“No, I don’t.” The lie was weak and she knew it.
“And yet, when you retreat… I see you look back across the distance and I can’t help but feel like you don’t want to pull away.”
She couldn’t look at him. How had he seen truths that even she had been ignoring?
“Eira…” His fingers closed around her upper arm. “Look at me.” He tugged lightly and Eira obliged, tilting her chin up to meet his eyes. “Look me in the eyes and tell me that you’re all right.”
“I—” She choked on her words. But he didn’t give her a reprieve.
“Look me in the eyes and tell me you aren’t haunted every day by the things you’ve seen—by the things you’ve done.”
Eira pursed her lips together, feeling her lower one quivering slightly. He had no idea of the half of what she had done and what she was prepared to do, and that made her sick. What would Cullen think of her when he knew? His grip tightened slightly as he lifted his other hand. Cullen’s fingertip brushed against her brow as he tucked a wayward bit of hair behind her ear. The sunlight illuminated his eyes, turning them almost golden.
“It’s all right to hurt and share in that hurt,” he whispered. “Holding it in will only make it worse. Believe me, I know.”
“How could you know? How could you, of all people, possibly understand?”
“Because I—”
“Good evening, Levit. I’m here for my son.” Yemir’s voice brought Cullen to a halt. He glanced over his shoulder at the door, his face a mix of panic and frustration.
“Come with me tonight, Eira,” he whispered quickly. His eyes were ablaze for reasons she no longer understood.
“What? Where?”
“Agree to be my guest.”
“Guest?” Eira tried to piece together the information he was leaving out in his haste.
There was a dull banging noise, followed by, “Cullen? Are you in there?”
“You’ll love it, I’m sure. Plus, it’ll get you out of here. You’ve hardly left for the past day.” Cullen grabbed her fingers, pulling her toward the door.
“Wait, I—”
“I’m here, Father,” Cullen announced, stepping out.
Yemir’s eyes darted between Eira and his son, skeptical. “And just what were you doing in there?”
Noelle was perched on one of the sofas. Yemir’s back was to her, so luckily the senator missed her cat-like expression of glee at this twist of events. Eira briefly gave her a look. But it only made Noelle smirk more and mouth the word,scandalous.
“I was inviting Eira to the state dinner tonight,” Cullen announced. Yemir blinked several times over, clearly struggling to process this information with decorum. Cullen continued before his father could muster words. “You said that several competitors would be there. I thought it appropriate that Solaris be represented by more than one individual.”
“Good thinking, my boy,” Yemir said with a very forced smile. His gaze dipped to Noelle. “Though you have already invited Eira,twice, to court. Why don’t we bring Noelle instead? I wouldn’t want your fellow competitors to get jealous.”
“Don’t you worry your little senator head about me. I am incapable of being jealous of Eira—or anyone, for that matter,” Noelle proclaimed.
Eira wasn’t sure if she should laugh or be offended. A soft snort seemed like a good middle ground.
“Your uncle is a Western lord, isn’t he? Surely you are accustomed to formal dinners?”
“You said this was a casual gathering,” Cullen countered.
“Iamaccustomed to formal dinners,” Noelle said, rising to her feet with a flip of her hair. “And I can’t stand them. Such a bore.” She yawned. Yemir’s scowl deepened. “So while I dosoappreciate the invitation, Senator, I’m afraid I cannot. Especially because I already promised to have dinner with the morphi out on the terrace and it would be terribly rude if I didn’t show up.”
Noelle was mingling with the morphi? Eira didn’t know which way was up for a moment. She didn’t think Noelle, of all people, would go out of her way to get to know their competitors from across the world. What had she been missing while she’d holed up waiting for a lead on Ferro?
“Have fun, you two.” Noelle moved behind Yemir to give Eira a wink before sauntering to her room. However, she paused in the doorway. “Oh, and before you ask, Senator, I haven’t seen Alyss for hours. So you’d have to hunt her down if you’re still desperately searching for another option.”
