“Tonight isn’t going to be any normal evening.”
“I’m not going to like this, am I?” A frown crossed his lips as he looked her up and down. “You’re dressed to go out.”
Vi pulled at the hem of her cloak. He must’ve remembered it from when she had last sneaked out into Soricium. That was when she still questioned the necessity of finding the apexes—before she had seen the end of the world. Before she had become invested inhim.
“I am.” Vi crossed to the window, putting her back to him. She didn’t want him to see her face because she still had yet to train an expression onto it when talking about her family. “I received word today that my mother will be here in roughly three days’ time.”
Taavin made no sound when he moved.He’s not actually here, she reminded herself time and again. Every instance was harder. Because she wanted him to be. She wanted his feet to actually touch the floor, his body to move the air around him as he stepped.
Yet, even though he wasn’t, Vi felt him as though he was. She felt his essence near as he crossed the room to stand behind her. He could make not a single sound or footfall, and she’d know exactly where he was.
She waited for him to say something. Curiously, he didn’t. Taavin was oddly quiet, as if waiting.
So Vi filled the silence.
“They’ve been preparing me all day for it. Tailors measured me and sketched ‘options’ as each of my tutors reviewed things. I took dinner with Sehra to discuss logistics… the White Death has really pared back the plans for the arrival.
“The whole Imperial parade was supposed to come into the city with all its fanfare and might. But now they don’t want to subject the military—or my mother and brother—to the illness that’s ravaging Soricium.
“Likely for the best. I can’t imagine the older residents of Soricium being particularly pleased about the Imperial militia in their city again, even briefly. Sehra agreed with me on that much.”
“How are you handling it all?” Taavin stopped her nervous rambling with a gentle hand on her elbow. The touch nearly made Vi jump from her skin, and she turned in place.
“What?” Vi’s voice had dropped to a whisper, though she didn’t know why. Perhaps it was because the question was so confusing. Or perhaps she had been wrong about knowingexactlywhere he was. Taavin was far closer than she expected. “What does that even mean?”
His emerald eyes searched her face. “It seems a lot all at once.”
“I can handle it.” She looked back toward the window.
“I never said you couldn’t.”
“It sounded like you implied it.” Vi still wasn’t looking at him, so she only heard the soft sound of his laughter.
“Inquiring after your emotional state suggests your ineptitude?”
“If you’re worried about my emotional state, you must think it’s unraveling. You must think that I can’t, or I won’t—”
“Or I merely care for you.” Her eyes flicked to him at that, and then promptly away. There was a raw emotion on his face that she didn’t want to investigate right now. Perhaps he was right to ask about her emotional state. Because merely seeing him look at her that way knotted her insides. “Does anyone around you see howyouare—the woman—not the princess, during all this?”
“Of course not. And why would they?” Vi added hastily. “This is what I’ve always wanted.” Now she didn’t know if she was speaking more to him, or to herself.
“Sometimes, getting what you’ve always wanted is the hardest part,” he murmured.
“What do you mean?” Vi turned in place to face him outright, rather than look out the window. Their chests were nearly brushing. Had he taken a step closer without her realizing?
Magic radiated off of him in warm, invisible waves. He was close enough that she could almost smell him, though Vi was certain she was merely imagining the soft aroma of lilies, cedar, and the fresh, clean air of spring.
“I’ve always wanted to leave this place, to see the world—to merely see Risen from beyond my tower and not through the curling smoke of Yargen’s flame. But I have no idea what I would feel, or do, if I had such freedom.”
“This is different,” she whispered.Was it?She was staring down the eve of her freedom, the day she would leave Soricium and finally see the wide world that had been confined to the four corners of her maps until now.
“I always wanted to understandyou,” he continued, ignoring her insistence. The statement stalled any further objection. Vi was vaguely aware of his hands scooping up hers. She had never recalled someone being as forward with her as he had become—all she knew was that she liked it. But Vi couldn’t recall much right now; the world started and ended for a few all too brief breaths with his shockingly green eyes. “The visions I had of you… relentless. I prayed to Yargen time and again to make sense of them, for the chance to understand them. I had all but given up hope in my confinement. And then, miraculously, you came to me. I got what I wanted and now…”
His voice faded away. Vi leaned in slightly, hanging on the absence of the rest of his thought.
“Now?” she barely breathed the word of encouragement.
“Now I don’t know what to do with you in my reach.” His gaze dropped to their hands and Vi’s did as well.
