“I…” She ached all over. Every part of her screamed at the same time, demanding she chart a different course—any different course than what she was doing. But her hands wouldn’t listen. They smoothed down his sides, resting feather-light on his hips before tracking up his chest.
“Do you believe in us? Do you believe in our love?”
The question demanded an answer. Her throat was thick with all the words she wanted to say but didn’t know how.
“Tell me true right here and now and I will never ask again. I will shatter my heart into a thousand pieces because that is what it will take to make the damn thing stop beating for you.”
“I can’t lose you,” she repeated softly.
“That’s not what I asked.” He pressed his forehead against hers. “Ignore the world, Eira, and just listen to your heart, because that’s all I care about.”
“I love you so much it scares me,” she whispered through quivering lips.
“I know.” His lips crashed against hers with what felt like every emotion they had been holding back for the past week. Eira groaned softly as her body awakened to him.
Cullen cupped her cheek and held her lips to his. An arm tightened around her waist. She lost herself in his kiss—histaste. How she had missed him. Every inch of him pressed against her. The yearning that made her weak and left her perpetually wanting.
“You know this is a terrible idea, right?” Her slick lips glided over his. Pulling apart enough to talk was already turmoil.
“I think this is the best decision I’ve ever made.”
Arrogant man, Eira thought almost pleasantly as he sucked her lower lip between his teeth, nipping softly. It elicited a groan from her that she didn’t know she could make. Her body pressed into his and Cullen held her closer.
More. She wanted it all. She wanted to be bare and breathless before him. She wanted to shed her clothes and with them every worry, every reality that haunted her.
Cullen tipped her chin upward, kissing down and onto her neck. He bit her lightly, responding to her groan with a low growl of his own. The sound was molten heat, shooting straight through her, incinerating every nerve. Her nails dug into his shoulders, holding him to her as she let out a gasp.
With strength she didn’t know he possessed, Cullen pushed her farther up against the wall. Knowing what he desired—because her desires matched—Eira’s legs wrapped around his waist. Her arms were around his neck. His hands were under her, supporting her, sending shivers up her spine with every caress.
“I love you,” she rasped, pulling apart for air and pressing her nose into his. “I love you and because of it I might be your destruction.”
Cullen merely looked up at her with a languid smile. He oozed delicious sensuality as he held her, pinned against the wall. Eira ran her fingers through his dark brown tresses, silky even despite the night they’d had.
“You could never be my demise,” he whispered.
“But I will.” She knew her fate. Her whole existence was cursed. It was her destiny to suffer and bring suffering to those around her. Be it Adela, or some other cruel jest played on her by the uncaring divine.
“Then…if you are destined to destroy me, Eira…let it be a destruction of our choosing. I come to you a willing sacrifice.”
She brought her mouth back to his, hungry and yearning. He tasted of longing, of promise, of a hope she didn’t want to dare allow herself to feel. Every moment she spent with him wracked her with guilt. Yet every turn of his head, every caress of his tongue, slowly eased away those concerns. Eira was lost to the bliss that was his hands, his mouth, his body. She couldn’t fight it any longer. Merely trying was its own slow form of agony.
They might be headed for destruction. But they would go there together.
* * *
The next morning came too soon. It seemed as if Eira’s head had just hit the pillow when Levit was calling for all of them to get up so they could go to the training grounds. Prying herself from the warmth of her sheets, Eira washed her face again, dressed, and stole a moment to quietly stare out at the relentless dawn.
It would all be over soon. The ball was tomorrow night and that meant she only had to endure one day more of this limbo. One day more, and Ferro would be dead.
Eira emerged to see the rest of them gathered. Her eyes went on instinct to Cullen, but he barely spared her a glance. Last night they were on fire. But today he was nothing more than a statue of cool marble. He treated her with the same breezy distance that he had been for days now. She wondered if he was making a point to prove to her that he was capable of keeping them a secret.
“Come along then.” Levit started out of the room. Eira hung back, snagging Alyss’s elbow.
“Any problems with our feathered friend?” she asked. Alyss had been sleeping when she and Cullen had finally emerged. No sign of Arwin.
“No. I got her mostly patched up and she insisted on leaving before dawn.” Alyss grabbed Eira’s hand and squeezed it tightly. “You should have woken me when you got back.”
“I didn’t want to disturb your sleep; it was a long night.”
