My fingertips trail up his sides, palms pressing into his chest to glide up to his shoulders and grip them, massaging the thick muscle there. His eyes flutter closed with a sigh and I relish this small amount of comfort that I can offer him. It’s not enough. Not nearly enough. But it’s something, and all I want in this moment is to bring him comfort and assurance.
“It is what I desire. But also not what I desire,” I admit to myself and him. “My heart is knotted.”
“Then allow me to untie it.” He opens his eyes again. “I do not wish to leave you. I will spend forever with you, whether forever is years, or one last night. If forever is free, or chained.”
My hands return to cradling his cheeks and I draw his lips to my own quivering ones. I feel his mouth curl into a slight smile and I kiss him again. Frustration vines through me, tanglingand rooting deep into desperation. It blooms into haste that manifests as ferocity, deepening the kiss.
“How can you be smiling?” I rasp against his lips, emotion making my voice thick and heavy.
“I am kissing you. How could I not smile?”
I choke out laughter. Smiling now myself. “You are ridiculous.”
“Yet you love me all the same.”
“And I always will.” Another long, tender kiss. I would melt into this man if I could. Dissolve all space between us until we were one being—one soul, fused back as it should be.
“Stay with me a little bit longer?” It’s the first time he’s sounded desperate since I arrived. The first time I could feel the shroud of death moving through this room.Hello, old friend, I know you, my heart whispers as that specter looms over us.
“Of course.” As if I could refuse.
“I wish I could hold you.” His muscles flex as he strains against the chains. “Take you once more into my arms.”
“Let me hold you, then.” I wrap my arms around his waist, locking hands on elbows. He is so strong, yet, in this moment, feels as frail as a dove with a broken wing.
I press my cheek against his shoulder and he slumps into me as far as the chains allow. His face buries into the crook of my neck. Evander breathes deeply, exhaling warmth into my flesh.
“Tell me what you imagined all those years ago. If we were to have run away to marry, what it might have been like, looked like…”
I close my eyes and work to dredge up all those memories that I had drowned in the river of pain that had flowed through me following his loss and are now covered with the muck and haze of time. There is no reason for them to bring me agony anymore. All the fantasies I had lying up at night, heart fluttering after time spent with Evander, return in vivid detail.They come back to me like old friends, pleased to return after being shut out for so long.
My words weave images of flowers strung between trees. Of candles lining moss-carpeted grounds. Of a redwood that stretches high above us, connecting us with old gods and new, with spirits of old and with magics modern. How, in that moment, the world comes into focus. We see it all with perfect clarity—the great spinner’s wheel that is time and all the threads that bind us together. Our single knot in a great tapestry.
The heaviness of my body slips away and I give in to the fantasy. That long-forgotten dream. Evander is there with me, existing in this place constructed by our hearts and shared wish. He inhales sharply as, in my mind, we come to a stop before the redwood.
His lips move soundlessly against my skin as he recites simple and pure vows to me. And I do the same. We exist beyond our mortal shells. Are more than flesh and bone.
“I love you,” he breathes.
“And I love you.” I barely have time to utter the words when footsteps sound in the hall, echoing like ominous thunder. I straighten, looking behind my shoulder in fear and panic. My arms are still tight around Evander’s waist.
The nightmare that is Conri shatters our perfect dream. He appears, flanked by two knights and an alpha I vaguely recognize as the leader of the first pack.
“I am not surprised.” Nor does he sound even mildly upset. A wicked smile curls his lips, as sharp as a sickle. I am the harvest. “Take her.”
Fear and misbegotten desire have me clinging even tighter to Evander. It’s not time yet, it can’t be. Surely it’s too early. How long have I been down here?
“A little bit longer.” I wish my words were stronger, and without a slight quiver to them.
Evander barely has a chance to say my name—to make a sound—before the knights are upon me. They each take my arms, as they did to Evander earlier, prying me off of him. I try to fight, but I have little strength compared to them.
A heavy sigh has a bloodcurdling quality to it. Conri rounds the knights, positioning himself between me and Evander like the moon to the sun. An unnatural obfuscation—a violation of the laws of nature.
Wordlessly, he raises a hand and brings its back against my cheek with a swift and sharp crack. My head whips to the side and I see stars, supported only by the help of the knights for a moment. I blink, trying to bring the world back into focus.
“You bastard!” Evander roars. “Lay another hand on her and I will flay you where you stand and savor every minute of it!”
Conri looks over his shoulder, nose scrunched in disgust. But his eyes are lifeless. Two hollows void of any emotion. Any sense of mortality or feeling.
