and expensive soap. It reminded her, weirdly, of Yoko’s house. A part of her wished she were having a simple dinner with Liam, Yoko, and Kendall, that she had to answer boring parent questions and sip white wine rather than sit in the midst of Liam’s greatest joy and try to fit in.
Before she knew what she’d done, she dialed her sister Shelby. As it rang and rang across the continent, Lily tried to focus on her breathing and stand up straight. It occurred to her, before Shelby answered, that Lily had lost touch with most of her college friends. They’d gone to all corners of the United States—with their partners or solo—and taken up careers in fields they’d studied for. Lily had no qualms about her own career. Not yet, anyway. Being a matchmaker felt fulfilling. It paid well. It set her up to plan her own wedding (if she ever got around to it). But she hadn’t imagined she’d feel so alone this year.
“Sis?” Shelby answered brightly. “What’s up?”
“Shelby!” Lily’s heart leaped into her throat. “Where are you?”
“I’m out!” Shelby cried, and then Lily could hear a thumping bass and other nineteen-year-olds singing and celebrating their college weekend. “Here, let me get somewhere quieter.”
Lily waited, eyeing the door of the bathroom, praying that none of the other guests would need to get inside. It took Shelby nearly a full minute to get wherever she was going. Lily pictured her outside beneath a sprawling night sky, maybe wearing a little mini skirt, a flowing blouse, and a pair of boots. She still looked like such a kid in many ways. Lily’s heart went out to her.
And then, Lily allowed herself to burst into tears.
“What’s going on?” Shelby breathed. She sounded terrified. “Lily?”
“I’m so scared,” Lily whispered. She explained she was in a Los Angeles restaurant with six of Liam’s co-stars, including awoman he seemed sort of in love with. “What if I came all this way only to realize Liam and I aren’t meant to be?”
