The words hurt more than Eira wanted them to. She hated the sting they left in the still festering wound Ferro had created in her. First Adam, then Ferro… She knew how to pick men who would inevitably hurt her.
But where did that leave Cullen?
She could feel her face softening at the thought of Cullen and banished the mere idea of him. This wasn’t a place for thinking of him. What Eira was called to do—who she had to be to survive right now—wasn’t meant for Cullen and his tenderness. Who she was becoming might not ever be meant for such delicate and loving hands.
“But I admit, back then, I only saw you as someone to be used to bring about the glory of Yargen,” Ferro continued, oblivious.
“Back then; what about now?” She was safe as long as she was useful to him. That much was clear. And if she was going to keep manipulating him successfully she needed to know where she stood and what he wanted from her at all times.
“Now…” His fingers tightened. “Think about it, Eira. You and I…ushering in her glory. All of Solaris will look to you as one of their own who has seen the light—who has been blessed by her love. Bymylove.” Ferro exhaled with a small smile. He almost looked sincere. The expression made her hate him all the more. He wasn’t a mancapableof love.
Yet the mention of love brought Cullen to the fore once again. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t escape him. The thought of him pressing her against the wall at court, the feeling of his fingers in her hair. If she made it out of this alive…she’d kiss him like that again at least once. She’d not waste another moment with him or any of her friends.
“I want to be useful to you,” Eira said as delicately as possible.
Ferro tilted his head, clearly assessing her as a sinister grin slithered on his lips. He radiated a horrible smugness. “Howdo you want to be ‘useful’ to me?”
The implication had Eira biting back bile. She had to put a stop to his more sensual implications that she’d been ignoring until now. He could think of her as his pet, his student, a means to his ends. But she wasn’t going to let him think of her as an object of desire. Eira swallowed the bitter taste in her mouth and spoke with words with more ease than she would’ve been able to a week ago, given the rising panic within her.
“I want to bring about Yargen’s glory.” Eira wore a placid, awestruck expression. She looked at him as though he were a sculpture of the divine and not a man. Not someone that her mortal hands could or should touch. Not that she would ever even want to. “Once, I might have been a foolish girl and thought that the best way to do that would be toserve you.” She allowed a lustful tone to hover in the last two words. Hoping her intent was clear. Hoping he followed along. “But now I see there are far greater ways I can contribute. I was a foolish, confused little girl. But no longer. My eyes have been opened. I see the light and now I think I know how best I can bring about the Pillars’—and your—glory. It is with my magic and my adoration for your righteousness. It is by following your orders and wishes as a soldier should. Not by any girlish infatuations that are long gone.”
Recalculation shifted in his expressions. There was a sort of recalibration he went through as she spoke, no doubt reassessing how he could manipulate her. Ferro eased away from her and the atmosphere thinned.
“Go on. Tell me how you think you can be an effective tool for me.”
She would be a tool over his object of desire any day. “There’s something the Champion needs me to do—to listen to—right?”
Ferro nodded cautiously, prompting her to continue.
Eira drew a quivering breath, knowing what she was about to ask. If there was ever a moment she would overplay her hand, this was it. “I can find it.”
“How?” He narrowed his eyes slightly, no doubt putting together what she intended.
“Let me go back to Risen. I’ll make up a story about kidnappers I escaped from. They’ll see me as a competitor who fought and won to return. I’ll be celebrated and trusted.”
“But it will also stoke suspicion of the Pillars.” Ferro frowned.
She was in too deep; she couldn’t back down now. “Perhaps. But I can make up a story that will throw them off the trail of the Pillars. Risen is a large city. Cutthroats must be common enough and as a competitor I am already in the spotlight. If the Pillars are worried…send a ransom note ahead that corroborates this claim before I embark on my mission.”
Ferro seemed to be considering it.
“They won’t suspect me,” she continued. “They’ve already let me move freely in the Archives, even. I could find a way to get whatever you need, I’m sure of it.”
“They let you roam free in the Archives?” he questioned with an arch of his eyebrow.
“Yes.”
“Truly?”
“Yes.” Eira leaned forward. “I can do this for you. This is my destiny—why Yargen blessed me with this power.”
“You could get it and we could expose their lies at the competitor’s gala,” he murmured. “We could sacrifice some of the young ones to be the thieves. They would be happy to die for the Champion…” Ferro shook his head. “No, it’s too much of a risk.”
“I can do it,” Eira insisted. His attention slowly wandered to her. She searched his eyes, trying to ooze sincerity. “Let me.”
He stood, back to her. “It’s too risky.”
Eira watched as her chances for escape began to slip through her fingers. She’d find another way out, eventually. But how long wouldeventuallytake? Far too long. She didn’t want to wait here to find out how many more disturbing tests they’d force her to endure before they’d trust her to even walk around unsupervised.
